#jokeoftheday — Public Fediverse posts

#JokeOfTheDay
What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree.

#JokeOfTheDay
Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?
In case he got a hole in one.

#JokeOfTheDay
What do clouds wear under their raincoats? Thunderwear.

#JokeOfTheDay
What do clouds wear under their raincoats? Thunderwear.

#JokeOfTheDay
What do clouds wear under their raincoats? Thunderwear.

#JokeOfTheDay
What do clouds wear under their raincoats? Thunderwear.

#JokeOfTheDay
What do clouds wear under their raincoats? Thunderwear.

Whatever you do - always give 100%
…. unless you’re donating blood!

#jokeoftheday #exceptionmakestherule

Whatever you do - always give 100%
…. unless you’re donating blood!

#jokeoftheday #exceptionmakestherule

Whatever you do - always give 100%
…. unless you’re donating blood!

#jokeoftheday #exceptionmakestherule

Whatever you do - always give 100%
…. unless you’re donating blood!

#jokeoftheday #exceptionmakestherule

@MelissaBearTrix

White Christmas 🎄
================

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas,
just like the ones Christ used to know,
two millennia ago, in Judea,
where the reindeer played in the snow.

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas,
let's go chop down some pine trees,
light 'em up bright, with electricity,
to please our long dead deity,
while the world heats up, three degrees.

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas,
because the season is fantastic,
to buy gifts made of plastic,
to fill landfills, and the sea.
Let's all go on a shopping spree!

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas,
with all the third world girls and boys,
who wish for treats & toys,
and are told, that shit ain't free,
so don't milk our sentimentality.

I'm screaming about a white Christmas,
because it should be plain to see,
it's just a feelgood fantasy,
to push consumption, and white supremacy.

May your electric bills be high.
And may all your friends be white.

#Earth #Environment #Ecology #ClimateChange
#Consumerism #Colonialism #Capitalism
#Parody #Christmas
#Xmas #Lyrics #Song
#SongWriting #Comedy
#SocialJustice #Xtianity
#Christianity #Christ
#Jesus #MAGA #Holiday
#Joke #Jokes #Humor #Humour #Funny #Fun
#JokeOfTheDay

I have flabby thighs. Fortunately, my stomach covers them. #JokeOfTheDay #today Good Morning, Herd!! #SignOn

Why won't skeletons form a band? Because they don't have the guts! #today #JokeOftheDay #SignOn Have a great day! I love you! XOXOXOX!! @Tenor2JT

#SignOn Q: "What do you call fake spaghetti"? A: "An impasta"! #JokeOfTheDay #today Thanks to Classical FM 96.3, Toronto. @Tenor2JT and I will see ourselves out.