#thingsitoldthetelemarketer — Public Fediverse posts
Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #thingsitoldthetelemarketer, aggregated by home.social.
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#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer i juist dail 9 on my phone. And the number gets blackisted on my #asterisk voip server. The current and future calls are redirected to my #homeassistant, which picks up the phone. Tells the caller that the number is blacklisted. Gives a quote of the day and gives an option to file a complaint at my voicemail.
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#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer i juist dail 9 on my phone. And the number gets blackisted on my #asterisk voip server. The current and future calls are redirected to my #homeassistant, which picks up the phone. Tells the caller that the number is blacklisted. Gives a quote of the day and gives an option to file a complaint at my voicemail.
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#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer i juist dail 9 on my phone. And the number gets blackisted on my #asterisk voip server. The current and future calls are redirected to my #homeassistant, which picks up the phone. Tells the caller that the number is blacklisted. Gives a quote of the day and gives an option to file a complaint at my voicemail.
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What kind of house do you want?... How am I suppose to get you a great house? ... What do you want from ME? ... No, I don't know anything about Audrey or her awesome house.
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What kind of house do you want?... How am I suppose to get you a great house? ... What do you want from ME? ... No, I don't know anything about Audrey or her awesome house.
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Me (in a whispered voice): “How do you get blood out of the carpet. I mean…a LOT of blood?”
Me: “No, you can’t speak to my husband. He’s not permitted to leave the basement. We haven’t seen him in years.”
Me: “Sorry, we’re in the middle of our breakfast (lunch, dinner). Why don’t you give me your home number and I’ll call you back after we’ve finished. Oh, you can’t give me your home #? Then why are you calling mine?”
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Me (in a whispered voice): “How do you get blood out of the carpet. I mean…a LOT of blood?”
Me: “No, you can’t speak to my husband. He’s not permitted to leave the basement. We haven’t seen him in years.”
Me: “Sorry, we’re in the middle of our breakfast (lunch, dinner). Why don’t you give me your home number and I’ll call you back after we’ve finished. Oh, you can’t give me your home #? Then why are you calling mine?”
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Me (in a whispered voice): “How do you get blood out of the carpet. I mean…a LOT of blood?”
Me: “No, you can’t speak to my husband. He’s not permitted to leave the basement. We haven’t seen him in years.”
Me: “Sorry, we’re in the middle of our breakfast (lunch, dinner). Why don’t you give me your home number and I’ll call you back after we’ve finished. Oh, you can’t give me your home #? Then why are you calling mine?”
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Me (in a whispered voice): “How do you get blood out of the carpet. I mean…a LOT of blood?”
Me: “No, you can’t speak to my husband. He’s not permitted to leave the basement. We haven’t seen him in years.”
Me: “Sorry, we’re in the middle of our breakfast (lunch, dinner). Why don’t you give me your home number and I’ll call you back after we’ve finished. Oh, you can’t give me your home #? Then why are you calling mine?”
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Me (in a whispered voice): “How do you get blood out of the carpet. I mean…a LOT of blood?”
Me: “No, you can’t speak to my husband. He’s not permitted to leave the basement. We haven’t seen him in years.”
Me: “Sorry, we’re in the middle of our breakfast (lunch, dinner). Why don’t you give me your home number and I’ll call you back after we’ve finished. Oh, you can’t give me your home #? Then why are you calling mine?”
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Current #trending #tags on #Fediverse
#Photomonday 1.648 people
#Fotomontag 1.482 people
#brazil 712 people
#peoplefarming 533 people
#monday 434 people
#mondog 430 people
#thingsitoldthetelemarketer 397 people
#Sharrows 297 people
#mondaymotivation 291 people
#FotoMontag 267 people
📈 Boost 😉 -
Current #trending #tags on #Fediverse
#Photomonday 1.648 people
#Fotomontag 1.482 people
#brazil 712 people
#peoplefarming 533 people
#monday 434 people
#mondog 430 people
#thingsitoldthetelemarketer 397 people
#Sharrows 297 people
#mondaymotivation 291 people
#FotoMontag 267 people
📈 Boost 😉 -
Current #trending #tags on #Fediverse
#Photomonday 1.648 people
#Fotomontag 1.482 people
#brazil 712 people
#peoplefarming 533 people
#monday 434 people
#mondog 430 people
#thingsitoldthetelemarketer 397 people
#Sharrows 297 people
#mondaymotivation 291 people
#FotoMontag 267 people
📈 Boost 😉 -
Current #trending #tags on #Fediverse
#Photomonday 1.648 people
#Fotomontag 1.482 people
#brazil 712 people
#peoplefarming 533 people
#monday 434 people
#mondog 430 people
#thingsitoldthetelemarketer 397 people
#Sharrows 297 people
#mondaymotivation 291 people
#FotoMontag 267 people
📈 Boost 😉 -
Current #trending #tags on #Fediverse
#Photomonday 1.648 people
#Fotomontag 1.482 people
#brazil 712 people
#peoplefarming 533 people
#monday 434 people
#mondog 430 people
#thingsitoldthetelemarketer 397 people
#Sharrows 297 people
#mondaymotivation 291 people
#FotoMontag 267 people
📈 Boost 😉 -
Things I Told the Telemarketer
"So, that means George Bush ISN'T married to his mother?"
"Alright I'm POSITIVE you're lying!"
"Sophia please. Our savior would not be caught dead in that outfit."
"Sometimes life just isn't fair, kiddo."
"My mother's a lawyer, threaten me again and I'll own your house."
"I'm not in. Leave a message after the beep. BEEP!"
"Hi, it's me, Stan."
