#asktrans — Public Fediverse posts
Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #asktrans, aggregated by home.social.
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I got some really helpful feedback on this topic from some friends earlier, but I thought I would ask here too.
Having only been fully out about a month, I feel extra self-conscious the more femme I present. (As an example, I have never worn a dress out anywhere.) I identified an underlying thought where I'm telling myself that I haven't "earned" that yet.
Any advise beyond ignore/push-through those thoughts?
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I have the opportunity, but not the obligation, to send an announcement of sorts to coworkers that my name has changed. I've directly told my team and others I work with on a daily basis. Is there a point to making a wider announcement?
I don't really want acknowledgement or extra interest, but I also don't want to be rude and have someone surprised by seeing it in Slack or in email first. This is a very LGBTQ+ supportive workplace.
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My voice therapist asked me to bring her some sample voices that appeal to me and I'm a bit stuck. I have a terrible time with names or faces, so while I can remember voices in my head and think "oh, that was nice", I can't put it to a name to find a recording to share with her. I'm not really sure even how to proceed. I know I want to go for a softer, gentler voice, and though I have a decent vocal range I'm going to wind up in alto territory. Does anybody have any suggestions?
#trans #AskTrans -
:repost_ok: i have questions for AMAB people on estrogen HRT! i'm non-binary, considering going on estrogen sometime in the future. i think i'd like it maybe
when did you start? what are some side effects you are getting/have gotten? have you stopped? would you have done anything differently? what would that be? why?
#transgender #transition #hrt #trans #transsexual #transfem #nonbinary #estrogen #hormonereplacementtherapy #asktrans #genderaffirmingcare #boost #boostswelcome sorry for hashtag spam i need reach for this -
CW: Seeking advice re: support groups and bad things happening
I am hoping someone in here might have advice. I am in a #transfem support group. When I engage in it, it helps me a lot.
The problem is, every time something really bad happens to someone in the group, it sends me spiralling for a bit. And by "really bad" I mean suicide, or people going missing, or etc. Every time I engage with the group for even months afterward, I have these awful waves of grief. It pushes me to disengage, because it feels like the only way to insulate myself from the pain. But distancing myself also hurts, because my support network is otherwise pretty small.
How do I find an emotional compromise here? I need the emotional crutch this group provides, but I also need to be able to recover when that crutch fails.
#AskTrans #AskTransFem #AskTransFedi #transfemme #transgender #AskTransMastodon #asktransgender
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CW: Electrolysis
Asking all #transfem / #transfemme people: can anyone tell me what it is like to get electrolysis done under sedation? I can see that it is possible, but I want to know if it works / is hellishly bad before I ask for an estimate
Otherwise I will likely continue seeing my clinic that just does numbing shots. It's just going very slowly because I don't get enough time off to do this often
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Has anybody renewed their passport using their deadname plus the gender flag of their choice? I think I understand what the process looks like but it'd help my autistic brain to hear someone's experience doing it.
Thank you!
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CW: HRT injection question
For those doing estradiol-valerate injections, how long do you keep using the same bottle? I was briefly on depo-estradiol and I remember the bottles saying to dispose after 28 days. I don't see a similar warning on the EV bottles, and obviously with TFG in office there may be a need to stock-pile so I want bottles to last as long as possible.
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CW: HRT Maths
I appear to have satisfied my HRT doc's expectations for T and E2 levels with my most recent check. I do daily spiro and 4mg of E once a week and after testing at peak it was very close to what the TransFemScience estimator predicts (but for monotherapy). The values are lower for that than what I've remember reading around here for suggested levels, though.
I know you should never ask the internet for medical advice, but I have plenty of EV left over when the bottle has expired, so I was thinking of doing 6mg a week instead of 4. That bumps the peak from around 300 pg/ml to about 450 and the trough from around 100 pg/ml to 175 in the estimator. I was lower than the simulator predicted so I think if I err, I should err a bit on the high side. It's legit hard to get .2ml in a 5ml syringe, so if I'm closer to .3 then I think I would avoid going below 100 at the trough.
Anybody have thoughts on this? "Just shut up and trust your doc" is totally acceptable, lol.
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CW: Looking for advice on girl-moding for the first time
For the last year I've done a lot of prep for being able to publicly transition. While I'm not ready to go full time yet, the desire to start going out in girl-mode is getting stronger by the day. Most of my shadow is zapped off. My hair is in a bob, 2 inches past my chin. I've done makeup enough to feel 75% confident in it. I've got clothes, shoes, and purses that fit and look decent (aiming for middle-aged soccer-mom here). The only thing I can think of that's missing is that calling my boobs an A cup would be overly generous, so I'm going to have to add some padding there. I have no idea how passable my voice is, but I've done what I can for now.
Am I missing anything? Did you have a check-list for going out when you started girl-moding publicly? I don't have any IRL support network so I'm dependent upon a mirror and I'll probably have to post some last minute selfies here for some confidence. Any other suggestions or ideas?
