#woeisme — Public Fediverse posts

I was looking for a Shakespeare quote and I was sure it was in Hamlet but I couldn't find it no matter how much I looked. Turns out it was from the Swedish translation... 🤦‍♀️

#WoeIsMe #BilingualShenanigans

I was looking for a Shakespeare quote and I was sure it was in Hamlet but I couldn't find it no matter how much I looked. Turns out it was from the Swedish translation... 🤦‍♀️

#WoeIsMe #BilingualShenanigans

This morning's ruck was just... ugh. Running with a backpack full of boxing gear and water takes a full 30-60 seconds off my lap time; then when it's off I'm overstriding like a sodding horse let loose in a paddock.

#Running #RunningBadly #WoeIsMe

This morning's ruck was just... ugh. Running with a backpack full of boxing gear and water takes a full 30-60 seconds off my lap time; then when it's off I'm overstriding like a sodding horse let loose in a paddock.

#Running #RunningBadly #WoeIsMe

This morning's ruck was just... ugh. Running with a backpack full of boxing gear and water takes a full 30-60 seconds off my lap time; then when it's off I'm overstriding like a sodding horse let loose in a paddock.

#Running #RunningBadly #WoeIsMe

This morning's ruck was just... ugh. Running with a backpack full of boxing gear and water takes a full 30-60 seconds off my lap time; then when it's off I'm overstriding like a sodding horse let loose in a paddock.

#Running #RunningBadly #WoeIsMe

This morning's ruck was just... ugh. Running with a backpack full of boxing gear and water takes a full 30-60 seconds off my lap time; then when it's off I'm overstriding like a sodding horse let loose in a paddock.

#Running #RunningBadly #WoeIsMe

I knew that if I bought the snacks I would eat the snacks

So I didn’t buy the snacks
So that I wouldn’t eat the snacks

But now I want snacks
And I don’t have any snacks

#woeIsMe

I knew that if I bought the snacks I would eat the snacks

So I didn’t buy the snacks
So that I wouldn’t eat the snacks

But now I want snacks
And I don’t have any snacks

#woeIsMe

I knew that if I bought the snacks I would eat the snacks

So I didn’t buy the snacks
So that I wouldn’t eat the snacks

But now I want snacks
And I don’t have any snacks

#woeIsMe

I knew that if I bought the snacks I would eat the snacks

So I didn’t buy the snacks
So that I wouldn’t eat the snacks

But now I want snacks
And I don’t have any snacks

#woeIsMe

I knew that if I bought the snacks I would eat the snacks

So I didn’t buy the snacks
So that I wouldn’t eat the snacks

But now I want snacks
And I don’t have any snacks

#woeIsMe

where my head’s at right now heading into spin #54

So recently i’ve been feeling really self-critical and extremely anti-me. About a week ago i realized a local bar was having their monthly goth night and i got a little pep out of the idea. On a local Discord server, this really cool chick said she was gonna go, and my wife and i were also planning on going (until she felt under the weather and stayed home), and all of us were broke, so i figured i’ll get a few big beers at the supermarket, and we’ll meet up in the parking lot and just pregame before going in.

It ended up being a whole lot of fun (for me, anyway). She brought (IIRC, the night is a bit fuzzier now) her roommate and her (roommate’s) partner, and they were hella cool and nice and fun, and i even danced while terrifically drunk without falling over, despite wearing heeled platform boots. Great, right?!

But the next day happened.

Here’s how bipolar works: some days are dreary, and then at some point you realize that you’re fun to be around, you’re pretty smart and funny, and you’re still fairly attractive despite your advanced age (that huge beer gut really isn’t that noticeable if you wear the right top), and you’re a fairly likeable person, so you treat yourself to some fun, and — after many years of avoiding people (oh i also have Avoidant Personality Disorder) — you might even awkwardly try to make some new friends in the process of being pretty fun to be around. And then the mania ends, and you realize that no, actually, you’re not at all fun or smart or attractive or witty, you’re actually fairly well the opposite of those things. That really nice self-perception gives way to the terrible reality that you’re actually just a fake-ass try-hard poseur dipshit loser. Toss in some alcohol, and you might not even remember what you probably did, but you’re sure as hell that you’d be absolutely mortified if you could.

So i thought i’d try to be friendly and make friends — oh geez you just have no idea how unbelievably cool this gal is, she’s just the bee’s leg joints, i ain’t kidding, i’d die to actually be IRL friends with her, she’s so sweet and funny and cute and smart and brave, and so helpful; she’s just a lovely human being — and then you spend way too much money and things kinda crash, and now you’re so broke you’re not sure how you’re going to eat or get around for the next couple of weeks (work’s been drying up as well), and the next day you strongly suspect your imagined “charm” was all a bipolar mirage, and really you were just a twitchy, insufferable dork, and… you get The Message. The Universe says, “oh hahaha no no no no no. No. You can’t do that. What a stupid idea; don’t you ever think you could do that again, you stupid twerp. You deserve no such happiness.”

