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#notmyfault — Public Fediverse posts

Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #notmyfault, aggregated by home.social.

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  1. The CEO of IKEA has just been appointed as the Prime Minister of Sweden.

    He’s currently assembling his cabinet.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  2. The CEO of IKEA has just been appointed as the Prime Minister of Sweden.

    He’s currently assembling his cabinet.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  3. The CEO of IKEA has just been appointed as the Prime Minister of Sweden.

    He’s currently assembling his cabinet.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  4. The CEO of IKEA has just been appointed as the Prime Minister of Sweden.

    He’s currently assembling his cabinet.

  5. The CEO of IKEA has just been appointed as the Prime Minister of Sweden.

    He’s currently assembling his cabinet.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  6. How do you console an English teacher?

    There, their, they’re.

  7. How much to hire a church singing group?

    You mean a choir?

    Fine, how much to acquire a church singing group?

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  8. How much to hire a church singing group?

    You mean a choir?

    Fine, how much to acquire a church singing group?

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  9. How much to hire a church singing group?

    You mean a choir?

    Fine, how much to acquire a church singing group?

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  10. How much to hire a church singing group?

    You mean a choir?

    Fine, how much to acquire a church singing group?

  11. How much to hire a church singing group?

    You mean a choir?

    Fine, how much to acquire a church singing group?

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  12. Dad, can you tell me what a solar eclipse is?

    No sun.

  13. To everyone who says telepathy is an invasion of privacy: your thoughts are simply very enthusiastic about making themselves known. I can't help what broadcasts itself. #LwaxanaTroi #NotMyFault #AllStarTrek #StarTrek #StarTrekTNG #TNG #StarTrekDS9 #DS9 #Mastodon

  14. To everyone who says telepathy is an invasion of privacy: your thoughts are simply very enthusiastic about making themselves known. I can't help what broadcasts itself. #LwaxanaTroi #NotMyFault #AllStarTrek #StarTrek #StarTrekTNG #TNG #StarTrekDS9 #DS9 #Mastodon

  15. To everyone who says telepathy is an invasion of privacy: your thoughts are simply very enthusiastic about making themselves known. I can't help what broadcasts itself. #LwaxanaTroi #NotMyFault #AllStarTrek #StarTrek #StarTrekTNG #TNG #StarTrekDS9 #DS9 #Mastodon

  16. To everyone who says telepathy is an invasion of privacy: your thoughts are simply very enthusiastic about making themselves known. I can't help what broadcasts itself. #LwaxanaTroi #NotMyFault #AllStarTrek #StarTrek #StarTrekTNG #TNG #StarTrekDS9 #DS9 #Mastodon

  17. To everyone who says telepathy is an invasion of privacy: your thoughts are simply very enthusiastic about making themselves known. I can't help what broadcasts itself. #LwaxanaTroi #NotMyFault #AllStarTrek #StarTrek #StarTrekTNG #TNG #StarTrekDS9 #DS9 #Mastodon

  18. Did you hear about the guy who collapsed trying to climb Mount Everest?

    Authorities just found Himalayan there.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  19. Did you hear about the guy who collapsed trying to climb Mount Everest?

    Authorities just found Himalayan there.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  20. Did you hear about the guy who collapsed trying to climb Mount Everest?

    Authorities just found Himalayan there.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  21. Did you hear about the guy who collapsed trying to climb Mount Everest?

    Authorities just found Himalayan there.

  22. Did you hear about the guy who collapsed trying to climb Mount Everest?

    Authorities just found Himalayan there.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  23. Buddha: one sandwich, please.
    Vendor: what do you want on it?
    Buddha: make me one with everything. 🧘🏻

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  24. Buddha: one sandwich, please.
    Vendor: what do you want on it?
    Buddha: make me one with everything. 🧘🏻

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  25. Buddha: one sandwich, please.
    Vendor: what do you want on it?
    Buddha: make me one with everything. 🧘🏻

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  26. Buddha: one sandwich, please.
    Vendor: what do you want on it?
    Buddha: make me one with everything. 🧘🏻

  27. Buddha: one sandwich, please.
    Vendor: what do you want on it?
    Buddha: make me one with everything. 🧘🏻

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault

  28. (Psst…hey, kids. This is from the Oregon Trail game that originated in the 80s. Look it up!)

