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#smartaleck — Public Fediverse posts

Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #smartaleck, aggregated by home.social.

  1. Jeremy Mallin @[email protected] ·

    My wife: "What was the name of this actress? Joanne something?"

    Was her last name Fabrics? 🤪

    #SmartAleck

    #smartaleck
  2. Jeremy Mallin @[email protected] ·

    "I'm going to call my mom real quick."

    I just call her Sandy.

    #SmartAleck

    #smartaleck
  3. Jeremy Mallin @[email protected] ·

    "It's a metaphor."

    Ok. But, what's a phor? 🤪

    #SmartAleck

    #smartaleck
  4. Jeremy Mallin @[email protected] ·

    #RandomThoughts
    Jockey: "I won by a nose."

    Me: "Was it yours?"

    #SmartAleck

    #randomthoughts #smartaleck
  5. Jeremy Mallin @[email protected] ·

    My wife earlier today: "You left your phone on the stove."

    Me: "I know. It's not done yet."
    🤪😆

    #SmartAleck
    #TrueStory

    #smartaleck #truestory
  6. Jeremy Mallin @[email protected] ·

    "Only a Sith deals in absolutes."

    But, isn't that an absolute too? OMG! Are you a Sith?

    #SmartAleck

    #smartaleck
  7. JBRoss @[email protected] ·

    "A know-it-all is a person who knows everything except for how annoying he is." — ​Demetri Martin — — — #DemetriMartin #quote #quotes #quip #knowitall #bore #annoy #bothersome #smartaleck #braggart #humor #humorous #funny #windbag

    #demetrimartin #quote #quotes #quip #knowitall #bore
  8. Jeremy Mallin @[email protected] ·

    When I asked my wife what she wanted for dinner, she said she's "having a chicken".

    I said "That's called laying an egg."

    #SmartAleck

    #smartaleck