home.social

#turd — Public Fediverse posts

Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #turd, aggregated by home.social.

  1. poopsicle, a frozen turd

    Example of usage:

    "Can't you smell it? It is Spring, and all the poopsicles left behind by the dogs are perfuming the air."

    #poopsicle #poop #turd #Spring

  2. poopsicle, a frozen turd

    Example of usage:

    "Can't you smell it? It is Spring, and all the poopsicles left behind by the dogs are perfuming the air."

    #poopsicle #poop #turd #Spring

  3. poopsicle, a frozen turd

    Example of usage:

    "Can't you smell it? It is Spring, and all the poopsicles left behind by the dogs are perfuming the air."

    #poopsicle #poop #turd #Spring

  4. A surprise in every box.

    “Is this the Department of Formal Complaints?”

    “No, this is the Department of Informal Complaints.”

    “Oh, but the sign on the door says…”

    “I was joking. This, indeed, is the Department of Formal Complaints. There is no such thing as a Department of Informal Complaints. That would be bonkers.”

    “Ah. Well, I’d like to submit a formal complaint. Hmm… no, I wouldn’t *like* to submit it. ‘Like’ is the wrong word. I would be displeased to submit… That does not sound quite right either.”

    “You want to submit a formal complaint, right?”

    “That’s it.”

    “What is it about?”

    “Your boxes of cereal claim that there is a surprise in every box.”

    “Yes.”

    “Well, I opened my box, looked for the surprise, and found a turd.”

    “Go on.”

    “And it wasn’t just a turd, it was a third of turd.”

    “A turd of a turd? I find that hard to believe. Our turds do not produce other turds.”

    “No, not a turd of a turd. A third of a turd. How shall I put it? One over three of a turd.”

    “Oh, a third of a turd. Would you have liked a whole turd?”

    “We’re going astray here. What kind of a surprise is a turd?”

    “Well, were you surprised?”

    “Sure. I expected something like a toy, or some knick-knack.”

    “Okay, so the writing on the box is truthful. There was a surprise in your box.”

    “That’s your stance?”

    “Yes, I think you’re making a mountain out of a molehill.”

    “I see.”

    “This is the wrong department for such activity. You want the Department of Making Mountains Out of Molehills, next door.”

    “[Picks up phone and dials.]”

    “Who are you calling?”

    “The Department of Farcical Situations.”

    “Why?”

    “To report this situation!”

    #TheDailyIsotope #AutisticWriters #turd

    #AutisticWriters #TheDailyIsotope #turd
  5. A surprise in every box.

    “Is this the Department of Formal Complaints?”

    “No, this is the Department of Informal Complaints.”

    “Oh, but the sign on the door says…”

    “I was joking. This, indeed, is the Department of Formal Complaints. There is no such thing as a Department of Informal Complaints. That would be bonkers.”

    “Ah. Well, I’d like to submit a formal complaint. Hmm… no, I wouldn’t *like* to submit it. ‘Like’ is the wrong word. I would be displeased to submit… That does not sound quite right either.”

    “You want to submit a formal complaint, right?”

    “That’s it.”

    “What is it about?”

    “Your boxes of cereal claim that there is a surprise in every box.”

    “Yes.”

    “Well, I opened my box, looked for the surprise, and found a turd.”

    “Go on.”

    “And it wasn’t just a turd, it was a third of turd.”

    “A turd of a turd? I find that hard to believe. Our turds do not produce other turds.”

    “No, not a turd of a turd. A third of a turd. How shall I put it? One over three of a turd.”

    “Oh, a third of a turd. Would you have liked a whole turd?”

    “We’re going astray here. What kind of a surprise is a turd?”

    “Well, were you surprised?”

    “Sure. I expected something like a toy, or some knick-knack.”

    “Okay, so the writing on the box is truthful. There was a surprise in your box.”

    “That’s your stance?”

    “Yes, I think you’re making a mountain out of a molehill.”

    “I see.”

    “This is the wrong department for such activity. You want the Department of Making Mountains Out of Molehills, next door.”

    “[Picks up phone and dials.]”

    “Who are you calling?”

    “The Department of Farcical Situations.”

    “Why?”

    “To report this situation!”

    #TheDailyIsotope #AutisticWriters #turd

    #AutisticWriters #TheDailyIsotope #turd
  6. A surprise in every box.

    “Is this the Department of Formal Complaints?”

    “No, this is the Department of Informal Complaints.”

    “Oh, but the sign on the door says…”

    “I was joking. This, indeed, is the Department of Formal Complaints. There is no such thing as a Department of Informal Complaints. That would be bonkers.”

    “Ah. Well, I’d like to submit a formal complaint. Hmm… no, I wouldn’t *like* to submit it. ‘Like’ is the wrong word. I would be displeased to submit… That does not sound quite right either.”