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Has anybody tried https://www.wantable.com? I'd like to find a service with a stylist that I can talk to about finding things that will work with the tall, broad-shouldered, but otherwise thin body shape that I have and won't be transphobic. I know some people use stylefix and I may try that or dailylook, but I like the way wantable works a bit more.
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CW: Injection Q
It looks like the draw needles (18g) aren't the Luer Lock style but the syringe and injection needles (25g) are. I hesitate to open a set just to see if they work together. It seems like when I'm ready to do an injection I can open both and if they don't work together then just use the 25g for both, though I know that's not optimal. Does anybody with experience think that plan is terrible?
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CW: Pronoun ponderings
I know that when I'm able to comfortably girl-mode I will want to use she/her pronouns, without a doubt. I'm considering switching to they/them right now, but I wonder if it's worth the bother. I'm curious what, if anything, other people did as they start to take hormones and transition. At work I don't have anything "officially" listed, so putting "they/them" would be a change and so part of my figures why bother. #trans #AskTrans
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I'm curious if anybody knows if gender affirming healthcare is readily accessible in Canada (websites seem to suggest most provinces are pretty progressive that way). I live in a part of the US where it's readily available, but my partner just suggested seriously trying to immigrate North. I had been a proponent of doing so for years, but coming out as trans really has the opportunity to really throw a monkey wrench into things. As much as I'd love to move I think that should at least temporarily take a back seat to the self-care I've denied myself. #AskTrans
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CW: surgery, orchiectomy
Should I get an orchiectomy 🤔
Would it help majorly if I've only just started HRT?
Kinda feels scary though, like, one day balls the next no balls.
but it would really help in terms of clothing and I imagine avoiding testosterone generation...
#AskTrans #Trans #Transgender -
honestly, i am terrified of the thought of going in to the womens bathroom. Like, what I mean by this is like, those initial few times where you're not sure how people will react... Don't get me wrong I can feel as fem as I want but the womens washroom is probably THE environment you'd want to be passing in, I feel... generally to avoid being ousted or attacked is my main concern.
Also, I just. I still feel even I could be 100% cis fem passing or whatever the criteria is, and I'd still feel it's wrong to be in there. We all gotta poop and pee it's just like, idk. This is why I prefer single stall individual toilet setups.
#Trans #AskTrans #AskTransgender -
When should I come out to my parents cause this is killing me to keep it inside lol
I thought maybe Father's Day and Mother's Day respectively. although one parent keeping it secret from the other is kind of... awkward.
the other option is my birthday but what if people get me masc-coded gifts and then feel bad about it... I can't have that.
"telling them when you're ready" just doesn't feel like an option anymore. sure I can wait until I literally can't hide say... the changes in my body, breast growth, etc... but it's painful emotionally to keep getting asked questions as if I was living a normal cis male societal life. or anything related like that
I also feel like if I tell one parent, I'm gonna have to tell everyone; that is the safest option. just one fell swoop and everyone can talk amongst ඞ themselves about how their son is gone and abouy their new daughter or how they're disowning or shunning me of the family now... :blobcatdead:
one kaboom to make everyone mad or happy :)but I could also tell a select few family members who I know are LGBT+ positive, especially relating to trans positivity and support.
I don't know how to tell my grandma, because she loves me as her "favorite grandson" of all the grandkids.... oof :(
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Should I seek out anti-acne cleansers for when I start taking #estrogen ?
Puberty Two: Return of the Acne?
#trans #asktrans #asktransgender -
Trans ladies,
How long did it take for your wardrobe to be primarily filled with women's clothing?
( Women's clothing meaning clothing generally sold and advertised towards cis women; but it can include transfem oriented clothing as well if you want. Whatever your definition wants to be! :blobcat: )
#Trans #Transjoy #AskTrans #AskTransgender -
i'm getting more and more anxious about my HRT consultation next month
because i keep feeling like i'm not trans or I don't want to be a woman or that it's somehow just horniness or a fetish
and also that I'll be ostracized by my biological parents and what my transition will do to them and likesomehow i keep questioning if i am trans or not and i just idk. #trans #asktrans
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Any transfemmes out there use a combo of E patches and progesterone pills? I've only kinda recently started using P and I'm trying to figure out the right balance. I was doing three 100mcg E patches before, and I think maybe that was helpful to compensate for not having P, but now I'm also on 200mg of that and I feel like the combo makes me super emotionally volatile.
Of course that's not a very cis-normal combo, usually they rise and fall opposite each other.
#asktrans ig? Boosts welcome.
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Transition question: is it advisable to gain more weight before starting HRT (estrogen), in order to promote larger breast growth?
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Unclockable.com tuck kit (or similar tucking kit) vs tucking underwear/panties...
Just trying to think of situations where one is better than the other, or vice versa
Or perhaps where a tuck kit is beneficial for a non tucking undie or swim pants, or for pants that you would not wear underwear with (but I can't visualize this tbh)...
