#hmhb — Public Fediverse posts
Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #hmhb, aggregated by home.social.
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Viral Cat in the Hat TikTok trend sparks fake videos and real fear - BBC News
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cwyqy29jn74o
In 2025, Half Man Half Biscuit sung that 'Horror clowns are dickheads'. The dickheads listened, but unfortunately, instead of ceasing to be dickheads they found a new way to be dickheads whilst avoiding HMHB scorn. #hmhb #dickheads -
Book number 31 took a very scenic route around The Oblong but has finally arrived
As always, I've read the last page first (is that normal?)
#hmhb #halfmanhalfbiscuit -
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“Fix it so she thinks of me”
There's a girl, I'm told, who rolls her eyes at the Gok Wan acolytes
Underneath her bed there lies a collection of ammonites
And she lives somewhere you wouldn't wanna get stuck
That can't be found in the Domesday Book
Cromwell's troops never billeted there
Dick Turpin never had Bess shoed where
This girl, I'm told, rolls her eyes at the Gok Wan acolytes
…
They should just brick Jim Beglin up with the Gok Wan acolytes
Brick him up
#hmhb #HalfManHalfBiscuit -
RE: https://mastodon.nz/@SimonCHulse/116757436019438861
Merciless despot with nothing to lose
In my Dick Quax running shoes -
Joy In Leeuwarden (We Are Ready)
Korfball’s coming to town
In your diary write it down
Roll on October, hip hip hooray!
Joy in Leeuwarden for sureSixteen teams are taking part
Sixteen camps of hope
Some contain top, top players
Some are just a crock of shit
#HMHB #HalfManHalfBiscuit -
RE: https://mastodon.social/@fesshole/116603329335984563
“Asparagus next left”
When the club-versus-country dispute arose
Small children were trampled in the exodus
We all knew someone at primary school
Who had a very powerful magnet
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I shot a man in Tesco just to watch him die
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"Bridge Street? Overhead railway Bridge Street? OH MY GOD! HELEN!"
(if you know, you know)
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/videos/c74rdkv80yjo?app-referrer=deep-link
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Mathematically Safe
May morning, hanging round a trapdoor
Saw a girl like I’ve never seen before
I wanna make her mathematically safe
Wanna keep her mathematically safe
Take her up where we’re mathematically safe
Gonna wake up mathematically safeMid table there’s nothing much on my fork
It’s alright though ‘cos I can go for my walk
Around Cartmel, mathematically safe
Ain’t no alarm bell, we’re mathematically safe
On a lilo, in a sea of alright
I’m a mongrel and I just won a dog fight
#hmhb #HalfManHalfBiscuit -
Instead of #HalfManHalfBiscuit, I got #FreddieMercury and a random deer.
Close enough #hmhb
(Freddie wasn't home) -
Time flies by when you're a driver of a train
Speeding out of Trumpton with a cargo of cocaine
I get high when I'm a pilot of a plane
Touching down in Camberwick, I'm stoned out of my brain.
Under bridges, over bridges, to our destination
Careful with that spliff, Eugene, it causes condensation.
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RE: https://mastodonapp.uk/@tobestewart/116017043645411901
Very #hmhb content right here
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Safe to say 1906 miles is the furthest I've travelled to see #halfmanhalfbiscuit #hmhb
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Today I discovered…
#hmhb lyrics in peer-reviewed papers
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“Twenty Four Hour Garage People”
I fancy I’ll open a stationer’s
Stock quaint notepads for weekend pagans
While you were out at The Rollright Stones
I came and set fire to your shed
‘Cos you probably work at an all-night garage
You probably work at an all-night garage
You probably work at an all-night garage
With Talk Radio on -
Biscuits, pizza and Scottish culture
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“Albert Hammond bootleg”
Talking to a girl on the south coast of France
She was on an 18-30 but I still took a chance
But on the last night ‘neath the stars of Marseilles
She said that Robin Askwith was funnyOh god how I longed for a dangerous wave
So I could surf myself towards an early grave
I would rather talk to plankton than to dance with you
I hope your plane back home’s a DC-10
#HMHB #HalfManHalfBiscuit -
Recorded #OnThisDay 26 years ago:
Half Man Half Biscuit - Peel Session 1999
The complete session recorded by Half Man Half Biscuit on 25 August 1999 for the John Peel show on BBC Radio 1 and broadcast on 9 September 1999.
Tracklist:
1. Uffington Wassail (2:19)
2. Gubba Look-alikes (5:55)
3. Bottleneck At Capel Curig (11:57)
4. Twenty Four Hour Garage People (15:07)https://vibracobra23.blogspot.com/2019/08/half-man-half-biscuit-peel-session-1999.html
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“Shit Arm, Bad Tattoo”
If you’re going to quote from the Book of Revelation
Don’t keep calling it the Book of Revelations
There’s no “s”, it’s the Book of Revelation
As revealed to St John the Divine
See also Mary Hopkin
She must despairYou’ve got a shit arm, and that’s a bad tattoo
