#poweronstorytoot — Public Fediverse posts

“You sold. The ship. To scrappers. My ship. The ship you promised me.”

I left. Just barely before I hit anyone. I took a runabout and just flew. I dived into the rings, recklessly, hearing ice ping off the hull. I don’t think i wanted to die, I just wanted not to think. Another ring. *skrinklegling*. Where was I going, no idea. What did I want? A future.

D-ring. *skrinklegl-CLANK* fuck that one had rock in it. I cut the drive. Wait, reengage and program an orbit.

“Ship, search mineral claims on LV-729 D Ring”

«none found»

“Register a provisional claim, warm up the spectroscope, let’s see what we’ve got”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Blind_Flight

When the cyber planet returned it found a million asteroids parked in its orbit. The belters claimed squatters’ rights, and the ICJ on Phobos supported them, but as always a laser finger trumps a court order out in the expanse.

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Parking_Lot

The great dome of Angus McGyver Technomage Academy—named for an early technomage of the planet whose rubble supported the asteroid campus—thundered with applause. The graduating class stood on stage as the applause died down and the chancellor spoke.

“—am immensely proud, as would be my great grandfather I’m sure, of each and every one of you. In the spirit of our founder, we don’t do speeches here; we act. Get off my planetoid and go save the universe.”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Graduation

"Furries? Why are there furries *everywhere* today?"

"Big kerfuffle on the Internet. They're doing what they can."

"Which is?–"

"Here come a couple. Watch."

Furry 1: "Hi, we'd like to disclose that we're wired for simstim. We are soliciting HUGOPS for sysadmins."

Furry 2: "To be clear, if you hug either of us, the hug will be transmitted to an IT worker burning midnight oil at a keyboard to keep you safe from this latest...." *paws wiggled disgustedly* "ugh. Are you in?"

"We're in, brace yourselves!"

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Hug_Ops

On foggy mornings the walls between worlds are thinnest. A certain kind of clear evening is a good predictor of the right conditions. I rise early, bake muffins (chocolate with white-chocolate-shut-up-I-like-it-OK chunks, natch) and flip a coin. Heads, one universe to the left, tails one to the right. I head out into the fog, and walk until I feel the ambience change. If you don’t go too many universes your key should still work; I backtrack to alt-my house and leave the box of muffins on the kitchen bench. I know how much she needs a little kindness.

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Foggy_Mornings

“Excuse me. Have you seen the rolling pin?”

“Aye missus, it’s down the bottom right up the back. Right Lassies, lift on three, two, AYUP!”

Ikea would go bust if everyone knew that the best kitchen gadget of all is a nest of Pictsies.

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Kitchen_Aid

“OPEN YOUR BIBLE NOW”

“What?”

“Go to your bookshelf, get a bible”

“I’m not at home, I’m traveling for work, overnighting in an airport hotel at ORD”

“Even better, get the Gideons bible from the nightstand, open to the contents page. It’s an ESV. What’s the last book?”

“Duh, Revelation. Wait, Whiskey Tango—”

“Is there another book listed?”

“Yeah, contents says Apologia”

“Open to that page, read aloud, now”

“Yeah I’m doing it. ‘Hi, sorry for the silence, it’s been a while since I updated this blog, I’ve been busy with a new project’…”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Apologia

“Nope, can’t go to that one. No lift for my wheelchair at Sherwood station. We could go to Toowong instead, it’s only five more stops”

“Hang on, it’s Saturday, yeah?”

“Yes, darling. And this is Earth.”

“I know *that* Hun. Anyway the VWASPs woman Sherwood on Saturdays”

“The whatnow?”

“Volunteer Witch Accessibility for Station Platforms.”

“Oh, the Levitation Lesbians?”

“Well, they’re not /all/ lesbians.”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Need_A_Lift

The label said “Kodak Ectochrome 25 ASA”.

“Hahaha did you 3D print that for a halloween prop?”

“No this is the real deal”

“Bullshit, aura sensitive film is an urban myth”

“Nope, the CIA commissioned it as part of the PURE SPIRIT program to employ ghosts as espionage agents.”

“What, why? How does a ghost hold a camera?”

“Not by them, of them. The residual human resources department demanded that the ghosts be issued photo ID cards. The Three Letter Agencies might violate six international treaties before breakfast but HR cannot be disobeyed.”