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Things I Told the Telemarketer
"So, that means George Bush ISN'T married to his mother?"
"Alright I'm POSITIVE you're lying!"
"Sophia please. Our savior would not be caught dead in that outfit."
"Sometimes life just isn't fair, kiddo."
"My mother's a lawyer, threaten me again and I'll own your house."
"I'm not in. Leave a message after the beep. BEEP!"
"Hi, it's me, Stan."
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True story:
My cousin's husband answered the phone thinking it was a telemarketer: "Happy Harry's Whorehouse. Our policy - the customer always comes first."
It was the pastor of his church calling.
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Caller (East Indian accent): Hello, I'm from the government.
Me: Really? Which one? (Municipal? County? State? Federal?)
Caller: I'm from the government.
Me: Which one?
Caller: Fuck you! Hangs up.
Me: Well, I guess he wasn't from the government.
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Caller (East Indian accent): Hello, I'm from the government.
Me: Really? Which one? (Municipal? County? State? Federal?)
Caller: I'm from the government.
Me: Which one?
Caller: Fuck you! Hangs up.
Me: Well, I guess he wasn't from the government.
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Caller (East Indian accent): Hello, I'm from the government.
Me: Really? Which one? (Municipal? County? State? Federal?)
Caller: I'm from the government.
Me: Which one?
Caller: Fuck you! Hangs up.
Me: Well, I guess he wasn't from the government.
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Caller (East Indian accent): Hello, I'm from the government.
Me: Really? Which one? (Municipal? County? State? Federal?)
Caller: I'm from the government.
Me: Which one?
Caller: Fuck you! Hangs up.
Me: Well, I guess he wasn't from the government.
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Caller (East Indian accent): Hello, I'm from the government.
Me: Really? Which one? (Municipal? County? State? Federal?)
Caller: I'm from the government.
Me: Which one?
Caller: Fuck you! Hangs up.
Me: Well, I guess he wasn't from the government.
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#thingsitoldthetelemarketer Did you know #Christ #died for your #sins?
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#thingsitoldthetelemarketer Did you know #Christ #died for your #sins?
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#thingsitoldthetelemarketer Did you know #Christ #died for your #sins?
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"It's done. Send the cleanup crew."
#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer -
"It's done. Send the cleanup crew."
#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer -
"It's done. Send the cleanup crew."
#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer -
"It's done. Send the cleanup crew."
#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer -
"It's done. Send the cleanup crew."
#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer -
Sorry, I spent all my money on streaming services
#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer #HashtagGames
#Streaming #Netflix #HBOMax #DisneyPlus #Peacock #ParamountPlus
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Sorry, I spent all my money on streaming services
#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer #HashtagGames
#Streaming #Netflix #HBOMax #DisneyPlus #Peacock #ParamountPlus
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Sorry, I spent all my money on streaming services
#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer #HashtagGames
#Streaming #Netflix #HBOMax #DisneyPlus #Peacock #ParamountPlus
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Sorry, I spent all my money on streaming services
#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer #HashtagGames
#Streaming #Netflix #HBOMax #DisneyPlus #Peacock #ParamountPlus
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Sorry, I spent all my money on streaming services
#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer #HashtagGames
#Streaming #Netflix #HBOMax #DisneyPlus #Peacock #ParamountPlus
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Go to my Start menu? Is that the thing with the Penguin on it?
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Go to my Start menu? Is that the thing with the Penguin on it?
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#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer She’s not here but she can be reached at 867-5309.
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#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer She’s not here but she can be reached at 867-5309.
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#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer She’s not here but she can be reached at 867-5309.
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#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer She’s not here but she can be reached at 867-5309.
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#ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer She’s not here but she can be reached at 867-5309.
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Hello, Psychic Hotline. I knew you’d call.
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Hello, Psychic Hotline. I knew you’d call.
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Hello, Psychic Hotline. I knew you’d call.
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Hello, Psychic Hotline. I knew you’d call.
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Hello, Psychic Hotline. I knew you’d call.
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#thingsitoldthetelemarketer not me but someone I know
"Hi, I'm retired, this is a residential number, goodbye"
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#thingsitoldthetelemarketer not me but someone I know
"Hi, I'm retired, this is a residential number, goodbye"
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#thingsitoldthetelemarketer not me but someone I know
"Hi, I'm retired, this is a residential number, goodbye"
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Too much fun not to share #thingsitoldthetelemarketer
* Me to Car Warranty scam: What? What happened to my car, I can't talk I need to check on my car
* Me to Solar Panel sales me: My psychic told me you'd be calling me, when he said I'd get a whole solar system I thought he meant planets. -
Too much fun not to share #thingsitoldthetelemarketer
* Me to Car Warranty scam: What? What happened to my car, I can't talk I need to check on my car
* Me to Solar Panel sales me: My psychic told me you'd be calling me, when he said I'd get a whole solar system I thought he meant planets. -
Too much fun not to share #thingsitoldthetelemarketer
* Me to Car Warranty scam: What? What happened to my car, I can't talk I need to check on my car
* Me to Solar Panel sales me: My psychic told me you'd be calling me, when he said I'd get a whole solar system I thought he meant planets. -
Too much fun not to share #thingsitoldthetelemarketer
* Me to Car Warranty scam: What? What happened to my car, I can't talk I need to check on my car
* Me to Solar Panel sales me: My psychic told me you'd be calling me, when he said I'd get a whole solar system I thought he meant planets. -
Here's my #ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer
telemarketer: "Hi I'm telemarketer"
me: *hangs up* -
Here's my #ThingsIToldTheTelemarketer
telemarketer: "Hi I'm telemarketer"
me: *hangs up*
