#weirdfolks — Public Fediverse posts

#Journal of an over-exhausted Dutch AuDHD Pixy :pixy_party: (Monday, 31/08/2026).

Another broken night. I got some sleep though, but it wasn't the best, and it should have been longer. But, it is as it is, and I needed to make the best of it. This was going to be a long day, and I was already getting anxious about the talk with the coach in the morning. But, I got up, let out Koa, and we started our "day".

Koa got his food, I took my meds, and I got dressed. When Koa and I were ready, we headed to the couch. I got my tablet, and started writing a reply to a sweet friend's email. It took me a while to write my reply, and Koa started whining more, so I decided to take him out for a little walk. When we got back, I finished the email, and then made myself brekkie.

After brekkie, I got my laptop out, and started writing today's blog post. It was a simple one, but written from the heart. It wasn't difficult to write, and it felt good when it was finished. I started writing my journal Toot after that, when Koa let me know that he was ready to head out again for some walkies. So, like a good humom, I paused my writing, and took the dude out for his sniffs.

I wrote a bit more when we got home. After I had fixed a meal for the dude, and I had a snack, I wrote more on my journal toot. But the typing went slow, and I felt too tired and sore to keep going. I decided to just relax for now, allow my hands some rest, and hopefully I would be able to finish it later that day.

I tried to relax a little while watching some telly. But, apparently, Koa really needed more attention from me, so out we went for another walkies, When we got back, I started to fix some food. While the food was being prepped, bestie called me on her way to work. She'd texted me on Sunday, letting me know about the call. But my mind had been distracted with other things, and to be honest, I'd forgotten about it.

Bestie did most of the talking, while I did all of the eating. When she arrived at work, we hung up. I cleaned up my things, and whadda ya know? That little bugger wanted to go out, again! To think that, when he was younger, I had to lure him to the hallway to get his harness on. Now, it's him begging me again and again, to take him out for walkies.

We just got back, when our friend texted me that she was on our way to our place. Which was good news, as it meant that she would be early enough so we could discuss some things, before the coach would come. When she arrived, Koa was all excited, and he pretended that he'd not been taken out for walkies for ages! He was a poor dude, who never got any love and attention. Of course our friend knew better than that, but she still indulged Koa, and we went for another walk. She and I discussed how we'd try to get the important talk done together. Which was good, because I knew she would pick up the conversation whenever I struggled to keep talking. When we got back, I saw the coach's car parked already, but I didn't pay it any attention.

I was just cuddling on the couch with Koa, when the doorbell rang. As Koa got all excited, and put his paws everywhere, also in some painful parts, our friend decided to open the door, so I could catch my breath. The coach was rather surprised when someone else opened up, so I guess she knew something was happening... She asked how I was doing, and I started to tell about the shitty fucked up way she handled things last Monday, and how it hurt me, and damaged the trust that I'd put in her offer of helping me. When I was getting a bit too emotional, my friend took over, and started explaining why I felt like I did. The coach was very surprised, but I think that she did listen to us. She asked some questions, and my friend and I tried to answer as best as she could. I think she slowly started to realize that she had definitely messed up with how she treated me, and she seemed to understand why I was disappointed, angry, and hurt over how things had happened.

An hour or so later, she left after taking many notes, based on all we had explained to her. She had apologized, so that was something. I'm still not all back to trusting her, and I did honestly tell her that. This had been a big trigger for my cptsd, and it would take me quite a while to try to recover from this. After she left, our friend and I took Koa for a longer walk. Koa didn't mind another walk at all. 😇 She helped me with vacuuming before she went back home again. I had thanked her several times before she left, and later again in chat.

I felt exhausted. Short, bad, and broken nights for so long now and then all this stuff with the coach... 😔 I tried to relax a bit, before it was time to fix a meal for the dude. After he had finished, we watched some telly. Then, I got everything ready for bedtime, as I was so exhausted. But, I couldn't sleep just yet, as I had to wait for the GP to call about my meds. I had run out of them, so I needed the GP to prescribe me some new ones. Usually, she calls me early during the time scheduled for patient calls. When it was 15:30, and I still had not received the call, I got to the GP app, and I wrote a message there, as I was just getting too tired for a call, and I really needed to get the meds.

When I'd just given up on waiting, I put away my phone. I wanted to put away my Kobo a few minutes later, and then I saw the incoming call. I picked up, and had a chat with the GP. I told her all that I'd written in my message, which she told me she had seen. She agreed on everything, and would make sure that they'd get the meds to my mailbox. Hoping that it would go well this time around, I tried to finally get some sleep.

First, Koa got some attention. After going out, where he did nothing, we went back to bed. Koa got some kibble and water, and after that, he allowed me to sleep some. But, after a short time, he woke me up again. When he woke me the last time, it was time to get up and start our "day". Unfortunately, I had less than 6 hours of sleep, and it had been very broken. So, I felt dead when I got up...

Thanks to all for your kindness and support during my "journey through daily life" :bear_love: I really appreciate it :bear_hugs: as it helps me to keep going on bad/harder days! :bear_nuzzle:

:pixy_party: 💜 🍀 🐾

#PixysJourney
#WeirdFolks
#ActuallyAuDHD
#KoaKoolani

#Journal of a very tired and sore Dutch AuDHD Pixy :pixy_party: (Tuesday, 01/09/2026).

Thanks to the late call from the GP, and the time my body and brain needed after that, to be able to relax enough to fall asleep, it was a short night. And, it was a broken one as well, thanks to the dude. When he woke me up again, it was a good time, I just could have used a few more hours of sleep. Ah well, it was time to get up and start our "day".

