#halfmanhalfbiscuit — Public Fediverse posts
Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #halfmanhalfbiscuit, aggregated by home.social.
-
Joy In Leeuwarden (We Are Ready)
Korfball’s coming to town
In your diary write it down
Roll on October, hip hip hooray!
Joy in Leeuwarden for sureSixteen teams are taking part
Sixteen camps of hope
Some contain top, top players
Some are just a crock of shit
#HMHB #HalfManHalfBiscuit -
Joy In Leeuwarden (We Are Ready)
Korfball’s coming to town
In your diary write it down
Roll on October, hip hip hooray!
Joy in Leeuwarden for sureSixteen teams are taking part
Sixteen camps of hope
Some contain top, top players
Some are just a crock of shit
#HMHB #HalfManHalfBiscuit -
“Uffington Wassail”
Because you had a daughter, and chose to call her Rain
Because you didn’t indicate to go down Woodchurch Lane
Your Am-Dram class has been postponed indefinitely
Because the root of Jesse’s just turned up in glorious majestySinging Sealed Knot Society, let’s see you try and do this one:
Luton Town – Millwall, nineteen eighty-fiveHand me down my silver trumpet
Sound the revolution bell
There’s a Cher impersonator
Rising up in Israel -
RE: https://mastodon.social/@fesshole/116603329335984563
“Asparagus next left”
When the club-versus-country dispute arose
Small children were trampled in the exodus
We all knew someone at primary school
Who had a very powerful magnet
-
RE: https://mastodon.social/@fesshole/116603329335984563
“Asparagus next left”
When the club-versus-country dispute arose
Small children were trampled in the exodus
We all knew someone at primary school
Who had a very powerful magnet
-
I shot a man in Tesco just to watch him die
-
I shot a man in Tesco just to watch him die
-
"Bridge Street? Overhead railway Bridge Street? OH MY GOD! HELEN!"
(if you know, you know)
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/videos/c74rdkv80yjo?app-referrer=deep-link
-
"Bridge Street? Overhead railway Bridge Street? OH MY GOD! HELEN!"
(if you know, you know)
https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/videos/c74rdkv80yjo?app-referrer=deep-link
-
Hair Like Brian May Blues
I woke up about eleven with hair like Brian May
I woke up about eleven (oooh) with hair like Brian May
I’m supposed to be the hardest man on the estateI’m gonna go down to the river, the one that they call the Dee
I’m gonna go down to the river (oooh), that old snake they call the Dee
Lord you gotta let me drown so those ringlets they won’t seeOh I need this situation about as much as I need
The Armoury Show’s entire back catalogue -
Mathematically Safe
May morning, hanging round a trapdoor
Saw a girl like I’ve never seen before
I wanna make her mathematically safe
Wanna keep her mathematically safe
Take her up where we’re mathematically safe
Gonna wake up mathematically safeMid table there’s nothing much on my fork
It’s alright though ‘cos I can go for my walk
Around Cartmel, mathematically safe
Ain’t no alarm bell, we’re mathematically safe
On a lilo, in a sea of alright
I’m a mongrel and I just won a dog fight
#hmhb #HalfManHalfBiscuit -
Instead of #HalfManHalfBiscuit, I got #FreddieMercury and a random deer. Close enough #hmhb (Freddie wasn't home)
-
Instead of #HalfManHalfBiscuit, I got #FreddieMercury and a random deer.
Close enough #hmhb
(Freddie wasn't home) -
Instead of #HalfManHalfBiscuit, I got #FreddieMercury and a random deer.
Close enough #hmhb
(Freddie wasn't home) -
Time flies by when you're a driver of a train
Speeding out of Trumpton with a cargo of cocaine
I get high when I'm a pilot of a plane
Touching down in Camberwick, I'm stoned out of my brain.
Under bridges, over bridges, to our destination
Careful with that spliff, Eugene, it causes condensation.
-
Time flies by when you're a driver of a train
Speeding out of Trumpton with a cargo of cocaine
I get high when I'm a pilot of a plane
Touching down in Camberwick, I'm stoned out of my brain.
Under bridges, over bridges, to our destination
Careful with that spliff, Eugene, it causes condensation.
-
I’ve drank too much black coffee Read too much Bill Burroughs I’ve been a he, I’ve been a she A “maybe” and “who knows” I’ve had the CBGBs I’ve turkeyed way upstate So don’t you rock me, Daddio
Oh does your heroin lose its glamour on the washboard overnight? When your mother says “Don’t do it” do you crank it up in spite? Do you rob your brother’s Giro? Do you talk a load of shite? Does your heroin lose its glamour on the washboard overnight?
