#joke — Public Fediverse posts
Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #joke, aggregated by home.social.
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CW: joke: what is space reporter Ulala's favorite candy?
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Katy Perry in "Astronaut Hall of Fame" when? 🤔
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Katy Perry in "Astronaut Hall of Fame" when? 🤔
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Katy Perry in "Astronaut Hall of Fame" when? 🤔
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Katy Perry in "Astronaut Hall of Fame" when? 🤔
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Katy Perry in "Astronaut Hall of Fame" when? 🤔
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A man has to give a urine sample for a check up (Long)
The doctor says “come here on an empty stomach and we’ll give you a bottle to pee in.
On the day of the exam, the man forgets about not eating and has eggs for breakfast.
He goes to the hospital, pees in the bottle, gives it to the doctor. He’s looks at it and says “I told you to come here on an empty stomach and you eat eggs? Come back in a week time ON AN EMPTY STOMACH”
He’s surprised by his doctor’s ability but slightly taken aback by his tone.Come next week he’s on his way to the hospital, on an empty stomach. He’s absolutely starving. Unfortunately, someone is selling delicious hot dogs just in front of the hospital door. He can’t resist, he buys one, wolfs it down, then goes to see the doctor.
Pees in the bottle, the doctor looks at the sample and edgily remarks “Was the hot dog nice? STOP WASTING MY TIME AND COME BACK NEXT WEEK ON AN EMPTY STOMACH”.
The man is mystified by the doctor’s strange gift but mostly angry at his terrible attitude.So come next week, he decides to pull a trick. He asks his wife to pee in a bottle , then pops his car bonnet, grabs the oil dipstick and dips it in the bottle too. “I want to see what that jerk says to that”
Goes to the hospital, grabs the bottle then secretly pours his own blend in it.
Gives it to the doctor, who glances at it, then looks closer, then against the window.
He finally says “Hm. This is not a good sign. Your wife is two months pregnant by your brother Steve and your 1989 Accord’s second cylinder is about to fail” -
A man has to give a urine sample for a check up (Long)
The doctor says “come here on an empty stomach and we’ll give you a bottle to pee in.
On the day of the exam, the man forgets about not eating and has eggs for breakfast.
He goes to the hospital, pees in the bottle, gives it to the doctor. He’s looks at it and says “I told you to come here on an empty stomach and you eat eggs? Come back in a week time ON AN EMPTY STOMACH”
He’s surprised by his doctor’s ability but slightly taken aback by his tone.Come next week he’s on his way to the hospital, on an empty stomach. He’s absolutely starving. Unfortunately, someone is selling delicious hot dogs just in front of the hospital door. He can’t resist, he buys one, wolfs it down, then goes to see the doctor.
Pees in the bottle, the doctor looks at the sample and edgily remarks “Was the hot dog nice? STOP WASTING MY TIME AND COME BACK NEXT WEEK ON AN EMPTY STOMACH”.
The man is mystified by the doctor’s strange gift but mostly angry at his terrible attitude.So come next week, he decides to pull a trick. He asks his wife to pee in a bottle , then pops his car bonnet, grabs the oil dipstick and dips it in the bottle too. “I want to see what that jerk says to that”
Goes to the hospital, grabs the bottle then secretly pours his own blend in it.
Gives it to the doctor, who glances at it, then looks closer, then against the window.
He finally says “Hm. This is not a good sign. Your wife is two months pregnant by your brother Steve and your 1989 Accord’s second cylinder is about to fail” -
A man has to give a urine sample for a check up (Long)
The doctor says “come here on an empty stomach and we’ll give you a bottle to pee in.
On the day of the exam, the man forgets about not eating and has eggs for breakfast.
He goes to the hospital, pees in the bottle, gives it to the doctor. He’s looks at it and says “I told you to come here on an empty stomach and you eat eggs? Come back in a week time ON AN EMPTY STOMACH”
He’s surprised by his doctor’s ability but slightly taken aback by his tone.Come next week he’s on his way to the hospital, on an empty stomach. He’s absolutely starving. Unfortunately, someone is selling delicious hot dogs just in front of the hospital door. He can’t resist, he buys one, wolfs it down, then goes to see the doctor.
Pees in the bottle, the doctor looks at the sample and edgily remarks “Was the hot dog nice? STOP WASTING MY TIME AND COME BACK NEXT WEEK ON AN EMPTY STOMACH”.
The man is mystified by the doctor’s strange gift but mostly angry at his terrible attitude.So come next week, he decides to pull a trick. He asks his wife to pee in a bottle , then pops his car bonnet, grabs the oil dipstick and dips it in the bottle too. “I want to see what that jerk says to that”
Goes to the hospital, grabs the bottle then secretly pours his own blend in it.
Gives it to the doctor, who glances at it, then looks closer, then against the window.
He finally says “Hm. This is not a good sign. Your wife is two months pregnant by your brother Steve and your 1989 Accord’s second cylinder is about to fail” -
A man has to give a urine sample for a check up (Long)
The doctor says “come here on an empty stomach and we’ll give you a bottle to pee in.
On the day of the exam, the man forgets about not eating and has eggs for breakfast.
He goes to the hospital, pees in the bottle, gives it to the doctor. He’s looks at it and says “I told you to come here on an empty stomach and you eat eggs? Come back in a week time ON AN EMPTY STOMACH”
He’s surprised by his doctor’s ability but slightly taken aback by his tone.Come next week he’s on his way to the hospital, on an empty stomach. He’s absolutely starving. Unfortunately, someone is selling delicious hot dogs just in front of the hospital door. He can’t resist, he buys one, wolfs it down, then goes to see the doctor.