I’ve quit the local Discord servers. This seems to be a thing i keep doing. I’m embarrassed to show up anywhere people might associate my handle with atrocious behavior or excessive stupidity. Also i’m deleting messages i posted, even DMs. I’ve said goodbye to Instagram, which i really only wanted to keep a presence on for promoting my awful music anyway. Shaving, grooming, and makeup have become quaint things of the past. Already my old beard is filling in. It’s so easy to give up. I’ve tried so hard for so long. It’s almost as exhausting to be me, always losing, as it must be to witness me being me. I feel so awful for other people.

some random notes as i narcissistically learn more about myself:

• i’m bi – so i’m not queer enough to be LGBTQIA+ (other bi people are, though)
• i’m non-binary – so i’m not trans enough to be transgender (other enbies are, though)
• i’m too old now to ever be able to be beautiful (other people my age — like my wife! — are actually genuinely gorgeous, though)
• i’ve never been as smart as some people seemed to think
• i’m not very funny except on very rare occasions
• every good or cool thing i’ve ever done? it was just the mania, it wasn’t even me at all

So anyway, i’d already been thinking of ending it on or right before my birthday next week. And then something made me think of the days… see, one of my other friends measures her time in thousands of days, so i looked it up on my phone, where i have a widget counting the days since that awful first one… and 20 thousand days alive are coming up in about nine and a half months. Now i’m thinking (since i’m a fucking pussy coward anyway) i should just wait for that. Maybe that’ll give me time to get my name change in order, too. It’d be nice if nobody ever found out what happened to that old guy (as if anyone would ever care). At any rate, maybe something will happen to shake me out of the complete and absolute certitude of my feelings about my own awfulness and worthlessness. Who knows.

Oh hey i just realized this is a great place to plug my new song, which is incidentally about all of this:

I just started therapy today too, so i got into the weeds a bit about how my parents abandoned me, and boo hoo this and that, and about biker dudes killing my favorite kitten, and how i wrecked my grandparents’ marriage, and the whole horror of early childhood thing. So we’ll see how it goes.

But i guess if something different happens, maybe someday someone can stumble on this post and realize that it was gonna happen, and maybe understand a little bit more about why it happened.

#avoidantPersonalityDisorder #bipolar #depression #socialAnxiety #suicide #woeIsMe

So I was enjoying a nice Bundy rum & coke in front of the fire so I decided to have another. I poured out the last of the Bundy before I realized that I was out of Coke. Bugger! I did have a few cans of tonic so I decided to use that instead.
It is fucking awful. I'll be glad when I am finished.
#WoeIsMe #FML #catastrophe

So I was enjoying a nice Bundy rum & coke in front of the fire so I decided to have another. I poured out the last of the Bundy before I realized that I was out of Coke. Bugger! I did have a few cans of tonic so I decided to use that instead.
It is fucking awful. I'll be glad when I am finished.
#WoeIsMe #FML #catastrophe

So I was enjoying a nice Bundy rum & coke in front of the fire so I decided to have another. I poured out the last of the Bundy before I realized that I was out of Coke. Bugger! I did have a few cans of tonic so I decided to use that instead.
It is fucking awful. I'll be glad when I am finished.
#WoeIsMe #FML #catastrophe

So I was enjoying a nice Bundy rum & coke in front of the fire so I decided to have another. I poured out the last of the Bundy before I realized that I was out of Coke. Bugger! I did have a few cans of tonic so I decided to use that instead.
It is fucking awful. I'll be glad when I am finished.
#WoeIsMe #FML #catastrophe

So I was enjoying a nice Bundy rum & coke in front of the fire so I decided to have another. I poured out the last of the Bundy before I realized that I was out of Coke. Bugger! I did have a few cans of tonic so I decided to use that instead.
It is fucking awful. I'll be glad when I am finished.
#WoeIsMe #FML #catastrophe

The j-tube is clogged again, and the coke isn’t helping much. I do not want to go back to the ER. But I’m not sure if I can avoid it. It hasn’t been this clogged before. The coke isn’t getting far enough down the tube to have a hope of unclogging. And the tube has come off the adapter twice now, which is not a good thing. #caregiving #WoeIsMe

The j-tube is clogged again, and the coke isn’t helping much. I do not want to go back to the ER. But I’m not sure if I can avoid it. It hasn’t been this clogged before. The coke isn’t getting far enough down the tube to have a hope of unclogging. And the tube has come off the adapter twice now, which is not a good thing. #caregiving #WoeIsMe

