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1000 results for “microfiction”
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"Upgrade your life?" The man squinted at the poster. "Says I can improve my memory, make better decisions and gain confidence. All in one easy step. Oh." His face fell. "Some #trepanning needed."
"Only a small hole," argued his robot companion. "Sounds great to me."
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"Upgrade your life?" The man squinted at the poster. "Says I can improve my memory, make better decisions and gain confidence. All in one easy step. Oh." His face fell. "Some #trepanning needed."
"Only a small hole," argued his robot companion. "Sounds great to me."
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"Upgrade your life?" The man squinted at the poster. "Says I can improve my memory, make better decisions and gain confidence. All in one easy step. Oh." His face fell. "Some #trepanning needed."
"Only a small hole," argued his robot companion. "Sounds great to me."
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In my dream, a woman appeared, dressed in yellow with white petticoats. Bright red lines curved up her brown cheeks & down her nose. She had a basket of yellow fruit, one of which she cut open: white flesh, & at the center, a brown nut covered in a lacy wax of bright red. Nutmeg and #mace
"Precious spices," I murmured.
"In small doses," the woman said. "There are those who take too much, attempting visions. They #rue their choice.
Another natural lesson in restraint.
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The problem with most of the #MicroFiction I see #OnHere is that it relies very heavily on sentimentality. I don't dig it. It's corny, and you're not being as clever as you think.
I write my own short stories, autobiographical and elaborated from the daily experiences of my life. I enjoy how they are anti-sentimental, that they turn emotional expectations sideways and don't offer tidy resolutions or spoon-fed morals. Sure it has to be longer and most people will TLDR it, but I think I and others take much more away from it than trite little tales about a misunderstood dragon scoring a verbal comuppance against a coneited knight or whatever.
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I was sick of cheese sticking to the knife when I cut it, so I got a proper cutter.
I also stopped off at the fromagerie and picked up some quality cheeses to celebrate.
I got home, and with great ceremony opened a soft club cheddar. 36 months aged. I cut a slice - perfect, not a bit stuck to the cutter. Then I tasted it.
Bland. Blander than processed cheddar.
So I cut a piece of emmentaler. Nothing. The cracker had stronger flavour.
The same with the 5 year romano.
I broke a piece off the romano, and tasted it. Flavour exploded in my mouth, sharp and savoury. I cut a piece. Nothing. Broke a piece, heaven.
So I looked at the packaging of the cutter, and realised my mistake. I had purchased a Cheese Plain, not a Cheese Plane.
#microfiction #microfic #tootfic #IAmWriting #humour #dadjoke #shaggydog
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I was sick of cheese sticking to the knife when I cut it, so I got a proper cutter.
I also stopped off at the fromagerie and picked up some quality cheeses to celebrate.
I got home, and with great ceremony opened a soft club cheddar. 36 months aged. I cut a slice - perfect, not a bit stuck to the cutter. Then I tasted it.
Bland. Blander than processed cheddar.
So I cut a piece of emmentaler. Nothing. The cracker had stronger flavour.
The same with the 5 year romano.
I broke a piece off the romano, and tasted it. Flavour exploded in my mouth, sharp and savoury. I cut a piece. Nothing. Broke a piece, heaven.
So I looked at the packaging of the cutter, and realised my mistake. I had purchased a Cheese Plain, not a Cheese Plane.
#microfiction #microfic #tootfic #IAmWriting #humour #dadjoke #shaggydog
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I was sick of cheese sticking to the knife when I cut it, so I got a proper cutter.
I also stopped off at the fromagerie and picked up some quality cheeses to celebrate.
I got home, and with great ceremony opened a soft club cheddar. 36 months aged. I cut a slice - perfect, not a bit stuck to the cutter. Then I tasted it.
Bland. Blander than processed cheddar.
So I cut a piece of emmentaler. Nothing. The cracker had stronger flavour.
The same with the 5 year romano.
I broke a piece off the romano, and tasted it. Flavour exploded in my mouth, sharp and savoury. I cut a piece. Nothing. Broke a piece, heaven.
