Sometimes I get this eerie feeling that the long forgotten versions of me that were only ever a question of what it could be like, are coming into my life.
One new friend is an amazing artist, and she creates so much art with items she finds in the world around her. Feathers dropped from birds, sticks, crystals, a plastic dinosaur. She picks up items she feels compelled to create with, and it's wonderful!
I remember many times, imagining what I could create with found items, if I had the inner artistic calling. I always thought I could be good at it if I tried, but I hadn't felt that moment of freedom where my inner artistic feelings bubbled up so that I was aware the feelings and drive were there.
Now I feel my pull. I have so many objects that I will be using soon, to express ideas inside of me. I've gathered them for years. Dolores the headless mannequin has been hauled to Chicago and back, and I feel the inner call to create with her. I will know when it is time, for now I feel the feelings, but have no visual knowledge of how this will manifest - because aphantasia, no visual imagery in my mind.
I have come to view this lack of visual imagery as a blessing. That would be more words than I want to use now, to tell. Let's just say, I really love surprises!
And I have had a handful of visuals in recent months. Some in days after psychedelic use, even microdose levels. At least one having no apparent psychedelic connection. Some when awake with my eyes close, some during sleep. And now, both static and moving images.
All of this is a new experience. I possibly had visuals when I was a toddler/young kid, but nothing I've ever remembered. I am certain I've had none since I was 8-10, at least. And this year, as I allow myself the certainty that I can reconnect with this piece of my imagination, despite having zero evidence it was possible when I started, I have begun to Understand the magic in the world around me, even when I cannot directly see it.
My inner ability to reconnect to my mind's eye - despite 40 years of dormancy and a cyst on my pineal glad - supports my Knowledge and Understanding that all I have to do is become Aligned with myself, and I can accomplish anything I want to.
Imagine how powerful we could all be if those of us who are Aligned with Love and who desire Peace were to join together on just this as our guiding beach - allowing a massive Alignment of Love to propel us onward.
I have observed on myself a recent inner call to write raw words again. Unfiltered, exploratory and yet grounded words, like I write to myself. Only I feel the pull to write here. These flows always seem to last weeks, months, years before fading.
So here I am, Allowing the flow, looking for how to open the tap inside of myself even wider. My world feels so aligned, and I am so happy to be in this moment, Now, aware of what's coming, with no details of how it will manifest. Just a Knowing that it will be as divine as I allow it to be.
And remembering that when I write in flow, I do not need to always add clarity after, unless the reason to do so is apparent. Most of this is just allowing me to see something about myself.
🦄🪞🪄
*it used to interrupt my energy flow, before awakening, I'm unsure how much more healing I get to do there or if it's already complete, but I feel my mind's eye opening even more than I see it opening
#UnicornMirrorMagic
#UnicornJournaling
#Aphantasia
