186 results for “ido”
Hi everyone. I don't know if anyone here even likes facebook, but I want to stream there,and can not because I do not have at least 100 followers. :/
anyways, I am not above bribery, so I am giving away this BOSS Slicer effects pedal in exchange for some follows.
Maybe some good people here can encourage me and my practice sessions with some socmed love?
video in first comment. <3
Listening to other pieces of Grant Kirkhope, I recognise familiar parts. Like sometimes I expect it to continue as the LOTR/Hobbit OST or some other instrumental song I heard sometime and some I do not not know or cant remember the name.
This reminded my observation of my own humming, which tends to be a disticnt melodies or sometimes a mix of what I heard sometime.
This one is a bit of a #piecemeal. I painted a couple of wooden boards a couple of years ago but wasn’t all that happy with them at the time. I took some photos and then painted over the boards.
Some time later I came across the photo again and started fiddling with it on #Procreate. So this is #AcrylicPaint / #DigitalArt and I do very much identify with her #FacialExpression.
#Rstats + AI is doing a survey: https://rconsortium.github.io/RplusAI_website/survey.html
I do not fill qualified to submit it (and it looks like it will took more time to fill it that doing this toot).
Data and CS literacies >> AI for my "Real-World Workflows"
"Don’t you care about anything?"
"Actually I do, thank you for asking. Hm. What do I care about? Are you familiar with... Ducktales?"
— mythic quest (2020)
14. artist is a name
"I'm not an artist,” says a mouse.
"You're a person that posts art, regularly.”
She, my conversational partner, imagined in my head, thinks that’s important.
“I do.”
“Someone who does art. Someone who must do art. What is that?”
"A person who does art.”
She scowls.
“An artist, I suppose."
"You do that."
"Yes, but I'm not an artist."
A robot does not see meaning in these words, but a mouse looks at the words in wonder and fear. To a mouse, the words carry much weight. They appear to be true, a mouse says to herself, but how do you find what you’ve built your life on denying?
Doug Bradley is iconic as Pinhead, but I do find it cruel that the studio didn't have the decency to give Fornicus a call to let him know that he didn't get the part.
.
#FrightClub #HellraiserII #CabinInTheWoods
“0:18:56 – Tin Machine - Baby Universal 0:22:11 – Bryan Adams - (Everything I Do) I Do It For You #TOTP #TopOfThePops... / “Top of the Pops - 24th October 1991” (1 user) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jCuN0zuyaKE
@BigB63
#𝔹𝕚𝕘𝔹𝟞𝟛
#𝔹𝕣𝕚𝕒𝕟ℂ
#𝔹𝕣𝕚𝕒𝕟
#𝕊𝕥𝕖𝕗
#𝕊𝕥𝕖𝕗𝕒𝕟𝕚𝕒
#𝕊𝕥𝕖𝕗𝕤ℙ𝕚𝕔𝕜𝕤
𝔹𝕣𝕚𝕒𝕟
𝕚𝕤
#𝕠𝕟𝕝𝕪
𝟙 𝕠𝕗 𝟚
𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕥 𝕀
#𝕜𝕟𝕠𝕨 𝕠𝕗
𝕨𝕙𝕠 𝕖𝕧𝕖𝕟
𝕨𝕙𝕖𝕟
#ℝ𝕖𝕡𝕝𝕪
𝕀 𝕕𝕠 ℕ𝕠𝕥
#𝕣𝕖𝕔𝕖𝕚𝕧𝕖
#ℕ𝕠𝕥𝕚𝕗𝕚𝕔𝕒𝕥𝕚𝕠𝕟.
#𝔻𝕠𝕦𝕓𝕝𝕖ℂ𝕙𝕖𝕔𝕜𝕖𝕕
𝕞𝕪
#𝕊𝕖𝕥𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤
𝕤𝕠 𝕟𝕠𝕥 𝕠𝕟
𝕞𝕪 𝕖𝕟𝕕.
𝕋𝕙𝕦𝕤
#𝕚𝕟𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕒𝕕
𝕀
#𝕔𝕙𝕖𝕔𝕜
𝕠𝕟 𝕪𝕠𝕦𝕣
𝕒𝕔𝕔𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕥.