The j-tube is clogged again, and the coke isn’t helping much. I do not want to go back to the ER. But I’m not sure if I can avoid it. It hasn’t been this clogged before. The coke isn’t getting far enough down the tube to have a hope of unclogging. And the tube has come off the adapter twice now, which is not a good thing. #caregiving #WoeIsMe

The j-tube is clogged again, and the coke isn’t helping much. I do not want to go back to the ER. But I’m not sure if I can avoid it. It hasn’t been this clogged before. The coke isn’t getting far enough down the tube to have a hope of unclogging. And the tube has come off the adapter twice now, which is not a good thing. #caregiving #WoeIsMe

The j-tube is clogged again, and the coke isn’t helping much. I do not want to go back to the ER. But I’m not sure if I can avoid it. It hasn’t been this clogged before. The coke isn’t getting far enough down the tube to have a hope of unclogging. And the tube has come off the adapter twice now, which is not a good thing. #caregiving #WoeIsMe

Apparently Facebook doesn't know what to do when you upload a GIF that is not animated -- just a single image.

Animation wasn't even added until GIF89a! The main Discord channel I haunt also disallows GIFs wholesale -- to avoid animated GIFs any *.GIF file is trashed.

Is this what the human race has come to?

#ITSNOTAVIDEO #GIF #animGIF #images #imageformats #woeisme #ilament #Facebook #society #sadness #regret #tech #Fb

Apparently Facebook doesn't know what to do when you upload a GIF that is not animated -- just a single image.

Animation wasn't even added until GIF89a! The main Discord channel I haunt also disallows GIFs wholesale -- to avoid animated GIFs any *.GIF file is trashed.

Is this what the human race has come to?

#ITSNOTAVIDEO #GIF #animGIF #images #imageformats #woeisme #ilament #Facebook #society #sadness #regret #tech #Fb

Apparently Facebook doesn't know what to do when you upload a GIF that is not animated -- just a single image.

Animation wasn't even added until GIF89a! The main Discord channel I haunt also disallows GIFs wholesale -- to avoid animated GIFs any *.GIF file is trashed.

Is this what the human race has come to?

#ITSNOTAVIDEO #GIF #animGIF #images #imageformats #woeisme #ilament #Facebook #society #sadness #regret #tech #Fb

Apparently Facebook doesn't know what to do when you upload a GIF that is not animated -- just a single image.

Animation wasn't even added until GIF89a! The main Discord channel I haunt also disallows GIFs wholesale -- to avoid animated GIFs any *.GIF file is trashed.

Is this what the human race has come to?

#ITSNOTAVIDEO #GIF #animGIF #images #imageformats #woeisme #ilament #Facebook #society #sadness #regret #tech #Fb

Apparently Facebook doesn't know what to do when you upload a GIF that is not animated -- just a single image.

Animation wasn't even added until GIF89a! The main Discord channel I haunt also disallows GIFs wholesale -- to avoid animated GIFs any *.GIF file is trashed.

Is this what the human race has come to?

#ITSNOTAVIDEO #GIF #animGIF #images #imageformats #woeisme #ilament #Facebook #society #sadness #regret #tech #Fb

Years ago, I stopped eating wheat & yeast in an attempt to curb my allergies & chronic sinusitis. For 10 glorious years, I was well, but slowly reintroduced wheat/yeast. I thought I was fine but after 2 years of battling again, I think it's time to go wheat/yeast-free again 😭😭

#WoeIsMe

Years ago, I stopped eating wheat & yeast in an attempt to curb my allergies & chronic sinusitis. For 10 glorious years, I was well, but slowly reintroduced wheat/yeast. I thought I was fine but after 2 years of battling again, I think it's time to go wheat/yeast-free again 😭😭

#WoeIsMe

Years ago, I stopped eating wheat & yeast in an attempt to curb my allergies & chronic sinusitis. For 10 glorious years, I was well, but slowly reintroduced wheat/yeast. I thought I was fine but after 2 years of battling again, I think it's time to go wheat/yeast-free again 😭😭

#WoeIsMe

And here I am, finally deciding to give #Bookwyrm another try and importing a bunch of books from #TheStoryGraph only to find out that #OpenLibrary.org is down, so lots of failed imports.
Guess, I'll have to take care of the dishes or something.

@bookstodon #Books #WoeIsMe

And here I am, finally deciding to give #Bookwyrm another try and importing a bunch of books from #TheStoryGraph only to find out that #OpenLibrary.org is down, so lots of failed imports.
Guess, I'll have to take care of the dishes or something.

