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#preacherssecrethabit — Public Fediverse posts

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  1. reading passages of the Old Testament in their best Samuel L. Jackson voice

    #PreachersSecretHabit
    #HashTagGames

  2. #HashtagGames
    #PreachersSecretHabit

    ..isn't really so secret on a hot August night.
    He goes around to pack up the babies and grab the old ladies so that everyone goes.
    Everyone knows it's Brother Love's Travelin' Salvation Show.

    youtu.be/K398Q4DYCW8?si=WCmH-U…

  3. The substack he's writing under a pseudonym that reveals how it's all a scam and no one is listening on the ground or in the sky.

    #PreachersSecretHabit
    #HashTagGames

  4. Chugging the wine behind the pulpit and switching it for grape juice in the chalice.

    #PreachersSecretHabit
    #HashtagGames

  5. sinking donations into NFTs
    .. for jesus* or whatever

    * jesus is a pixelated ape smoking a tiny cigarette

    #PreachersSecretHabit
    #HashTagGames

  6. rides the tiger
    he sees the stripes
    but he knows he's clean

    gotta get away, yeah

    #PreachersSecretHabit
    #HashTagGames

  7. #PreachersSecretHabit #HashtagGames

    Lays on the floor of the Sunday school after everyone has left and makes the Fisher Price school bus pick up the plastic dinosaur figures to take them to the Barbie Dream House where they have a discussion with the other toys about how they were only put on earth to fool the atheists.

  8. #PreachersSecretHabit #HashtagGames

    When putting on her vestments she pretends to be the Snow Queen in THE WITCH, THE LION AND THE WARDROBE.

  9. #PreachersSecretHabit #HashtagGames

    Presents his receipts for spending the weekend at the local Best Western to binge watch Studio Ghibli Films and eat Chinese take out as a religious retreat.

  10. #PreachersSecretHabit #HashtagGames

    Throwing away any corduroy pants donated to the clothing charity, because no one should be loud when simply walking down a quiet hall.

  11. #PreachersSecretHabit #HashtagGames

    Wears two inch lifts in his shoes for the extra height needed at the pulpit to better see the female parishioners cleavage. Oh, and Tony Linzos chest peeking out of his satin shirt, because the Preacher swings both ways.