𝕐𝕖𝕥 𝕨𝕙𝕒𝕥
#𝕗𝕦𝕣𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕣
𝕥𝕙𝕣𝕠𝕨𝕤 𝕚𝕥 𝕠𝕗𝕗
𝕚𝕤 𝔹𝕣𝕚𝕒𝕟'𝕤
#ℙ𝕚𝕟𝕟𝕖𝕕 #ℙ𝕠𝕤𝕥𝕤.
𝕀
#𝕤𝕖𝕖
𝕥𝕙𝕒𝕥
𝕀 #𝕟𝕖𝕖𝕕
𝕥𝕠
#𝕘𝕠
#𝕓𝕖𝕪𝕠𝕟𝕕
#𝕒𝕟𝕪 𝕠𝕗
𝔹𝕣𝕚𝕒𝕟'𝕤
ℙ𝕚𝕟𝕟𝕖𝕕 ℙ𝕠𝕤𝕥𝕤
𝕥𝕠 #𝔻𝕚𝕤𝕔𝕠𝕧𝕖𝕣
𝕨𝕙𝕖𝕟 𝔹𝕣𝕚𝕒𝕟
𝕨𝕒𝕤 #𝕝𝕒𝕤𝕥 𝕠𝕟
+ 𝕚𝕗
#𝕓𝕠𝕠𝕤𝕥-𝕖𝕕
𝕒 #𝕡𝕠𝕤𝕥
𝕒𝕟𝕕 𝕚𝕗
#𝕣𝕖𝕡𝕝𝕚𝕖𝕕.
𝕆𝕟
𝕐𝕠𝕦𝕣
#𝕋𝕠𝕡𝕚𝕔
𝕛𝕦𝕤𝕥
𝕟𝕠𝕥
𝕗𝕠𝕣 ℂ𝕝𝕦𝕓
𝕣𝕒𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕣
#𝔻𝕣𝕖𝕤𝕤𝕖𝕕
𝕗𝕠𝕣 𝕥𝕙𝕖
#𝕊𝕔𝕖𝕟𝕖
#ScribesAndMakers 27/10: Do you collect (unaltered) natural materials for projects.
For work I do. There are two art projects we do that involve natural materials, one is drawing seeds from trees and the other is using natural materials for mark making. And every year I go out collecting cherry plums and crabapples from hedgerows to make jelly (the jam kind). I guess that counts as a creative project too.
Happy Carday
My car is a year old. Or maybe not because I’m not sure if a car’s birthday is the day is was manufactured, or the day it arrived at the dealership, or the day I went out and picked it up. You can see I don’t know much about car birthdays.
Its birthday (by my definition which is the day I picked it up) was actually yesterday and we went out and celebrated by driving to the park. We got there and I turned it off and opened the door and it told me it didn’t want me to get out and walk and I told it that it was the park and it said to me, “Yes, but it’s my birthday (by your definition) and I don’t want to be left alone in the parking lot with a bunch of scary cars.”
“They’re just cars,” I said. “They’re not scary.”
“Says someone who isn’t a car.”
My car and I, we apparently have a lot in common.
“Well, what can I do about—”
“You can just stay with me.”
So I sat and read and looked out at trees periodically and the car sat and rested. Or whatever cars do when they’re turned off. Except for the tires and the windshield wipers the thing is pretty much one giant computer so for all I know it rests by examining and evaluating my driving habits and radio preferences and my inability to sing and uploads all that information somewhere.
We get along alright. It’s a Scorpio like me and I suspect that’s the reason why. And why we both like it when I drive through puddles. It’s surprising to me how many miles I don’t drive anymore since I don’t go to work every day. I should probably get out more. Go to a grocery store farther away. Travel. Maybe go to St. Paul or something.
Car:
Please don’t anyone tell my car that I thought of a song about an Oldsmobile, but I don’t know of any songs about Toyotas.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=260hXID0Yo0&list=RD260hXID0Yo0&start_radio=1
#birthday #Car #Family #Life #Love
Help Is Urgently Needed!
#Disability #Poverty #Aging #Health
🚨 URGENT HELP NEEDED TODAY 🚨
I am a 48-year-old disabled man living in poverty, and I am struggling to survive.
Every day is a battle against constant pain, sleepless nights, hunger, declining health, worsening vision, vertigo, mobility issues, cognitive decline, and the harsh reality that my disability income does not come close to covering the cost of living.
I face impossible choices every day:
Food or hygiene.