@bookstodon #Books #WoeIsMe

And here I am, finally deciding to give #Bookwyrm another try and importing a bunch of books from #TheStoryGraph only to find out that #OpenLibrary.org is down, so lots of failed imports.
Guess, I'll have to take care of the dishes or something.

@bookstodon #Books #WoeIsMe

And here I am, finally deciding to give #Bookwyrm another try and importing a bunch of books from #TheStoryGraph only to find out that #OpenLibrary.org is down, so lots of failed imports.
Guess, I'll have to take care of the dishes or something.

@bookstodon #Books #WoeIsMe

Sympathize with me, internet friends. I discovered toward the end of a long car trip that I’d left my purse in the place we stopped to have lunch. We finished the drive to get the kids home, and now I get to spend the next 4 hours driving through the middle of nowhere to retrieve my stuff. #today #woeIsMe

Sympathize with me, internet friends. I discovered toward the end of a long car trip that I’d left my purse in the place we stopped to have lunch. We finished the drive to get the kids home, and now I get to spend the next 4 hours driving through the middle of nowhere to retrieve my stuff. #today #woeIsMe

Sympathize with me, internet friends. I discovered toward the end of a long car trip that I’d left my purse in the place we stopped to have lunch. We finished the drive to get the kids home, and now I get to spend the next 4 hours driving through the middle of nowhere to retrieve my stuff. #today #woeIsMe

Sympathize with me, internet friends. I discovered toward the end of a long car trip that I’d left my purse in the place we stopped to have lunch. We finished the drive to get the kids home, and now I get to spend the next 4 hours driving through the middle of nowhere to retrieve my stuff. #today #woeIsMe

Sympathize with me, internet friends. I discovered toward the end of a long car trip that I’d left my purse in the place we stopped to have lunch. We finished the drive to get the kids home, and now I get to spend the next 4 hours driving through the middle of nowhere to retrieve my stuff. #today #woeIsMe

@DemocracyMattersALot #WoeIsMe I’m pretty happy about his predicament.

@DemocracyMattersALot #WoeIsMe I’m pretty happy about his predicament.

@DemocracyMattersALot #WoeIsMe I’m pretty happy about his predicament.

@DemocracyMattersALot #WoeIsMe I’m pretty happy about his predicament.

@DemocracyMattersALot #WoeIsMe I’m pretty happy about his predicament.

Maybe it’s the flu, maybe it’s the COVID. Either way my considerable ass is getting thoroughly kicked today. Looking forward to another restless, achy, sneezy, shivery night. #WoeIsMe

Maybe it’s the flu, maybe it’s the COVID. Either way my considerable ass is getting thoroughly kicked today. Looking forward to another restless, achy, sneezy, shivery night. #WoeIsMe

Maybe it’s the flu, maybe it’s the COVID. Either way my considerable ass is getting thoroughly kicked today. Looking forward to another restless, achy, sneezy, shivery night. #WoeIsMe

Maybe it’s the flu, maybe it’s the COVID. Either way my considerable ass is getting thoroughly kicked today. Looking forward to another restless, achy, sneezy, shivery night. #WoeIsMe

Flu + concussion is like the worst almost-NYE combo ever.

#woeIsMe

Flu + concussion is like the worst almost-NYE combo ever.

#woeIsMe

Flu + concussion is like the worst almost-NYE combo ever.

#woeIsMe

Flu + concussion is like the worst almost-NYE combo ever.

#woeIsMe

Flu + concussion is like the worst almost-NYE combo ever.

#woeIsMe

Doom Patrol all but finished. Billions heading for the exit door. #WoeIsMe

W also stands for: What in the World happened to my Wonderful Dordle statistics on Wednesday?!?

Oh, woe is me...

#W #whatintheworld #wonderful #Wednesday #Dordle #Dordle617 #Dordle618 #WTH #woeisme

W also stands for: What in the World happened to my Wonderful Dordle statistics on Wednesday?!?

Oh, woe is me...

#W #whatintheworld #wonderful #Wednesday #Dordle #Dordle617 #Dordle618 #WTH #woeisme

W also stands for: What in the World happened to my Wonderful Dordle statistics on Wednesday?!?

Oh, woe is me...

#W #whatintheworld #wonderful #Wednesday #Dordle #Dordle617 #Dordle618 #WTH #woeisme

W also stands for: What in the World happened to my Wonderful Dordle statistics on Wednesday?!?

Oh, woe is me...

#W #whatintheworld #wonderful #Wednesday #Dordle #Dordle617 #Dordle618 #WTH #woeisme

W also stands for: What in the World happened to my Wonderful Dordle statistics on Wednesday?!?

Oh, woe is me...

#W #whatintheworld #wonderful #Wednesday #Dordle #Dordle617 #Dordle618 #WTH #woeisme