#hmhb #HalfManHalfBiscuit -
“What made Colombia famous”
What price your bluster
What price your smarm
I’ve seen body parts lying in biology labs
With far more charmOh, big truck, Innsbruck
King of the Hill
Cock-a-doodle-doo
What made Colombia famous
Has made a prick out of you -
Safe to say 1906 miles is the furthest I've travelled to see #halfmanhalfbiscuit #hmhb
-
Safe to say 1906 miles is the furthest I've travelled to see #halfmanhalfbiscuit #hmhb
-
Half Man Half Biscuit @ Project House - 14 Aug feat. Half Man Half Biscuit, Madame Claude
-
Name a #band with poorer professional success but a better #Wikipedia profile.
#HalfManHalfBiscuithttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Half_Man_Half_Biscuit?wprov=sfla1
-
Name a #band with poorer professional success but a better #Wikipedia profile.
#HalfManHalfBiscuithttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Half_Man_Half_Biscuit?wprov=sfla1
-
🇺🇦 #NowPlaying on #BBC6Music's #6MusicsIndieForever
Half Man Half Biscuit:
🎵 All I Want For Christmas Is A Dukla Prague Away Kithttps://open.spotify.com/track/5xB1t4lQyQyNey5CabsSZ7
(There are still 20 days until 🎄 #Christmas) -
🇺🇦 #NowPlaying on #BBC6Music's #6MusicsIndieForever
Half Man Half Biscuit:
🎵 All I Want For Christmas Is A Dukla Prague Away Kithttps://open.spotify.com/track/5xB1t4lQyQyNey5CabsSZ7
(There are still 20 days until 🎄 #Christmas) -
“It’s Cliched To Be Cynical At Christmas”
Now how did I guess
You were going to express
Your disdain at the crane
With the bright fairy lights
And you’d moan at the snow
‘Cos your car wouldn’t go
Oh it’s cliched
To be cynical
At ChristmasYou don’t have a tree
And your smile has a fee
All the same, here’s a card
For your boring facade
Jingle Bells, piney smells
All the boys and the girls
Say it’s cliched
To be cynical
At Christmas
Oh it’s cliched
To be cynical
At Christmas -
Good morning. This young lady was so pleased with her Half Man Half Biscuit Musical Map of Great Britain that she also brought the new Sardines poster. Now she’s telling her WhatsApp group all about it. They think she’s a bit bonkers, but, you know, that’s Abigail all over. They’ll discuss it further when she brings them over to the pub tonight. xx
https://www.edwardphilips.co.uk
#art #wallart #sardines #design #humor #halfmanhalfbiscuit #pub
-
Good morning. This young lady was so pleased with her Half Man Half Biscuit Musical Map of Great Britain that she also brought the new Sardines poster. Now she’s telling her WhatsApp group all about it. They think she’s a bit bonkers, but, you know, that’s Abigail all over. They’ll discuss it further when she brings them over to the pub tonight. xx
https://www.edwardphilips.co.uk
#art #wallart #sardines #design #humor #halfmanhalfbiscuit #pub
-
-
I’m pleased to announce that for the Half Man Half Biscuit fan who thinks they have everything,a new HMHB map of the UK has arrived with over 200 locations mentioned in their inimitable lyrics. Something for the weekend? Oh, yes, I think so. xx
#music #maps #wirral #halfmanhalfbiscuit #handmade #design #uk #punk #postpunk
-
I’m pleased to announce that for the Half Man Half Biscuit fan who thinks they have everything,a new HMHB map of the UK has arrived with over 200 locations mentioned in their inimitable lyrics. Something for the weekend? Oh, yes, I think so. xx
#music #maps #wirral #halfmanhalfbiscuit #handmade #design #uk #punk #postpunk
-
“Twenty Four Hour Garage People”
I fancy I’ll open a stationer’s
Stock quaint notepads for weekend pagans
While you were out at The Rollright Stones
I came and set fire to your shed
‘Cos you probably work at an all-night garage
You probably work at an all-night garage
You probably work at an all-night garage
With Talk Radio on -
“Twenty Four Hour Garage People”
I fancy I’ll open a stationer’s
Stock quaint notepads for weekend pagans
While you were out at The Rollright Stones
I came and set fire to your shed
‘Cos you probably work at an all-night garage
You probably work at an all-night garage
You probably work at an all-night garage
With Talk Radio on -
Biscuits, pizza and Scottish culture
-
“Albert Hammond bootleg”
Talking to a girl on the south coast of France
She was on an 18-30 but I still took a chance
But on the last night ‘neath the stars of Marseilles
She said that Robin Askwith was funnyOh god how I longed for a dangerous wave
So I could surf myself towards an early grave
I would rather talk to plankton than to dance with you
I hope your plane back home’s a DC-10
#HMHB #HalfManHalfBiscuit -
Recorded #OnThisDay 26 years ago:
Half Man Half Biscuit - Peel Session 1999
The complete session recorded by Half Man Half Biscuit on 25 August 1999 for the John Peel show on BBC Radio 1 and broadcast on 9 September 1999.