Medication or necessities.
Survival today or survival tomorrow.
I have no safety net. No financial cushion. No family support. No meaningful support system.
I am asking for help because I genuinely do not know how much longer I can continue carrying this burden alone.
My Reality
I live solely on SSDI.
I have no health insurance.
I do not drive.
I live in a rural area with no public transportation, meaning everything I need must be delivered or depend on finding someone willing and able to help.
My housing situation is unstable. Part of my rent is paid through helping maintain the property where I live, but my disabilities and declining health are making even those responsibilities increasingly difficult.
I am aging in poverty, and every year brings new physical limitations, more pain, and greater uncertainty.
I am not getting better.
I am getting worse.
My Health Is Declining
My days are consumed by:
Chronic pain
Exhaustion
High blood pressure fluctuations
Vertigo and dizziness
Poor mobility
Knee, hip, ankle, and joint pain
Numbness and weakness in my hands
Cognitive and executive functioning decline
Vision problems and light sensitivity
Dental issues
Anxiety, PTSD, and Bipolar Disorder
Some days my vision becomes a fuzzy blur. Bright light hurts. Low light makes basic tasks difficult.
If I sit too long, my joints lock up.
If I stand too long, my legs burn and stiffen.
If I lie down, pain spreads throughout my body.
Simple daily activities that most people take for granted are becoming harder and harder to accomplish.
Why I Am Reaching Out
I am exhausted.
Physically.
Mentally.
Emotionally.
Spiritually.
I have spent years contacting organizations, charities, government agencies, advocacy programs, nonprofits, and anyone I could think of for help.
Most of the time I receive lists of resources, referrals, phone numbers, websites, and suggestions.
What I do not receive are results.
I desperately need someone willing to understand my actual circumstances and help create real, concrete solutions.
I do not need more lists.
I need advocacy.
I need a social worker or case manager who can help navigate housing, healthcare, benefits, food security, transportation, and long-term stability.
I know resources exist.
I simply cannot seem to access them on my own.
A Recent Example
A few months ago, I developed a serious dental problem.
The pain became so severe that my landlord had to take me to the emergency room simply to obtain antibiotics.
After extensive effort and repeated requests, I was able to receive an examination and X-rays, only to be referred elsewhere for additional care I could not afford and could not reliably travel to.
Multiple emails and follow-ups produced little more than apologies and delays.
This experience reflects a much larger problem:
Many disabled people are given information about help.
Far fewer are actually able to obtain that help.
What I Need Most
Immediate Needs
Food and groceries
Hygiene supplies
Clothing
Medical and dental care
Transportation assistance
Household necessities
Relief from immediate financial crisis
Long-Term Needs
Stable, permanent housing
Consistent food security
Reliable healthcare access
Advocacy and case management
A sustainable future with dignity and security
My greatest need is stability.
I need a forever home where I can live safely for the rest of my life without constantly fearing homelessness, displacement, or crisis.
This Is About Dignity
This is not a request for luxury.
It is a plea for dignity.
Poverty is expensive.
Disability is exhausting.
Hunger is cruel.
Isolation is crushing.
I am trying to survive while my body and mind continue to deteriorate.
Despite everything, I continue to fight every day.
I continue to hope.
I continue to ask for help.
Financial Needs
Today's Goal
$8,455
Annual Survival Need
$27,255
Monthly Survival Need
$1,500
Immediate Stabilization Goal
$25,000
Long-Term Housing and Security Goal
$5,000,000
A stable, accessible, permanent property would not only give me safety and security, but potentially allow me to spend the remainder of my life helping others who struggle as I have.
How You Can Help
Donate
🔗 PayPal:
paypal.com/donate?campaign_id=…
💸 Cash App:
$woctxphotog
Share
If you cannot donate, please share this with others.
Every dollar helps.
Every share matters.
Every act of compassion makes a difference.
Final Words
I am tired.
I am hungry.
I am in pain.
I am scared of what tomorrow may bring.
But I am still here, still fighting, and still hoping someone will hear me.
If you have ever known hardship, loss, fear, hunger, loneliness, disability, or uncertainty, then you know that compassion can mean everything.
Please help if you can.
Thank you for taking the time to read my story.