    “You want to submit a formal complaint, right?”

    “That’s it.”

    “What is it about?”

    “Your boxes of cereal claim that there is a surprise in every box.”

    “Yes.”

    “Well, I opened my box, looked for the surprise, and found a turd.”

    “Go on.”

    “And it wasn’t just a turd, it was a third of turd.”

    “A turd of a turd? I find that hard to believe. Our turds do not produce other turds.”

    “No, not a turd of a turd. A third of a turd. How shall I put it? One over three of a turd.”

    “Oh, a third of a turd. Would you have liked a whole turd?”

    “We’re going astray here. What kind of a surprise is a turd?”

    “Well, were you surprised?”

    “Sure. I expected something like a toy, or some knick-knack.”

    “Okay, so the writing on the box is truthful. There was a surprise in your box.”

    “That’s your stance?”

    “Yes, I think you’re making a mountain out of a molehill.”

    “I see.”

    “This is the wrong department for such activity. You want the Department of Making Mountains Out of Molehills, next door.”

    “[Picks up phone and dials.]”

    “Who are you calling?”

    “The Department of Farcical Situations.”

    “Why?”

    “To report this situation!”

    #TheDailyIsotope #AutisticWriters #turd

    #AutisticWriters #TheDailyIsotope #turd
  7. I think the State of the Union, as performed now, is only useful in that it might provide some entertainment if the speaker shits his pants live on TV. Otherwise, I struggle to see the point.

    #uspol #stateOfTheUnion #trump #turd

  8. I think the State of the Union, as performed now, is only useful in that it might provide some entertainment if the speaker shits his pants live on TV. Otherwise, I struggle to see the point.

    #uspol #stateOfTheUnion #trump #turd

  9. I think the State of the Union, as performed now, is only useful in that it might provide some entertainment if the speaker shits his pants live on TV. Otherwise, I struggle to see the point.

    #uspol #stateOfTheUnion #trump #turd

  10. CW: Toilet humour.

    Nobody flush the toilet. I've called Guinness. Might have a new world record there.

    #poo #turd

  11. CW: Toilet humour.

    Nobody flush the toilet. I've called Guinness. Might have a new world record there.

    #poo #turd

  12. The #orange #asshole
    the same #turd who claimed to deserve a '#Nobel' for peace
    #trump !
    without the permission of the #American #Congress
    ordered a treacherous vile attack on the #State of #Venezuela
    >already happened<

    An absurd and absolutely insane and criminal act of war.

    Americans should be ashamed !

  13. The #orange #asshole
    the same #turd who claimed to deserve a '#Nobel' for peace
    #trump !
    without the permission of the #American #Congress
    ordered a treacherous vile attack on the #State of #Venezuela
    >already happened<

    An absurd and absolutely insane and criminal act of war.

    Americans should be ashamed !

  14. The #orange #asshole
    the same #turd who claimed to deserve a '#Nobel' for peace
    #trump !
    without the permission of the #American #Congress
    ordered a treacherous vile attack on the #State of #Venezuela
    >already happened<

    An absurd and absolutely insane and criminal act of war.

    Americans should be ashamed !

  15. The #orange #asshole
    the same #turd who claimed to deserve a '#Nobel' for peace
    #trump !
    without the permission of the #American #Congress
    ordered a treacherous vile attack on the #State of #Venezuela
    >already happened<

    An absurd and absolutely insane and criminal act of war.

    Americans should be ashamed !

  16. The Pixies define #Lugo, in Galicia, Spain:

    Gigantic,
    Gigantic,
    Gigantic,
    A big, big #turd!

  17. I solved my Baofeng UV-5R Mini problem - for good!

    (Boy, was that shitty software) #baofeng #mini #turd

  18. I solved my Baofeng UV-5R Mini problem - for good!

    (Boy, was that shitty software) #baofeng #mini #turd

  19. I solved my Baofeng UV-5R Mini problem - for good!

    (Boy, was that shitty software) #baofeng #mini #turd

  20. I solved my Baofeng UV-5R Mini problem - for good!

    (Boy, was that shitty software) #baofeng #mini #turd

  21. @randahl

    Caption: "Why am I standing here next to an orange turd?"

    #turd

  22. @randahl

    Caption: "Why am I standing here next to an orange turd?"

    #turd

  23. @randahl

    Caption: "Why am I standing here next to an orange turd?"

    #turd

  24. @randahl

    Caption: "Why am I standing here next to an orange turd?"

    #turd

  25. @SteveClough Well put. 👍 ✊ I've refrained from commenting on #tRump and #NoKings because sadly I too am stuck on #plagueisland and we've problems of our own #reform #fascist #autocratic #king & a real one in #chucky the #turd