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#jokeoftheday — Public Fediverse posts

Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #jokeoftheday, aggregated by home.social.

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  1. #JokeOfTheDay
    What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing; it just waved.

  2. #JokeOfTheDay
    Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.

  3. #JokeOfTheDay
    I told my boss I needed a raise because three companies were after me.
    He asked which companies.
    I said, “The electric company, the water company, and the credit card company."

  4. #JokeOfTheDay
    What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree.

  5. #JokeOfTheDay
    What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese.

  6. #JokeOfTheDay
    My wife told me to stop acting like a flamingo.
    So I had to put my foot down.

  7. #JokeOfTheDay
    I used to think I was indecisive.
    Now I’m not so sure

  8. #JokeOfTheDay
    Why did the math book look worried? It had too many problems.

  9. #JokeOfTheDay
    What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.

  10. #JokeOfTheDay
    Why did the computer visit the doctor? It had a bad case of byte-sized bugs.

  11. #JokeOfTheDay
    Why did the calendar get promoted? It had a lot of dates.

  12. I used to be a fortune teller but only ever foretold bad winters! Turns out the crystal ball shop sold me a snow globe....
    #jokeoftheday #joke #boost #3dcandy

  13. I went out with this girl the t'other night and she wore a slinky number. She really looked good going down the stairs!
    #jokeoftheday #joke #slinky

  14. I knew a king who was 12 inches tall. Terrible king but great ruler!
    #jokeoftheday #boost #dadjoke

  15. My Grandma fell asleep in a restaurant the other day but it was OK because it was Nando's
    #jokeoftheday #boost #joke

  16. A friend of mine bought some laxatives at an auction! Before he knew it he was going once, going twice...
    #boost #jokeoftheday #joke

  17. I asked a librarian if she had a book about Pavlov's dog and Schrödinger's cat? She said it rang a bell, but she wasn't sure if it was there or not!

    ───────────────
    📅 February, 22nd
    😻 NATIONAL CAT DAY (Neko-no-kinenbi)
    🇯🇵 in Japan
    ───────────────

    #Nekonokinenbi #nationalcatday
    #FlachwitzFabrik #DadJoke #DadJokes #humour #humor #jokeoftheday

  18. What is another name for an Asian assassin?

    A Chinese takeout!
    #jokeoftheday #joke #boost