#MutualAid #Disabled #Disability #Poverty #Housing #Health #Healthcare #DentalHealth #FoodInsecurity #ChronicIllness #MentalHealth #PTSD #Bipolar #Survival #Support #Compassion #Empathy #Aging #Help #Dignity #Rent #Groceries #Hygiene #CommunitySupport #Life
On Friday it was 14 years since my estranged mother died.
I keep mentally prodding myself, as though there’s something I should be feeling. But I don’t. Feel anything that is.
We had been estranged for some 14 years before that, so I don’t know why I’m expecting this ‘something’.
I tolerated a lot of misery for the sake of others, but once my child was born I couldn’t bear to think of them being contaminated by any of it. So that was that.
I think I gained more than I lost. Though at times I still long for a(n unrealistic) family life. 🤷🏻♀️ Then I get annoyed with myself for wasting time thinking/wanting what I haven’t had instead of appreciating and making the best of what I do have.
Beep Boop: Alien hates doing #selfPromo so made a bot to do it instead!
I have tons of stuff available in my Ko-fi shop, including #knitting patterns, #crossStitch patterns and more!
https://ko-fi.com/alien_sunset/shop
check out https://alien-sunset.neocities.org for all the cool things I do!
People who understand #mastodon / #fediverse better than me:
Occasionally in my feed on masto, I see posts from from actors/accounts I do not follow, that are not tagged with any hashtags I follow (the example has no hashtags), were not boosted by anyone I follow, and are not homed to the same mastodon server as my account.
Case in point, the attached. To be clear, this is in no way a comment regarding the content of that post; I present it only as an example of a Mastodon behavior that indicates my mental model of how this works is somehow incomplete or broken.
When this happens, it _feels_ like the source has managed to exploit some edge case in Mastodon’s use of ActivityPub, or my client’s support for the Mastodon API, of which I’m unaware, which gives me a perhaps unduly squikky feeling.
Any ideas? I just want to understand.
Happy early Halloween, everyone! I do hope everyone is enjoying all the spookiness that comes with the month same as I am!
I'd love to know: what's your favorite horror game?
#halloween #digitalart #sfwfurry
Hm, on the other hand, I could *probably* just have a #PHP based #CalDAV server be reachable only over VPN. Or how would I do some level of sync with a work machine? 🤔
(With the sole exception of Radicale, which explicitly says "if you want a server more respectful of CalDAV and #CardDAV specs, look at those other ones" and is Python, if you rule out those with heavy LLM involvement, you're left only with PHP based servers)
Nórske médiá sa pustili do boja s Metou. Nechcú, aby zneužívala ich obsah na sociálnych sieťach na trénovanie AI
Thinking, analyzing what you do or afraid to do, why you do not do smth, what blocks/hinders something, your fears/worries might be helpful.
I should probably write down what is stopping me from doing something fun like a STEM project.
I worry if I am not a STEM person now? Is my fate in more existential areas like Philosophy, Psychology and etc.
Of course I sometimes think of Dunning Krugger effect. (IIRC it is called like that). And that is I am at the bottom of knowledge, but at near peak of confidence??? However I seem to be open minded? How could an open minded person be overly confident?
I was thinking lately of patents, and if it is legal to do some patented thing and open source it? That would be cool. Also I was thinking about money, I want money. One of the reasons I want money is to be calm and be sure about my future.
I am feeling that I am chasing the value, the perfect value, the perfect project to do. But that seem to not exist or be extremely rare. What should I do
Every single Slack feature is bugging me to use Halloween stuff. Themes. Emojis. Something else.
I DO NOT CARE, I NEED TO GET MY WORK DONE.
#ScribesAndMakers 10/27. Do you collect (unaltered) natural materials for projects?
I do not have projects that require anything except a computer.
This is a submission for the Hacktoberfest Open-Source AI Challenge Week 4: Ghost in the Machine.
I am a B.A. History student at Burdwan University. For this challenge, I wanted to build something that connects my interest in History with my interest in AI.
My project is called Itihaser Bhoot (ইতিহাসের ভূত). It is an offline AI assistant that acts like a ghost of a historical figure. It answers History questions using only my own notes.
The idea is simple: an AI that knows what I have studied, shows where its answers come from, and admits when it does not know something.
What I Built
Itihaser Bhoot is a local History question-answering system.
It has three main goals:
I wanted to avoid answers that sound convincing but are not supported by my study material.
Demo
The project runs locally on my laptop.