Koa got his meal, and went to the garden to do his things. I went to the mailbox to get my meds, and found out that there was only one of the two meds that the GP and I had discussed. So, after taking my meds, the next thing I did was writing a message in the GP app, to ask what went wrong with the prescription. I was bummed that the meds had not all been delivered, and I was glad that I still had a few old ones that I could use in the meantime.

Koa and I got to the couch. I got my tablet, and started writing a reply to my sweet friend's email. Even though taking the splint off makes it a wee bit easier to type (and get a little bit of exercise in for my wrist), I'm still so slow, and it still takes more energy. But, I managed to finish the email, and then I got ready to take the dude out for a short walk.

After the walk, I fixed and ate some brekkie. I finished up today's blog post, so it was scheduled for a 7am publication. I started writing my journal Toot. I was halfway through when Koa wanted to go out again. We went for a short walk, and when we got back, I was able to finish the journal Toot. When it was uploaded to the usual places, I fixed a meal for Koa. While Koa enjoyed it, I was able to do some of my wrist exercises. I try to do them several times a day. But, due to my hypermobolity issues, when I try to make certain moves, it feels like some of my joints need to "unlock".

Sometimes, some of my joints will get "displaced" a bit. They usually don't dislocate all the way, and certain movements can make them "slide back" again. Many times, I can do this for myself, sometimes I need my physical therapist to help me out, as it's a "two handed job". And now, with two of my fingers, and one of the bones near my wrist, it feels like a little "knack" is needed, so it will "unlock", and be able to properly move again. But, due to the surgery, it's not allowed to put the pressure on the needed places, as it could cause serious damage, and cause issues with a proper healing. I know the joints are stiff from the casts and splints. I know the surgery caused some trauma in the area, that needs time (and some effort) to heal. But I also know how it feels when the little bones aren't properly placed, and need a little effort to be put back.

I'll need to discuss this with my hand therapists during my appointments next Friday. And, I wonder if they will take me seriously, or if they just say it's normal soreness from the surgery. I know the therapists I had after my previous hand surgery never really believed me when I'd pinpoint a certain issue I felt in my hand while doing the exercises. I wonder what they'll do this time around. Because I can't do the exercises properly as long as these three joints aren't working along... Fingers crossed 🤞🏻 for next Friday.

After some time, I fixed myself some food. I took Koa for another short walk. I promisef him the little longer one after bestie's call, when it would be light outside. I watched some telly, and then I had my call with my friend. 😊 When we hung up, I got my headphones and phone, and took Koa for the promised walk. The headphones brought me some Roxette music, and they made sure that my cap wouldn't be blown off by the wind.

When we got home again, I texted the neighbor about the little parcel for Koa, that had been delivered at her place last night. We picked it up when she said we could. 😊 I was very curious about Koa's reaction to the coffee wood chewing "toy". But, he took it from me, all excited, and he immediately started sinking his teefs in it. He was super happy with it, running around, even throwing it up in the air, nibbling here and there. As I have no experience with these wooden chewing things, I am keeping an eye on it, every time Koa is chewing on it. When it gets too small, and Koa may be thinking of inhaling the bit, it needs to be taken away from the dude before this may happen. But, I have no idea how fast the dude is going with his chewing, so yeah, a careful eye is very much needed.

Mum texted that she was on her way. So when I saw her car in the parking ou back, I told Koa to check the kitchen door window. He got all excited, jumping around with his coffee wood stick, and... He ran to the front low window, and got all disappointed that there was no one there. 😂 Until he heard something out back, and realized he had checked out the wrong window! 😂

After trying to jump over my mum, Koa settled back down again with his stick, and mum was able to enjoy a choco coffee. When mum was done, we took out Koa for a walk, before we headed to the car, to drive to Cuijk for my PT appointment. All went well, and we arrived safe and sound. We had to wait for a little while, and then we were called in.

The physio started with an echo of my right hip area. He had taken one several months ago. As the area started to hurt more again, but in a different way, I had asked him to do it again. Maybe the echo could locate the issue with the hip, and show us to a possible solution. After a little while, with my leg shaking a bit at times when the scanner put pressure on certain parts of my hip, the physio found the cause of the pain. But, unfortunately, there was no easy solution coming with the conclusion of the scan. 😔

I've had many hip surgeries, so the area has taken quite a bit of damage. When I got the big hematoma and edema after the last (emergency) surgery, it hurt so bad. The edema never fully recovered. And now, it seems that the remaining part got in between several tissue layers and tried to settle there. So it's in between the layers, and because the fluids cause more pressure against muscles and nerves... The PT didn't know about any (simple) ways of dealing with this, on how to get the fluids out, so it could be the next issue on my long list of "learn to deal with it until you die" list. 😭

We headed back home again. Mum took Koa to the grassy area for a pee, while I fixed his food. Mum headed home again, and Koa and I got ready for bed. For once, it didn't take me too long to doze off. But a little while later, I was awake again, as I was startled by a weird dream. Before I could fall asleep again, Koa wanted some attention. We got back to bed, and both dozed off again, until about 2½ hours later, Koa woke me up again. I was getting a bit desperate, as I really needed some longer sleep... When we went back to bed again, I asked Koa for a longer sleep... I begged him even. So, when he woke me up again, I had to check the time twice, as Koa had come through for me, and allowed me almost 5½ hours of snoozing in one go! I quickly got up, as I knew Koa was in need of food, and a pee and poop. So, I got up, and we started our "day".

Thanks to all for your kindness and support during my "journey through daily life" :bear_love: I really appreciate it :bear_hugs: as it helps me to keep going on bad/harder days! :bear_nuzzle:

:pixy_party: 💜 🍀 🐾

#PixysJourney
#WeirdFolks
#ActuallyAuDHD
#KoaKoolani