“Where did you get it?”

“Stole it. Kodak museum, sealed wing. They only made 50 rolls. CIA canceled the order after they worked out it was cheaper to take normal ID photos then kill the agent.”

“Remind me to join the union”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Company_Spirit

As scheduled since Spacedate 42159.3 Spacefleet is today ending support for Personnel Transport Protocol. As you should be aware only Secure Serialised Humanoid protocol will be available for beaming to and from Spacefleet vessels from this date.

Yikes that snuck up on me. I mean I’m technically ready but I’ll miss the old way. Nicking pocket change from transporting spacefleet personnel was good while it lasted.

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Deprecation

When the great old ones returned they made just one demand. “W̵̤̺͋̏̍͒Ḣ̸̲̩̍Ǫ̷̱̗̻̀̎ ̶̜̜̩͉́̈́I̴̼̝͔͆̋̄̕Ş̴̨̮̠͝ ̴͓͖͚͌̔͝R̴̳̔̇͊Ȅ̸̗̜́͝ͅS̶̮͚͋͜͠P̸͍͈̒͋̋O̵̡̹͗͋̈́͠N̵̠̂̀̈́͒S̵̆̐̆͗͜Ĭ̷̧̜̦̊B̸̭̣̼̺̐̐̏L̶͚͚͖͕̎̇̋E̷̬̜̬̽̏̐ ̴̜͕̎͛̕F̸̬͙̞̫͛̾̓͘Ò̸̺͘͜Ŕ̵̗̜͌͊̈́͜ ̵̜̟̜̿̃ͅT̷̬̫̬̎̉͑̎H̵̛̹̝͕̍̚I̵̠̠̿̿̈́S̵̱̓̓̀ ̷̼̠́͆M̵̩̱͇̹͐̚Ë̶̯͈́͋S̸͎̮̘̈́̀͂̃͜S̶̢͔̥̿?̶̼̠̺͔͠”

After they ate those people, drank all the petroleum, and cleaned the atmosphere, things have been pretty fine, mostly. The GOOs sleep a lot. They approve of cats, so they let us stick around to look after them.

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Catsitters

“See you next year!”

“Oh, going somewhere?”

“I’ve signed in for a nine month tour on the traveling cat cuddle cafe. I’m taking a mail rocket to Ceres then joining for a loop of the inner belt”

“Dear Discordia, why?”

“The pay is—sorry—out of this world for a barista gig. Also, HELLO KITTIES”

“Asteroid miners must be nuts to buy an overpriced a coffee just to get cuddle time with a cat”

“You should do a tour, gurl, might help you get over being dead inside”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Remote_Work

@Unixbigot 🤣💯

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Friends #BonusEdition

“EUAHHHHHH Meteor storm! Get to the shelter!”

“Relaaax luv it’s just a little hail. Not even pea sized.”

“Whah-whua?”

“C’mere.” *hug* “Storm will pass soon, then we can sleep to the relaxing sound of rain”

“Not relaxing! That shielding is inadequate. Did you say it was tin? Should be titanium.”

“It’s corrugated steel sheet, actually; I dunno why we call it tin.”

“Planet words are bad enough, without them being lies too!”

“Shhhh, you’re safe here.”. Oooops, we’ll need to talk about more about storm season—but in daylight.

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Rainy_Night

“Uh, hi. I wonder is it possible to fix the luck button on my phone?”

“Wow you don’t see those any more, it’s in good nick otherwise?”

“Yeah, I’ve kept it because I like the physical luck button. I looked it up on ihexit.com but it said repair difficulty impossible. So I brought it to you.”

“Awww, you’re too kind”

“Do you think you can save it?”

“Chances are good. The impossible rating is because the case is a one piece casting and can’t be opened without spilling the magic. UNLESS you know the secret”

“Oh kay, so i should go away while you do the secret thing?”

“Oh no, all my tricks are Open Sorcery. You need a jumbo ziplock bag and an imp. Wake up Archie, we got a luck button on an InnerEye Phone Seven. Deep breath and i’m gonna seal you in.”

„roight yar mistress!„

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Luck_Button

A hood was removed. Strong light split the darkness. “Whuh, where am I?”

“You have no need to know. Do you deny that you are ShopperThey96?”