So I looked at the packaging of the cutter, and realised my mistake. I had purchased a Cheese Plain, not a Cheese Plane.
#microfiction #microfic #tootfic #IAmWriting #humour #dadjoke #shaggydog
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I was sick of cheese sticking to the knife when I cut it, so I got a proper cutter.
I also stopped off at the fromagerie and picked up some quality cheeses to celebrate.
I got home, and with great ceremony opened a soft club cheddar. 36 months aged. I cut a slice - perfect, not a bit stuck to the cutter. Then I tasted it.
Bland. Blander than processed cheddar.
So I cut a piece of emmentaler. Nothing. The cracker had stronger flavour.
The same with the 5 year romano.
I broke a piece off the romano, and tasted it. Flavour exploded in my mouth, sharp and savoury. I cut a piece. Nothing. Broke a piece, heaven.
So I looked at the packaging of the cutter, and realised my mistake. I had purchased a Cheese Plain, not a Cheese Plane.
#microfiction #microfic #tootfic #IAmWriting #humour #dadjoke #shaggydog
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The mage frowned. "But you don't know how to #joust."
"No need," said the rogue. "They provide me with horse, armour and lance, right?"
"Yes?"
"I mount up then make a break for it."
"And then?"
"Next town along, I sell everything and disappear."
"Won't you be recognised?"
"Course not. I'll keep the helmet on."
"So they'll behead you anonymously. Capital."
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The hooded customer slid a gold coin over. "Refill, please."
"My pleasure, sir." The bartender topped up his glass.
"That's a change. Nearly everywhere, I'm an unwanted #guest."
"Not here, not as long as you pay your tab." The bartender chuckled. "Though I hope you're not Death."
"Me? No. I'm... the other one."
"What? Get out!"
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She was strangely #articulate tho' her accent and -to a lesser degree- her face was much different to those who I had known.
Yet what was I to imagine? This planet I had crashed into wasn't alien it was human.
We were hundreds if not a thousand or two apart.
I looked into the fire which burned my astro-ship and laughed. "Wierd coincidence." I thought to myself.
I pushed passed the cave girl and stepped closer towards the edge of the land, toward the shore.
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She was strangely #articulate tho' her accent and -to a lesser degree- her face was much different to those who I had known.
Yet what was I to imagine? This planet I had crashed into wasn't alien it was human.
We were hundreds if not a thousand or two apart.
I looked into the fire which burned my astro-ship and laughed. "Wierd coincidence." I thought to myself.
I pushed passed the cave girl and stepped closer towards the edge of the land, toward the shore.
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She was strangely #articulate tho' her accent and -to a lesser degree- her face was much different to those who I had known.
Yet what was I to imagine? This planet I had crashed into wasn't alien it was human.
We were hundreds if not a thousand or two apart.
I looked into the fire which burned my astro-ship and laughed. "Wierd coincidence." I thought to myself.
I pushed passed the cave girl and stepped closer towards the edge of the land, toward the shore.
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The wizard sniffed. "I shall once again attempt to #articulate these esoteric concepts to you in such a manner as to—"
"Why don't you just say what you mean," grumbled the rogue.
The barbarian snickered. "Because he can't."
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The wizard sniffed. "I shall once again attempt to #articulate these esoteric concepts to you in such a manner as to—"
"Why don't you just say what you mean," grumbled the rogue.
The barbarian snickered. "Because he can't."
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The wizard sniffed. "I shall once again attempt to #articulate these esoteric concepts to you in such a manner as to—"
"Why don't you just say what you mean," grumbled the rogue.
The barbarian snickered. "Because he can't."
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The wizard sniffed. "I shall once again attempt to #articulate these esoteric concepts to you in such a manner as to—"
"Why don't you just say what you mean," grumbled the rogue.
The barbarian snickered. "Because he can't."
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People ask me why I'm always so relaxed. I have a deck of answers; I shuffle through them and try to make the one I choose match the person asking--not sure how good I am at that, though.
