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#pickuplines — Public Fediverse posts

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  1. Boost for reach please.
    As someone who is ND and doesn't personally use pickup lines, I'm curious-do *you* use them? Share the best(or worst)pickup lines you've ever heard or used.

    #pickuplines #boostforreach

  2. CW: Nsfw pick up line

    Hey baby you turn my software into hardware ;)

    But like they just using a virtual machine... meaninf they literally are just simulating hardware.

    #pickuplines #pickupline

  3. Hey Babe, you're checkin' all my boxes. Now let's check yours. #VFA #PickupLines

    votefromabroad.org

  4. Saw this funny shirt while out and about today...

    The pickup line writes itself....

    #tshirt #pickuplines

  5. "Hi! I'd like to buy you a drink and make you flush."

    "Okay, for the drink, but you want to make me flush... like a toilet?"

    "Oh. I meant blush. I messed up badly, didn't I? I suck at pickup lines."

    "It's okay."

    "I better take a Xanax."

    "Here's some water."

    "Thanks." [Takes a pill, looks at the bottle.] "Oh, no..."

    "What is it?"

    "I should have checked carefully beforehand. This is not Xanax. This is a laxative. I'm going to go to the bathroom. Maybe you'd like to come with me?"

    "Er... to do what? Hold a conference while you're on the throne?"

    "That was a stupid idea. It was nice meeting you."

    #flush #blush #PickupLines #Xanax #laxative

  6. "Hello, beautiful! 😏 I was wondering, does the carpet match the drapes? 😉 "

    "Does the idiot match the words? 😁 "

    "What? 🤔 "

    "Exactly. :madjoy: "

    #dating #stupid #PickupLines

  7. CW: Bad pick up line (very bad).

    Hey baby are you Mediterranean bread?

    Cause I want to focaccia ;)

    #pickupline #pickuplines #flirts #flirt

  8. Seen in a dating profile:

    "Are you a Wi-Fi router? Because I'm feeling a connection."

    🙄

    Great line, there, bud! You might have guessed that guy was a cishet man.

    #dating #DatingProfile #PickupLines

  9. CW: Pickup line but like poetic

    Hey girl do you have a sextant?.... Cuz I got lost in the ocean of your eyes.

    😍😘

    #pickupline #pickuplines #flirt #flirty

  10. Ich sollte eine Deutsche sein. Als ich früher in Amerika Deutsch gelernt habe, habe ich das Wort Liebchen selbst entwickelt. Heute morgen habe ich die klassiche Deutsche Pickup Line auch selbst entwickelt. Genauso wie sie Deutsche nutzen.

    Ich: Bist du die Haupstadt von Rheinland-Pfalz?

    @thatfrisiangirlish: Oh No

    Ich: Weil ich dich Mainz machen will.

    Sie:
    🤦‍♀️

    Ich: Gibt es diese Anmache schon in Deutsch?

    Sie: Ja, leider

    Deutsche Integration? Wer braucht es. Ich bin schon zu Deutsch.

    #immigrantlife #Germany #pickuplines

  11. Hey baby are you a recurring nightmare?

    Cuz you take my breath away 😏 ... and make me question my psychology.

    #pickupline #pickuplines

  12. Number 71 on KNHC's Top 89 Hit Election of 2023...

    "Chill Like That" by Sunday Scaries & PiCKUPLiNES

    To be honest, I'm not impressed by this one.

    #Music, #KNHC, #HitElection, #SundayScaries, #Pickuplines

  13. What's the worst pick-up line you've heard?

    I just heard "I'm not a dentist, but I'd love to give you a filling!"

    #PickUp #PickUpLines #PickUpLine #dating #romance #relationship #Funny

  14. “You see, I’m smart. The smartest president the world has ever seen. So, so smart. So very smart. This golf course is tax-free. How? Because I’m smart. I buried one of my wives over there and now the golf course is tax-free. How smart is that? No, don’t answer, I’ll tell you - it’s very, very smart.”

    “Do you like shopping? I know a store off of Central Park. Nice fitting rooms.”

    #dolt45 #tangerinepalpatine #trump #pickuplines

  15. Girl, do you preserve lines and parallelism but not necessarily Eclidian distances and angles? Cuz ur looking affine 🥵 :doge_horny_jail:

    #math #PickUpLines #shitpost

  16. "Hey, baby, are we in The Matrix, because you are The One!"

    "Oh, my gosh!" I laughed. "Really?"

    "Yes."

    I suddenly found myself staring down the barrel of a gun.

    "Oh, SHIT!"

    #PickupLines #BadPickupLines #TheMatrix #TootFic #SmallStories #MicroFiction

  17. CW: The dog dies.

    "I want you to come at me like I killed your dog."

    #JohnWick #PickupLines