“Th—thats my BigRiver username, if that’s what you’re asking”

“Excellent. This will go better for you if you remain truthful”

“This is preposterous! Who are you people?”

“We are the Friends of Ea-Nasir. We—“

“Oh, no, please don’t kill me! I—“

“Despite the lies you may have seen on the tubes, we are not murderers.”

“What do you want with me?”

“You recently purchased a pair of Songheiner Earbuds, yes?”

“Y-yes.”

“And you left a one star review?”

“They died after a week!”

“You wore them in the shower?”

“I always do that”

“The manual warns against this”

“I didn’t know!”

“We know. Now you do. And now you have a choice!”

“Wh-what”

“You can spend the next month in the dark down here with the rats. or.”

“ooo-or?”

A phone was proferred. “Or you can correct your review”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Friends #BonusEdition

“Billionaires, “ the teacher said “were a cognitohazard of the late dirt ages. In that time it was normal to force humans to perform labour for four to five decades before being permitted a period of limited rest known as retirement. The billionaire class found ways to steal even the limited resources remaining to retired victims for themselves.”

A hand went up. “Miss, why did they do it?”

“You can ask; today we will meet one of these ancient monsters”

A nervous titter. “A simulation—right?”

“Oh no, a corpsicle. After the Reset they were frozen and periodically reanimated to remind us all never again. Everyone take a stick from the rack and make sure it is sharp.”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_History_Class

*knock *knock

“Enter!”

“Good morning miss van Helsing. I wonder if you have a moment for a consult?”

“Susan, please. We’ve been neigbours for a year now. What can a horrorologist do for a horologist?”

“It’s a new, uh patient. Perhaps it’s easier if I show you?”

“Of course, do you have it with you?”

“Ah, no, it’s much to delicate to carry about in its current state. It’s downstairs in a silver Faraday cage”

“This I must see. Lay on, do”

*later*

“A *vampire* Imp? I’ve never seen such a thing. Do you want to know how to kill it?”

“It’s Lame. Can you cure it?”

“Will it bite?”

“Oh their fangs are too short to break human skin. Careful, it’ll try though!”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Consult

“Ooooh a sausage sizzle, I’m getting one!”

“There’s no price list. How much?”

“Uh how much are your sausages?”

“Oh, they’re free. This stall is operated by the Free Sausage Foundation”

“Ooooh kay, but these stalls usually raise money for the school. Last election they got the netball court repaired!”

“The netball team bagged another billionaire, the bounty went to metro south, fifteen schools funded for a decade.”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Fundraiser

“BRIDGE CAPTAIN was that a TORPEDO launch?”

“CAPTAIN BRIDGE yes, sorry to disturb you ma’am just a training exercise”

“Whoops, we woke the old lady. Okay Alice, one big rock turned into little rocks, ready on meteor defence?”

〰︎Assigning fire control to trainee. Let ‘em have it Fluffy〰︎

“Join the merchant marine, they said, see the stars, make a difference. Teach the ship’s kitten to fire lasers wasn’t in the brochure. Shoulda bin.”

〰︎Good shot little floof!〰︎

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Training_Day

“Hah, the Anthropic principle is my bae!”

“What?”

“Well you know how some say that, because this universe appears fine-tuned for life, it therefore must be designed? And how others say LOL no gurl we just exist in one of the randomly parameterised universes that lets us exist, because if you don’t exist then you can’t get published in _Nature_?”

“Yes, I was beside you in cosmoengineering 101, remember?”

“Asleep, if i recall. Anyway….”

“Uncalled for. And you haven’t been published in Nature either. But pray, continue, oh great cosmo-insomniac”

“My breakthrough—I’m calling this the causanthropic principle—“

“—I’ll be sure to tell the Nobel Committee next time we do brunch”

“Shush, the causanthropic principle, which states that causality-threatening faster than light travel cannot exist in populated universes, because you went extinct in those where it did. But I found a loophole”

“Yes?”

“I locate the nearest neighbour universe with the physics that I want, then I overflow the segment register projecting my desired phenomenon into this universe. FTL, transuranics, antigravity, butter-side-up toast, it’s all possible!”

“Congratulations, you’ve invented the apocalypse.”

“Uh….damn!”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Overflow

“Cass love, do you want to go out for lunch?”

