#thisreallyhappened — Public Fediverse posts
Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #thisreallyhappened, aggregated by home.social.
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When you're sharing at book club and realize that the host read the wrong book.
#AwkwardBookMoments #HashTagGames
#ThisReallyHappened -
My coworker just asked me this question. And I have to choose one. I could either have unlimited sex for the rest of my life or eat whatever I wanted without gaining a pound..
That question is so unfair. Either way, I'm starving. #shitpost #thisreallyhappened #workday
Jamie
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Guy: Sex talk.
Me: Answers, changes topic
Guy: Answers, back to sex talk.
Me: indulges, changes topic.
Guy: Answers, back to sex talk.
Me: Ignores sex talk, hello, pultonic?
Guy: Apologizes, two DM's back and forth, non-sexual. Then, back to sex talk..
Me: Stops answering...#dating #singleanddating #datingapphell #thisreallyhappened
Jamie
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Have you ever called out someone for being a rude and inconsiderate asshole, and then the next time you encounter them in a similar situation, they use the one size fits all empathetic phrase, "I'm sorry that happened to you," and it's so painfully obvious its fake, that your eyes squint and water? #thisreallyhappened #fakeasspeople
Jamie
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Me: [rides roller coaster]
Apple Watch: "Looks like you've been in a car crash! Are you okay?"Me: [orgasms loudly]
Apple Watch: "It's really noisy here! You should protect your hearing!"Me: "You don't want me to have any fun at all, do you?"
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This summer we visited the Village of Elbow in Saskatchewan, Canada.
My youngest gets the pun crown for Elbow: "I wonder if this town had only one founder, or if it was a joint effort." 😂 So proud.
My inferior pun: "I hear the mayor had to resign... turns out he was crooked."
Elbow has under 400 census residents, like the Village of Eyebrow I puntificated about here: https://sfba.social/@mrbenji/109532956813125870
#ThisReallyHappened #improv #DadJoke #pun #DadJokes #puns #Canada #Saskatchewan #humor #joke #humour
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There’s a village (population ~135) named “Eyebrow” in Saskatchewan, Canada.
As we approached it on Hwy 42, I quipped that if it were wiped out by a tornado, the next day's headlines would probably read: "Eyebrow Razed!"
I also mused that when the fields surrounding the village are all prepped for planting, the community bulletin board probably announces: "Eyebrow's Furrowed." 😉
#ThisReallyHappened #improv #DadJoke #pun #DadJokes #puns #Canada #Saskatchewan #humor #joke #humour -
Intentionally misinterpreting things is sort of a hobby of mine. (smirk)
#DadJoke #pun #DadJokes #puns #humor #funny #humour #funWithLanguage #thisReallyHappened
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This was posted in our break room last year... I couldn't resist replying to the sign.
#DadJoke #DadJokes #GrammarPolice #funWithLanguage #humor #funny #humour #joke #thisReallyHappened
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A coworker was telling a group of us about her upcoming trip to Vegas.
Coworker: "We're gonna go ziplining."
Officemate: "What, from hotel to hotel?"
Coworker: "No, we're gonna zipline in the gorges outside of Vegas."
Me: "Oooh... I hear there are some GORGEOUS gorges outside of Vegas!"BTW, in my imagination the zipline company owner is named George... and his company is "George's Gorgeous Gorges."
#ThisReallyHappened #DadJoke reflexes #improv #DadJokes #pun #puns #humor #joke
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Remembering an #impromptu #DadJoke from two years ago...
I walked into my 11yr-old's room and laid down in his bed while he was at his desk.
Son: Papá, why are you lying in my bed?
Me: I'm not lying in your bed.
Son: Papá, you're literally lying in my bed right now!
Me: I'm NOT lying in your bed.
Son: Oh my gosh. You're lying in my bed... about lying in my bed!
Me: Bingo.