Here's the truth: it's because I have a microdimension tucked into my pocket, a pocket-sized pocket dimension. If I need a breather, I just pull myself into it. It's a lovely, lazy place, #redolent of indolence, you might say. I linger a bit listening to the four-dimensional birds.
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All the eligible bachelors were trying desperately to snag Vivian Marsh, rumored to be worth her weight in stocks, securities, & rare-earth metals.
Dirk Sharpley, who fancied himself a prime contender, rapped confidently at the door of her Belgravia apartment. Viv's publicist answered.
"Sorry, Dirk. You're not to call anymore. Henceforth Ms. Marsh will be spending her nights with Percival Doud." The door shut in his face.
"I-I've been made #redundant!" Dirk moaned.
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"I'm a dwelf: my father's a dwarf and my mother's an elf. Most people have never met one."
I nodded, looking up at his #dainty elven facial features and pointy ears, framed by a thick dwarven beard, complete with a narrow braid down the middle. Some people had done a double take when he entered the tavern, noticing his face and his unusual limb-to-torso ratio.
"I get that," I said, and took a long sip on my dark ale.
"And you?" he hesitated. "I can usually tell smaller folk apart, but I didn't want to presume…"
I smiled. "I'm a gnarf. Father — gnome, mother — dwarf."
We both laughed. I liked him.
"You reckon that's why the matching spell set us up on a date?"
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"What are you doing in here?" the night security guy asked.
Fianna spun round & braced herself against the desk.
"Me? Ah--" Her mouth felt like #flannel & her heart was hammering. One hand brushed the leaf of an African violet with a ribbon round its pot. "I was leaving a plant for the boss," she improvised. "A present."
The security guy looked over her shoulder & saw the violet. "Good idea! He loves those." He waved her--and the thumb drive in her pocket--on out.
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Svett looked in awe at the lush, mixed crop fields in front of him.
"You've worked wonders here! This land was #barren for as long as anyone can remember. What's your secret?"
Yarla smiled. "Unicorn poo. It's the best fertiliser there is. Not easy to get a hold of, though. Not cheap, either. I had to hire dozens of virgins to dance in the woods, hoping to attract a unicorn, then follow it until it pooed."
"You're joking!" Svett sounded unsure.
"Of course I am. Unicorns are mythical creatures."
Svett sighed with relief.
"It's actually dragon poo."
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As the rain fell in torrents, except at occasional intervals when it was checked by a violent gust of wind that swept up the streets, Stark checked his Thieves Guild tag (for it is in Ankh-Morkpork that our story lies) and glanced along the street where a magically illuminated sign flickered futilely against the darkness, causing him to comment to his companion, "You know, Dormy, I think this is going to be our night!"
#microfiction #tootfic #TerryPratchett #fanfic #pun #BulwerLytton
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As the rain fell in torrents, except at occasional intervals when it was checked by a violent gust of wind that swept up the streets, Stark checked his Thieves Guild tag (for it is in Ankh-Morkpork that our story lies) and glanced along the street where a magically illuminated sign flickered futilely against the darkness, causing him to comment to his companion, "You know, Dormy, I think this is going to be our night!"
#microfiction #tootfic #TerryPratchett #fanfic #pun #BulwerLytton
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As the rain fell in torrents, except at occasional intervals when it was checked by a violent gust of wind that swept up the streets, Stark checked his Thieves Guild tag (for it is in Ankh-Morkpork that our story lies) and glanced along the street where a magically illuminated sign flickered futilely against the darkness, causing him to comment to his companion, "You know, Dormy, I think this is going to be our night!"
#microfiction #tootfic #TerryPratchett #fanfic #pun #BulwerLytton
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As the rain fell in torrents, except at occasional intervals when it was checked by a violent gust of wind that swept up the streets, Stark checked his Thieves Guild tag (for it is in Ankh-Morkpork that our story lies) and glanced along the street where a magically illuminated sign flickered futilely against the darkness, causing him to comment to his companion, "You know, Dormy, I think this is going to be our night!"
#microfiction #tootfic #TerryPratchett #fanfic #pun #BulwerLytton