Tracklist:
1. Uffington Wassail (2:19)
2. Gubba Look-alikes (5:55)
3. Bottleneck At Capel Curig (11:57)
4. Twenty Four Hour Garage People (15:07)https://vibracobra23.blogspot.com/2019/08/half-man-half-biscuit-peel-session-1999.html
-
Recorded #OnThisDay 26 years ago:
Half Man Half Biscuit - Peel Session 1999
The complete session recorded by Half Man Half Biscuit on 25 August 1999 for the John Peel show on BBC Radio 1 and broadcast on 9 September 1999.
Tracklist:
1. Uffington Wassail (2:19)
2. Gubba Look-alikes (5:55)
3. Bottleneck At Capel Curig (11:57)
4. Twenty Four Hour Garage People (15:07)https://vibracobra23.blogspot.com/2019/08/half-man-half-biscuit-peel-session-1999.html
-
“Shit Arm, Bad Tattoo”
If you’re going to quote from the Book of Revelation
Don’t keep calling it the Book of Revelations
There’s no “s”, it’s the Book of Revelation
As revealed to St John the Divine
See also Mary Hopkin
She must despairYou’ve got a shit arm, and that’s a bad tattoo
-
“The referee’s alphabet”
K is for the kissing of the badge
How ridiculous that looks 6 months later when they’re at another club -
@fesshole As is so often the case, #HalfManHalfBiscuit have already satirised this. #HMHB
-
@fesshole As is so often the case, #HalfManHalfBiscuit have already satirised this. #HMHB
-
“Upon Westminster Bridge”
If Jesus came to Earth today
They’d crucify him straight away
Upon a cross of MDF
And they’d use No Need For NailsShip-shape farmhouse
Dry stone wall chart
Cash-back foot spa
Straight down Ladbrokes
Low cost school trip
Ramraid Oxfam
“Christ that sun’s hot”
Yes that’s right sirOh help me Mrs Medlicott
I don’t know what to do
I’ve only got three bullets
And there’s four of Motley Crue
#hmhb #HalfManHalfBiscuit -
“Horror Clowns Are Dickheads”
Horror Clowns are dickheads
You know it’s true
And if you’ve got a phobia of them
You’re a dickhead too
Don’t go worrying and don’t be wary
They have never been remotely scary
Hardly M.R. James
Hardly Edgar Allan Poe
Get a decent mob together
They don’t wanna know -
Trumpton Riots
🎶making plans to assassinate our autocratic mayor tonight🎶
-
Trumpton Riots
🎶making plans to assassinate our autocratic mayor tonight🎶
-
Time Flies By When You're The Driver of a Train
-
Time Flies By When You're The Driver of a Train
-
New Half Man Half Biscuit is always good news
And a new album next month
-
New Half Man Half Biscuit is always good news
And a new album next month
-
Very happy 16km today on #OffasDykePath finishing at https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bwlch_Penbarras
Loving the #Halfmanhalfbiscuit connection -
Very happy 16km today on #OffasDykePath finishing at https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bwlch_Penbarras
Loving the #Halfmanhalfbiscuit connection -
Is there a crossover between #Shriekback and #HalfManHalfBiscuit fans? They're a similar vintage, different styles of music but both using fairly complex lyrics full of cultural references. I love them both.
-
Is there a crossover between #Shriekback and #HalfManHalfBiscuit fans? They're a similar vintage, different styles of music but both using fairly complex lyrics full of cultural references. I love them both.
-
Recorded #OnThisDay 28 years ago:
Half Man Half Biscuit - Peel Session 1997
The complete session recorded by Half Man Half Biscuit on 12 January 1997 for the John Peel show on BBC Radio 1 and broadcast on 2 February 1997.
Tracklist:
1. Monmore Hare's Running (0:07)
2. Tonight Matthew I'm Going To Be With Jesus (3:31)
3. PRS Yearbook Quick The Drawbridge (7:04)
4. He Who Would Valium Take (9:55)http://vibracobra23.blogspot.com/2017/09/half-man-half-biscuit-peel-session-1997.html
-
This is the real England, not 'Britain', it's this song, this band and that city