Pees in the bottle, the doctor looks at the sample and edgily remarks “Was the hot dog nice? STOP WASTING MY TIME AND COME BACK NEXT WEEK ON AN EMPTY STOMACH”.
The man is mystified by the doctor’s strange gift but mostly angry at his terrible attitude.So come next week, he decides to pull a trick. He asks his wife to pee in a bottle , then pops his car bonnet, grabs the oil dipstick and dips it in the bottle too. “I want to see what that jerk says to that”
Goes to the hospital, grabs the bottle then secretly pours his own blend in it.
Gives it to the doctor, who glances at it, then looks closer, then against the window.
He finally says “Hm. This is not a good sign. Your wife is two months pregnant by your brother Steve and your 1989 Accord’s second cylinder is about to fail” -
A man has to give a urine sample for a check up (Long)
The doctor says “come here on an empty stomach and we’ll give you a bottle to pee in.
On the day of the exam, the man forgets about not eating and has eggs for breakfast.
He goes to the hospital, pees in the bottle, gives it to the doctor. He’s looks at it and says “I told you to come here on an empty stomach and you eat eggs? Come back in a week time ON AN EMPTY STOMACH”
He’s surprised by his doctor’s ability but slightly taken aback by his tone.Come next week he’s on his way to the hospital, on an empty stomach. He’s absolutely starving. Unfortunately, someone is selling delicious hot dogs just in front of the hospital door. He can’t resist, he buys one, wolfs it down, then goes to see the doctor.
Pees in the bottle, the doctor looks at the sample and edgily remarks “Was the hot dog nice? STOP WASTING MY TIME AND COME BACK NEXT WEEK ON AN EMPTY STOMACH”.
The man is mystified by the doctor’s strange gift but mostly angry at his terrible attitude.So come next week, he decides to pull a trick. He asks his wife to pee in a bottle , then pops his car bonnet, grabs the oil dipstick and dips it in the bottle too. “I want to see what that jerk says to that”
Goes to the hospital, grabs the bottle then secretly pours his own blend in it.
Gives it to the doctor, who glances at it, then looks closer, then against the window.
He finally says “Hm. This is not a good sign. Your wife is two months pregnant by your brother Steve and your 1989 Accord’s second cylinder is about to fail” -
Can we all stop Mocking RFK Jr's voice please... it's a condition :'(
You wouldn't laugh at an unvaccinated kid with measles...
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Can we all stop Mocking RFK Jr's voice please... it's a condition :'(
You wouldn't laugh at an unvaccinated kid with measles...
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Can we all stop Mocking RFK Jr's voice please... it's a condition :'(
You wouldn't laugh at an unvaccinated kid with measles...
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Can we all stop Mocking RFK Jr's voice please... it's a condition :'(
You wouldn't laugh at an unvaccinated kid with measles...
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Can we all stop Mocking RFK Jr's voice please... it's a condition :'(
You wouldn't laugh at an unvaccinated kid with measles...
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CW: Note: Roman Bingo
If the Romans played bingo, do you think the callers would have used 'bingo lingo'?
- Legs two
- Growing up the wall, four
- Seagull in flight, five
- Long-nosed dead man, nineteen
- Pornography, thirty
- Use your tongue, fifty-nine
- Smiling in a blindfold, a hundred and one
Read more: https://danq.me/2026/05/22/roman-bingo/#note #bingo #game #games #joke #language #latin #romans #showerThoughts
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If the Romans played bingo, do you think the callers would have used 'bingo lingo'?
- Legs two
- Growing up the wall, four
- Seagull in flight, five
- Long-nosed dead man, nineteen
- Pornography, thirty
- Use your tongue, fifty-nine
- Smiling in a blindfold, a hundred and one#note #joke #language #game #games #bingo #romans #latin #showerThoughts
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If the Romans played bingo, do you think the callers would have used 'bingo lingo'?
- Legs two
- Growing up the wall, four
- Seagull in flight, five
- Long-nosed dead man, nineteen
- Pornography, thirty
- Use your tongue, fifty-nine
- Smiling in a blindfold, a hundred and one#note #joke #language #game #games #bingo #romans #latin #showerThoughts
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If the Romans played bingo, do you think the callers would have used 'bingo lingo'?
- Legs two
- Growing up the wall, four
- Seagull in flight, five
- Long-nosed dead man, nineteen
- Pornography, thirty
- Use your tongue, fifty-nine
- Smiling in a blindfold, a hundred and one#note #joke #language #game #games #bingo #romans #latin #showerThoughts
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If the Romans played bingo, do you think the callers would have used 'bingo lingo'?
- Legs two
- Growing up the wall, four
- Seagull in flight, five
- Long-nosed dead man, nineteen
- Pornography, thirty
- Use your tongue, fifty-nine
- Smiling in a blindfold, a hundred and one#note #joke #language #game #games #bingo #romans #latin #showerThoughts
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If the Romans played bingo, do you think the callers would have used 'bingo lingo'?
- Legs two
- Growing up the wall, four
- Seagull in flight, five
- Long-nosed dead man, nineteen
- Pornography, thirty
- Use your tongue, fifty-nine
- Smiling in a blindfold, a hundred and one#note #joke #language #game #games #bingo #romans #latin #showerThoughts
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