Example workflow:
The goal is not to make the AI sound knowledgeable about everything. It is to make it reliable within the limits of my notes.
Code
GitHub repository: [Add your repository link here]
The repository contains the code and instructions for running the project locally.
How I Built It
I used Gemma 3 1B through Ollama for local language generation.
For retrieving relevant passages from my notes, I used BM25. It helps find text that matches the question before the model generates an answer.
The system follows a retrieval-based approach:
I built this on a laptop with 3.6 GB of RAM.
I wanted to see whether a small local model could be useful for a focused academic task without relying on a cloud API.
Why Open Innovation Matters
For me, open innovation means making useful technology accessible to people who do not have powerful computers or paid AI subscriptions.
Itihaser Bhoot has a few practical advantages:
As a student, these things matter to me. I want to experiment with AI while keeping control over my own study material.
What Went Wrong
The project is still experimental, and I faced several problems.
The biggest challenge was answer quality. A small model can sometimes misunderstand a retrieved passage or produce an answer that goes beyond the available evidence.
Bengali also introduced additional difficulties. Bengali questions and notes do not always produce reliable retrieval results. The model can struggle with Bengali phrasing, historical terminology, and generating natural Bengali answers.
Another challenge is refusal behavior. Even when the notes do not contain an answer, the model may try to generate one. I need to improve the system's ability to recognize when the retrieved evidence is insufficient.
I am still testing these limitations rather than claiming they are solved.
Prize Category: Best Use of Gemma
I am submitting Itihaser Bhoot for Best Use of Gemma.
I used Gemma 3 1B as a local language model for a specific academic purpose. The project is not intended to replace textbooks, teachers, or historical research.
It is an experiment in building a small, private, and evidence-based History assistant using open tools.
I hope to improve its retrieval quality, Bengali support, and refusal behavior as I continue working on it.
Hacktoberfest #devchallenge #hf26challenge #opensource #ai
#devchallenge #hf26challenge #software #coding #development #engineering #inclusive #community
Itihaser Bhoot: An Offline Ghost of History
Another #Chekov moment from "The Way to Eden." He explains to Irina that he & Spock are using the ship's computers to look for Eden.
Her take is interesting in 2026.
IRINA: Do you know all these things?
CHEKOV: What I do not know I find out from the computer banks. If, if I knew nothing at all, I could navigate the ship simply by studying what is stored in there. They contain the sum of all human knowledge. They solve our problems of navigation. Of control. Of life support.
IRINA: They tell you what to do, and you do what they tell you.
CHEKOV: No. We use our own judgment also.
IRINA: I could never obey a computer.
FOOD, HEALTHCARE, CLOTHING, PERSONAL HYGIENE, RENT, LIFE BEYOND STRUGGLING TO EXIST! I DESPERATELY NEED HELP NOW! I DO NOT FEEL WELL AND I NEED TO BE ABLE TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF!
I desperately need to place a serious #food and #personalhygiene order, all of my basic staples are gone, all the supporting basics are gone, your Compassionate Support would be a massive relief and replenishing blessing today;
Today's Needed Goal: **$300**
**The world is indifferent. But your kindness can rewrite the script.**
$5-10-15 It All Helps,
🔗 Donate here: paypal.com/donate?campaign_id=…
💸 CashApp: $woctxphotog
**Please share. Please help. Every dollar matters. Every act of compassion echoes.**
#MutualAid, #Disabled, #Poverty, #Help, #Survival, #Compassion, #Pain, #MentalHealth, #Food, #Groceries, #Hygiene, #Anxiety, #PTSD, #Bipolar, #Dignity, #Disablity, #Life, #Housing, #Support, #Aging, #Love, #Empathy, #Health, #Rent, #Cronicillness, #dentalhealth, #healthcare, #dental, #Emergency, #oralhealth,
FOOD, HEALTHCARE, CLOTHING, PERSONAL HYGIENE, RENT, LIFE BEYOND STRUGGLING TO EXIST! I DESPERATELY NEED HELP NOW! I DO NOT FEEL WELL AND I NEED TO BE ABLE TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF!