“You promised me Barcelona”

“That was a figure of speech, but uh, OK, let me check the suborbital schedules”

“Kidding, but not. My old buddy RMS Barcelona is in port, can’t wait to show her this new fit”

“Is that why you spent so long in the bathroom?”

“Nah, it’s just hot showers are even better than getting your corridors steam cleaned. Hashtag not-a-euphemism”

*ksneglrk* Argh, who’s going to clean up this tea?

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Squeaky_Clean

ABOUT THE ROLE: The Forward-Deployed Quality Engineer acts to ensure complete test coverage of the application by eliminating database entries that fall outside test coverage.

ABOUT YOU: You are comfortable working within our ISO9001c quality process, and have at least five years experience with precision telescopic-sighted long arms and a documented kill-rate exceeding 95%. In addition you have at least ten deletions with knife or garrote.

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Position_Description #BonusEdition

The imperial commission into the Sirius Sector hyperspace bypass tunnel collapse during construction determined that designers Flarx Fn’urglz and Partners of Procyon specified that temporary struts be used to support the tunnel prior to connection to the endpoint gate, however the constructors elected to vary the instructions by instead demolishing one of the bypassed systems to reduce spacetime-torsional load on the partially erected tunnel. However the gravity waves from the demolition temporarily exceeded the holding tension of the intra-tunnel pocket universe, resulting in a subspace rupture that destroyed or damaged a further five systems. Alas the planet vogsphere being located in one of the destroyed systems meant that damages against the construction firm could not be collected. Those constructor fleets surviving the demise of their homeworld fled the sector; this instrument has determined that they have since been responsible for further construction incidents in the pisces sector. We can now reveal that

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Commission

In precision machining it’s known that the standard twist drill makes holes that are never perfectly round nor perfectly sized. When exactness is required you drill slightly undersized then follow up with a reamer. Needing 10.000mm I drilled 9.9 and chucked a 10mm reamer. Instead of taking tiny shavings and leaving a perfect finish, the reamer did nothing; it fit loose in the hole. Heckin fuck, the drill was bent and drilled oversize. Now i’m screwed. Options: weld it up, move the hole, change the size, press in a sleeve. All bad. Or. I glance at the freezer. This could be the perfect save—i’ve been saving this for such an emergency. In the freezer was a dewar. In the dewar was liquid nitrogen. In the nitrogen was a tube. The printing on the tube: “ACME 10.000mm negative reamer. SINGLE USE. ☢︎”. Wish me luck.

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Last_Resort

“Have you got the shopping list Alibraxus?”

“YES MISTRESS SARAH; I REGRET THAT MY BINDING PROHIBITS ME FROM ACCOMPANYING YOU TO THE MALL. I SHALL UNLOAD AND STOW, OF COURSE”

“It’s probably for the best. hmmmn—A lot of cat food for one cat, Al?”

“I HAVE BECOME QUITE POPULAR WITH THE NEIGHBOURHOOD STRAYS, MISTRESS. THE LITTLE BLIGHTERS CAN SPOT A SUCKER.”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Strays

@Unixbigot I genuinely thought this was a #poweronstorytoot until near the end.

“How about that one?”

“Ugh, no, too new!”

“What, worried engineering won’t be called on to save the day any more?”

“Reliable is fine, but those 601s have fully sealed plasma conduits”

“Which means?”

“No more making s’mores at the inspection ports”

“Yeah, not that one, then”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Too_New

“This is bullshit, those people are dying; this plague it’s—ugh!

“The prime directive says…”

“Fuck the prime directive with gagh sauce!”

“Reminds me of the mutara nebula”

“What?.”

“Just checking. The resistance countersign is ‘ah I can almost smell the ammonia’. Welcome aboard”

“There’s a *resistance* to the prime directive? Coooool”

“Yes, we aim to interfere! I’m going to accidentally leave this tricorder with the code for the antivirus behind when I beam back up. I want *you* to drop this medical hyposprayer before you beam back.”

“Ah, I can almost smell the ammonia”

“Now you’re getting it!”

#Tootfic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_The_Smell_Of_Ammonia

Move fast and break things they said. Well, Sol was permabanned from the galactic wormhole network thanks to littering the lanes with failed test ships. We have to make it to another system via N-space and reapply. I'm so over this trip, still two centuries to go.

#TootFic #MicroFiction #PowerOnStoryToot #Title_Slow_Boat