#vol62issue28 — Public Fediverse posts

Man Resents Home Run For Making Him Pause Eating, Clap

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/man-resents-home-run-for-making-him-pause-eating-clap/

Argentina Recognizes Goldfish As Sentient Beings With Rights

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/argentina-recognizes-goldfish-as-sentient-beings-with-rights/

AI: Myth Vs. Fact

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/ai-myth-vs-fact/

Fan Clearly Drowning In Diamondbacks Pool

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/fan-clearly-drowning-in-diamondbacks-pool/

AI: Myth Vs. Fact

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/ai-myth-vs-fact/

Argentina Recognizes Goldfish As Sentient Beings With Rights

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/argentina-recognizes-goldfish-as-sentient-beings-with-rights/

Mitch McConnell Clarifies Absence Due To Brief Planned Trip To Afterlife

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/mitch-mcconnell-clarifies-absence-due-to-brief-planned-trip-to-afterlife/

Man Who Bought ‘Odyssey’ Ticket Year Ahead Correctly Assumed He Wouldn’t Have Anything Going On

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/man-who-bought-odyssey-ticket-year-ahead-correctly-assumed-he-wouldnt-have-anything-going-on/

Bat-Wielding Christopher Nolan Confronts Man Using Bathroom During ‘The Odyssey’

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/bat-wielding-christopher-nolan-confronts-man-using-bathroom-during-the-odyssey/

Man Resents Home Run For Making Him Pause Eating, Clap

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/man-resents-home-run-for-making-him-pause-eating-clap/

Wife’s Muscular Sidepiece Challenged To Battle Of Wits

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/wifes-muscular-sidepiece-challenged-to-battle-of-wits/

‘Hunt For Gollum’ Director Andy Serkis Defends Film’s All–Andy Serkis Cast

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/hunt-for-gollum-director-andy-serkis-defends-films-all-andy-serkis-cast/

Female Supreme Court Justices Formally Request Protection From Brett Kavanaugh

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/female-supreme-court-justices-formally-request-protection-from-brett-kavanaugh/

Female Supreme Court Justices Formally Request Protection From Brett Kavanaugh

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/female-supreme-court-justices-formally-request-protection-from-brett-kavanaugh/

Mom’s Remembrance Of Sam Neill Takes Lewd Turn

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/moms-remembrance-of-sam-neill-takes-lewd-turn/

U.S. Military To Test Troops’ Testosterone Levels

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/u-s-military-to-test-troops-testosterone-levels/

Cyclosporiasis Outbreak Linked To Ancient Evil Corrupting The 7 Sacred Diarrhea Crystals

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/cyclosporiasis-outbreak-linked-to-ancient-evil-corrupting-the-7-sacred-diarrhea-crystals/

What To Know About Cyclosporiasis

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/what-to-know-about-cyclosporiasis/

What To Know About Cyclosporiasis

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/what-to-know-about-cyclosporiasis/

Public Begs Mitch McConnell To Stop Releasing Photos Of Himself

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/public-begs-mitch-mcconnell-to-stop-releasing-photos-of-himself/

Public Begs Mitch McConnell To Stop Releasing Photos Of Himself

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/public-begs-mitch-mcconnell-to-stop-releasing-photos-of-himself/

Madonna Accused Of Pandering With New Song About Trying To Find Available Spot In Fire Island Share House

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/madonna-accused-of-pandering-with-new-song-about-trying-to-find-available-spot-in-fire-island-share-house/

Insisting Coworker Get To Point Somehow Slows Him Down

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/insisting-coworker-get-to-point-somehow-slows-him-down/

Madonna Accused Of Pandering With New Song About Trying To Find Available Spot In Fire Island Share House

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/madonna-accused-of-pandering-with-new-song-about-trying-to-find-available-spot-in-fire-island-share-house/

Riot Police Excitedly Crouch Behind Armored Vehicle Like Group Of 3-Year-Olds About To Perform Ballet

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/riot-police-excitedly-crouch-behind-armored-vehicle-like-group-of-3-year-olds-about-to-perform-ballet/

Rubio Vows To Dismantle International Criminal Court

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/rubio-vows-to-dismantle-international-criminal-court/

Barack Obama Pretends To Be Canadian While Traveling Abroad

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/barack-obama-pretends-to-be-canadian-while-traveling-abroad/

Study Finds Gen Z Telepaths Lack Attention Span To Read Even Single Mind

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/study-finds-gen-z-telepaths-lack-attention-span-to-read-even-single-mind/

Guy Violently Coughing On Bus Better Just Have Throat Cancer

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/guy-violently-coughing-on-bus-better-just-have-throat-cancer/

White House Hovering, Falling 10 Feet Off Ground In Sync With Melania Snoring

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/white-house-hovering-falling-10-feet-off-ground-in-sync-with-melania-snoring/

Guy Violently Coughing On Bus Better Just Have Throat Cancer

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/guy-violently-coughing-on-bus-better-just-have-throat-cancer/

Study Finds Gen Z Telepaths Lack Attention Span To Read Even Single Mind

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/study-finds-gen-z-telepaths-lack-attention-span-to-read-even-single-mind/

Barack Obama Pretends To Be Canadian While Traveling Abroad

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/barack-obama-pretends-to-be-canadian-while-traveling-abroad/

White House Hovering, Falling 10 Feet Off Ground In Sync With Melania Snoring

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/white-house-hovering-falling-10-feet-off-ground-in-sync-with-melania-snoring/

White House Hovering, Falling 10 Feet Off Ground In Sync With Melania Snoring

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/white-house-hovering-falling-10-feet-off-ground-in-sync-with-melania-snoring/

White House Hovering, Falling 10 Feet Off Ground In Sync With Melania Snoring

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/white-house-hovering-falling-10-feet-off-ground-in-sync-with-melania-snoring/

Lindsey Graham’s Sister To Serve Remainder Of Term

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/lindsey-grahams-sister-to-serve-remainder-of-term/

Lindsey Graham’s Sister To Serve Remainder Of Term

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/lindsey-grahams-sister-to-serve-remainder-of-term/

Geologist Reunited With Beloved Rock He Studied 20 Years Ago

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/geologist-reunited-with-beloved-rock-he-studied-20-years-ago/

Kash Patel Calls For Public’s Help Using Computer

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/kash-patel-calls-for-publics-help-using-computer/

Sara Lee CEO Uploads Consciousness Into Loaf Of Bread

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/sara-lee-farm-ceo-uploads-consciousness-into-loaf-of-bread/

Sara Lee CEO Uploads Consciousness Into Loaf Of Bread

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/sara-lee-farm-ceo-uploads-consciousness-into-loaf-of-bread/

All Things Musk Pass

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/all-things-musk-pass/

Kash Patel Calls For Public’s Help Using Computer

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/kash-patel-calls-for-publics-help-using-computer/

Newborn Baby Can Already Tell Parents’ Genetics Not Going To Do Him Any Favors

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/newborn-baby-can-already-tell-parents-genetics-not-going-to-do-him-any-favors/

Geologist Reunited With Beloved Rock He Studied 20 Years Ago

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/geologist-reunited-with-beloved-rock-he-studied-20-years-ago/

Christopher Nolan Recalls Building Fully Practical Tom Holland For ‘The Odyssey’

https://fed.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/christopher-nolan-recalls-building-fully-practical-tom-holland-for-the-odyssey/

Paramedics Praised For Being Too Late To Save Lindsey Graham

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/paramedics-praised-for-being-too-late-to-save-lindsey-graham/

Boat Safety Tips

https://web.brid.gy/r/https://theonion.com/boat-safety-tips/