I desperately need to place a serious #food and #personalhygiene order, all of my basic staples are gone, all the supporting basics are gone, your Compassionate Support would be a massive relief and replenishing blessing today;
Today's Needed Goal: **$300**
**The world is indifferent. But your kindness can rewrite the script.**
$5-10-15 It All Helps,
🔗 Donate here: paypal.com/donate?campaign_id=…
💸 CashApp: $woctxphotog
**Please share. Please help. Every dollar matters. Every act of compassion echoes.**
#MutualAid, #Disabled, #Poverty, #Help, #Survival, #Compassion, #Pain, #MentalHealth, #Food, #Groceries, #Hygiene, #Anxiety, #PTSD, #Bipolar, #Dignity, #Disablity, #Life, #Housing, #Support, #Aging, #Love, #Empathy, #Health, #Rent, #Cronicillness, #dentalhealth, #healthcare, #dental, #Emergency, #oralhealth,
You are in my very soul, tormenting me. What can I do? I will do anything that you ask.
FOOD, HEALTHCARE, CLOTHING, PERSONAL HYGIENE, RENT, LIFE BEYOND STRUGGLING TO EXIST! I DESPERATELY NEED HELP NOW! I DO NOT FEEL WELL AND I NEED TO BE ABLE TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF!
I desperately need to place a serious #food and #personalhygiene order, all of my basic staples are gone, all the supporting basics are gone, your Compassionate Support would be a massive relief and replenishing blessing today;
Today's Needed Goal: **$300**
**The world is indifferent. But your kindness can rewrite the script.**
$5-10-15 It All Helps,
🔗 Donate here: paypal.com/donate?campaign_id=…
💸 CashApp: $woctxphotog
**Please share. Please help. Every dollar matters. Every act of compassion echoes.**
#MutualAid, #Disabled, #Poverty, #Help, #Survival, #Compassion, #Pain, #MentalHealth, #Food, #Groceries, #Hygiene, #Anxiety, #PTSD, #Bipolar, #Dignity, #Disablity, #Life, #Housing, #Support, #Aging, #Love, #Empathy, #Health, #Rent, #Cronicillness, #dentalhealth, #healthcare, #dental, #Emergency, #oralhealth,
FOOD, HEALTHCARE, CLOTHING, PERSONAL HYGIENE, RENT, LIFE BEYOND STRUGGLING TO EXIST! I DESPERATELY NEED HELP NOW! I DO NOT FEEL WELL AND I NEED TO BE ABLE TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF!
I desperately need to place a serious #food and #personalhygiene order, all of my basic staples are gone, all the supporting basics are gone, your Compassionate Support would be a massive relief and replenishing blessing today;
Today's Needed Goal: **$300**
**The world is indifferent. But your kindness can rewrite the script.**
$5-10-15 It All Helps,
🔗 Donate here: paypal.com/donate?campaign_id=…
💸 CashApp: $woctxphotog
**Please share. Please help. Every dollar matters. Every act of compassion echoes.**
#MutualAid, #Disabled, #Poverty, #Help, #Survival, #Compassion, #Pain, #MentalHealth, #Food, #Groceries, #Hygiene, #Anxiety, #PTSD, #Bipolar, #Dignity, #Disablity, #Life, #Housing, #Support, #Aging, #Love, #Empathy, #Health, #Rent, #Cronicillness, #dentalhealth, #healthcare, #dental, #Emergency, #oralhealth,
Help Today Sure Would Be A True Blessing;
#Disability #Poverty #Aging #Health
🚨 URGENT HELP NEEDED TODAY 🚨
I am a 48-year-old disabled man living in poverty, and I am struggling to survive.
Every day is a battle against constant pain, sleepless nights, hunger, declining health, worsening vision, vertigo, mobility issues, cognitive decline, and the harsh reality that my disability income does not come close to covering the cost of living.
I face impossible choices every day:
Food or hygiene.
Medication or necessities.
Survival today or survival tomorrow.
I have no safety net. No financial cushion. No family support. No meaningful support system.
I am asking for help because I genuinely do not know how much longer I can continue carrying this burden alone.
My Reality
I live solely on SSDI.
I have no health insurance.
I do not drive.
I live in a rural area with no public transportation, meaning everything I need must be delivered or depend on finding someone willing and able to help.
My housing situation is unstable. Part of my rent is paid through helping maintain the property where I live, but my disabilities and declining health are making even those responsibilities increasingly difficult.
I am aging in poverty, and every year brings new physical limitations, more pain, and greater uncertainty.
I am not getting better.
