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#notmyfault — Public Fediverse posts

Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #notmyfault, aggregated by home.social.

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  1. Why is Peter Pan always flying?

    He neverlands.

    I like this joke because it never grows old.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  2. Why is Peter Pan always flying?

    He neverlands.

    I like this joke because it never grows old.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  3. Why is Peter Pan always flying?

    He neverlands.

    I like this joke because it never grows old.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  4. Why is Peter Pan always flying?

    He neverlands.

    I like this joke because it never grows old.

  5. Why is Peter Pan always flying?

    He neverlands.

    I like this joke because it never grows old.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  6. Dude 1: hey, bro.

    Dude 2: yeah, bro?

    Dude 1: can you hand me that pamphlet?

    Dude 2: brochure.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault #Bro

  7. Dude 1: hey, bro.

    Dude 2: yeah, bro?

    Dude 1: can you hand me that pamphlet?

    Dude 2: brochure.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault #Bro

  8. Dude 1: hey, bro.

    Dude 2: yeah, bro?

    Dude 1: can you hand me that pamphlet?

    Dude 2: brochure.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault #Bro

  9. Dude 1: hey, bro.

    Dude 2: yeah, bro?

    Dude 1: can you hand me that pamphlet?

    Dude 2: brochure.

  10. Dude 1: hey, bro.

    Dude 2: yeah, bro?

    Dude 1: can you hand me that pamphlet?

    Dude 2: brochure.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault #Bro

  11. Doctor: your body has run out of magnesium.

    Me: 0Mg

  12. The CEO of IKEA has just been appointed as the Prime Minister of Sweden.

    He’s currently assembling his cabinet.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  13. The CEO of IKEA has just been appointed as the Prime Minister of Sweden.

    He’s currently assembling his cabinet.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  14. The CEO of IKEA has just been appointed as the Prime Minister of Sweden.

    He’s currently assembling his cabinet.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  15. The CEO of IKEA has just been appointed as the Prime Minister of Sweden.

    He’s currently assembling his cabinet.

  16. The CEO of IKEA has just been appointed as the Prime Minister of Sweden.

    He’s currently assembling his cabinet.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  17. How do you console an English teacher?

    There, their, they’re.

  18. How much to hire a church singing group?

    You mean a choir?

    Fine, how much to acquire a church singing group?

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  19. How much to hire a church singing group?

    You mean a choir?

    Fine, how much to acquire a church singing group?

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  20. How much to hire a church singing group?

    You mean a choir?

    Fine, how much to acquire a church singing group?

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  21. How much to hire a church singing group?

    You mean a choir?

    Fine, how much to acquire a church singing group?

  22. How much to hire a church singing group?

    You mean a choir?

    Fine, how much to acquire a church singing group?

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  23. Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?

    No sun.

  24. To everyone who says telepathy is an invasion of privacy: your thoughts are simply very enthusiastic about making themselves known. I can't help what broadcasts itself. #LwaxanaTroi #NotMyFault #AllStarTrek #StarTrek #StarTrekTNG #TNG #StarTrekDS9 #DS9 #Mastodon

  25. To everyone who says telepathy is an invasion of privacy: your thoughts are simply very enthusiastic about making themselves known. I can't help what broadcasts itself. #LwaxanaTroi #NotMyFault #AllStarTrek #StarTrek #StarTrekTNG #TNG #StarTrekDS9 #DS9 #Mastodon

  26. To everyone who says telepathy is an invasion of privacy: your thoughts are simply very enthusiastic about making themselves known. I can't help what broadcasts itself. #LwaxanaTroi #NotMyFault #AllStarTrek #StarTrek #StarTrekTNG #TNG #StarTrekDS9 #DS9 #Mastodon

  27. To everyone who says telepathy is an invasion of privacy: your thoughts are simply very enthusiastic about making themselves known. I can't help what broadcasts itself. #LwaxanaTroi #NotMyFault #AllStarTrek #StarTrek #StarTrekTNG #TNG #StarTrekDS9 #DS9 #Mastodon

  28. To everyone who says telepathy is an invasion of privacy: your thoughts are simply very enthusiastic about making themselves known. I can't help what broadcasts itself. #LwaxanaTroi #NotMyFault #AllStarTrek #StarTrek #StarTrekTNG #TNG #StarTrekDS9 #DS9 #Mastodon

  29. Did you hear about the guy who collapsed trying to climb Mount Everest?

    Authorities just found Himalayan there.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  30. Did you hear about the guy who collapsed trying to climb Mount Everest?

    Authorities just found Himalayan there.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  31. Did you hear about the guy who collapsed trying to climb Mount Everest?

    Authorities just found Himalayan there.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  32. Did you hear about the guy who collapsed trying to climb Mount Everest?

    Authorities just found Himalayan there.

  33. Did you hear about the guy who collapsed trying to climb Mount Everest?

    Authorities just found Himalayan there.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  34. Buddha: one sandwich, please.
    Vendor: what do you want on it?
    Buddha: make me one with everything. 🧘🏻

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  35. Buddha: one sandwich, please.
    Vendor: what do you want on it?
    Buddha: make me one with everything. 🧘🏻

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  36. Buddha: one sandwich, please.
    Vendor: what do you want on it?
    Buddha: make me one with everything. 🧘🏻

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  37. Buddha: one sandwich, please.
    Vendor: what do you want on it?
    Buddha: make me one with everything. 🧘🏻

  38. Buddha: one sandwich, please.
    Vendor: what do you want on it?
    Buddha: make me one with everything. 🧘🏻

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  39. (Psst…hey, kids. This is from the Oregon Trail game that originated in the 80s. Look it up!)

  40. There only two white actors in the movie “Black Panther.” Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins in “Lord of the Rings,” and Andy Serkis, who played Gollum.

    They are the Tolkien white guys.

    (Paraphrased from NerdsWithVaginas.)

    #DadJokes #MomJokes #Puns #NotMyFault #NoReallyThisTimeNerdsWithVaginasIsAtFault

  41. There only two white actors in the movie “Black Panther.” Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins in “Lord of the Rings,” and Andy Serkis, who played Gollum.

    They are the Tolkien white guys.

    (Paraphrased from NerdsWithVaginas.)

    #DadJokes #MomJokes #Puns #NotMyFault #NoReallyThisTimeNerdsWithVaginasIsAtFault

  42. There only two white actors in the movie “Black Panther.” Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins in “Lord of the Rings,” and Andy Serkis, who played Gollum.

    They are the Tolkien white guys.

    (Paraphrased from NerdsWithVaginas.)

    #DadJokes #MomJokes #Puns #NotMyFault #NoReallyThisTimeNerdsWithVaginasIsAtFault

  43. There only two white actors in the movie “Black Panther.” Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins in “Lord of the Rings,” and Andy Serkis, who played Gollum.

    They are the Tolkien white guys.

    (Paraphrased from NerdsWithVaginas.)

  44. There only two white actors in the movie “Black Panther.” Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins in “Lord of the Rings,” and Andy Serkis, who played Gollum.

    They are the Tolkien white guys.

    (Paraphrased from NerdsWithVaginas.)

    #DadJokes #MomJokes #Puns #NotMyFault #NoReallyThisTimeNerdsWithVaginasIsAtFault