  29. There only two white actors in the movie “Black Panther.” Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins in “Lord of the Rings,” and Andy Serkis, who played Gollum.

    They are the Tolkien white guys.

    (Paraphrased from NerdsWithVaginas.)

    #DadJokes #MomJokes #Puns #NotMyFault #NoReallyThisTimeNerdsWithVaginasIsAtFault

  30. There only two white actors in the movie “Black Panther.” Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins in “Lord of the Rings,” and Andy Serkis, who played Gollum.

    They are the Tolkien white guys.

    (Paraphrased from NerdsWithVaginas.)

    #DadJokes #MomJokes #Puns #NotMyFault #NoReallyThisTimeNerdsWithVaginasIsAtFault

  31. There only two white actors in the movie “Black Panther.” Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins in “Lord of the Rings,” and Andy Serkis, who played Gollum.

    They are the Tolkien white guys.

    (Paraphrased from NerdsWithVaginas.)

    #DadJokes #MomJokes #Puns #NotMyFault #NoReallyThisTimeNerdsWithVaginasIsAtFault

  32. There only two white actors in the movie “Black Panther.” Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins in “Lord of the Rings,” and Andy Serkis, who played Gollum.

    They are the Tolkien white guys.

    (Paraphrased from NerdsWithVaginas.)

  33. There only two white actors in the movie “Black Panther.” Martin Freeman, who played Bilbo Baggins in “Lord of the Rings,” and Andy Serkis, who played Gollum.

    They are the Tolkien white guys.

    (Paraphrased from NerdsWithVaginas.)

    #DadJokes #MomJokes #Puns #NotMyFault #NoReallyThisTimeNerdsWithVaginasIsAtFault

  34. @mmiasma Oh, in certain situations I have zero problem telling people I'm Canadian. It is the orange clown and his enablers who are dishonoring the memory of the remarkable people in our history. The thing that's important to me when I travel is to stay safe. And I also really don't want to hear people complaining to me about how fucked up my country is since every vote I've cast would have prevented this, had the person I voted for won. #NotMyFault

  35. @mmiasma Oh, in certain situations I have zero problem telling people I'm Canadian. It is the orange clown and his enablers who are dishonoring the memory of the remarkable people in our history. The thing that's important to me when I travel is to stay safe. And I also really don't want to hear people complaining to me about how fucked up my country is since every vote I've cast would have prevented this, had the person I voted for won. #NotMyFault

  36. @mmiasma Oh, in certain situations I have zero problem telling people I'm Canadian. It is the orange clown and his enablers who are dishonoring the memory of the remarkable people in our history. The thing that's important to me when I travel is to stay safe. And I also really don't want to hear people complaining to me about how fucked up my country is since every vote I've cast would have prevented this, had the person I voted for won. #NotMyFault

  37. @mmiasma Oh, in certain situations I have zero problem telling people I'm Canadian. It is the orange clown and his enablers who are dishonoring the memory of the remarkable people in our history. The thing that's important to me when I travel is to stay safe. And I also really don't want to hear people complaining to me about how fucked up my country is since every vote I've cast would have prevented this, had the person I voted for won. #NotMyFault

  38. @mmiasma Oh, in certain situations I have zero problem telling people I'm Canadian. It is the orange clown and his enablers who are dishonoring the memory of the remarkable people in our history. The thing that's important to me when I travel is to stay safe. And I also really don't want to hear people complaining to me about how fucked up my country is since every vote I've cast would have prevented this, had the person I voted for won. #NotMyFault

  39. En daar gáát mijn goede voornemen om me minder op te winden over politiek… 😡
    #notmyfault

  40. En daar gáát mijn goede voornemen om me minder op te winden over politiek… 😡
    #notmyfault

  41. En daar gáát mijn goede voornemen om me minder op te winden over politiek… 😡
    #notmyfault

  42. En daar gáát mijn goede voornemen om me minder op te winden over politiek… 😡
    #notmyfault

  43. En daar gáát mijn goede voornemen om me minder op te winden over politiek… 😡
    #notmyfault

  44. How many therapists does it take to change a light bulb?

    One. But the bulb has to want to change.

    #DadJokes #Puns #NotMyFault #Therapy #MentalHealth