I am getting worse.
My Health Is Declining
My days are consumed by:
Chronic pain
Exhaustion
High blood pressure fluctuations
Vertigo and dizziness
Poor mobility
Knee, hip, ankle, and joint pain
Numbness and weakness in my hands
Cognitive and executive functioning decline
Vision problems and light sensitivity
Dental issues
Anxiety, PTSD, and Bipolar Disorder
Some days my vision becomes a fuzzy blur. Bright light hurts. Low light makes basic tasks difficult.
If I sit too long, my joints lock up.
If I stand too long, my legs burn and stiffen.
If I lie down, pain spreads throughout my body.
Simple daily activities that most people take for granted are becoming harder and harder to accomplish.
Why I Am Reaching Out
I am exhausted.
Physically.
Mentally.
Emotionally.
Spiritually.
I have spent years contacting organizations, charities, government agencies, advocacy programs, nonprofits, and anyone I could think of for help.
Most of the time I receive lists of resources, referrals, phone numbers, websites, and suggestions.
What I do not receive are results.
I desperately need someone willing to understand my actual circumstances and help create real, concrete solutions.
I do not need more lists.
I need advocacy.
I need a social worker or case manager who can help navigate housing, healthcare, benefits, food security, transportation, and long-term stability.
I know resources exist.
I simply cannot seem to access them on my own.
A Recent Example
A few months ago, I developed a serious dental problem.
The pain became so severe that my landlord had to take me to the emergency room simply to obtain antibiotics.
After extensive effort and repeated requests, I was able to receive an examination and X-rays, only to be referred elsewhere for additional care I could not afford and could not reliably travel to.
Multiple emails and follow-ups produced little more than apologies and delays.
This experience reflects a much larger problem:
Many disabled people are given information about help.
Far fewer are actually able to obtain that help.
What I Need Most
Immediate Needs
Food and groceries
Hygiene supplies
Clothing
Medical and dental care
Transportation assistance
Household necessities
Relief from immediate financial crisis
Long-Term Needs
Stable, permanent housing
Consistent food security
Reliable healthcare access
Advocacy and case management
A sustainable future with dignity and security
My greatest need is stability.
I need a forever home where I can live safely for the rest of my life without constantly fearing homelessness, displacement, or crisis.
This Is About Dignity
This is not a request for luxury.
It is a plea for dignity.
Poverty is expensive.
Disability is exhausting.
Hunger is cruel.
Isolation is crushing.
I am trying to survive while my body and mind continue to deteriorate.
Despite everything, I continue to fight every day.
I continue to hope.
I continue to ask for help.
Financial Needs
Today's Goal
$8,455
Annual Survival Need
$27,255
Monthly Survival Need
$1,500
Immediate Stabilization Goal
$25,000
Long-Term Housing and Security Goal
$5,000,000
A stable, accessible, permanent property would not only give me safety and security, but potentially allow me to spend the remainder of my life helping others who struggle as I have.
How You Can Help
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Every dollar helps.
Every share matters.
Every act of compassion makes a difference.
Final Words
I am tired.
I am hungry.
I am in pain.
I am scared of what tomorrow may bring.
But I am still here, still fighting, and still hoping someone will hear me.
If you have ever known hardship, loss, fear, hunger, loneliness, disability, or uncertainty, then you know that compassion can mean everything.
Please help if you can.
Thank you for taking the time to read my story.
#MutualAid #Disabled #Disability #Poverty #Housing #Health #Healthcare #DentalHealth #FoodInsecurity #ChronicIllness #MentalHealth #PTSD #Bipolar #Survival #Support #Compassion #Empathy #Aging #Help #Dignity #Rent #Groceries #Hygiene #CommunitySupport #Life
Why the 8-hour workday is a scam for people with ADHD (like me).
To cater to the way my brain works, I get in the rollercoaster at the start of the workday and I follow the impulses of my brain.
This sounds crazy, but actually I found out that this works better for me than resisting the thoughts and impulses that my brain wants to follow.
In practice this means that:
- focus work HAS to happen in the morning or it won't happen at all
- I do way too many things sequentially, a lot of context switching
- I am extremely tired by 15:00-16:00 because of said context-switching
I did get a lot done, though. Way more compared to the era where I was cosplaying as a neurotypical person.
This is how I work "with" my ADHD, no meds required.