#scotthumor — Public Fediverse posts
Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #scotthumor, aggregated by home.social.
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I've been taking the next round of mandatory annual training at work and... good news, I'm only a few years away from qualifying for elder abuse. So, I've got that to look forward to. Hopefully it will keep me warm when Skynet cuts off my paycheck.
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Yayyy, my employer celebrated my 15-year anniversary with a line in the team PowerPoint. I will be sharing this award with my family tonight.
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Yo momma’s ass is so fat, it collapsed into a neutron star.
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My random thought of the day: do folks who do #perineum #sunning have a plan for getting those hard-to-see areas checked for suspicious moles?
On a related note, are there any #SitcomWriters on Fediverse? I’ve got a great idea for you.
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My random thought of the day: do folks who do #perineum #sunning have a plan for getting those hard-to-see areas checked for suspicious moles?
On a related note, are there any #SitcomWriters on Fediverse? I’ve got a great idea for you.
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My random thought of the day: do folks who do #perineum #sunning have a plan for getting those hard-to-see areas checked for suspicious moles?
On a related note, are there any #SitcomWriters on Fediverse? I’ve got a great idea for you.
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My random thought of the day: do folks who do #perineum #sunning have a plan for getting those hard-to-see areas checked for suspicious moles?
On a related note, are there any #SitcomWriters on Fediverse? I’ve got a great idea for you.
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My random thought of the day: do folks who do #perineum #sunning have a plan for getting those hard-to-see areas checked for suspicious moles?
On a related note, are there any #SitcomWriters on Fediverse? I’ve got a great idea for you.
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RE: https://mstdn.ca/@paulisci/115769727442381232
Thieves have taken flight with 100,000 eggs. Police are hoping someone with information will sing. Information leading to an arrest and conversion to jailbird status will be rewarded with a lot of scratch.
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RE: https://mstdn.ca/@paulisci/115769727442381232
Thieves have taken flight with 100,000 eggs. Police are hoping someone with information will sing. Information leading to an arrest and conversion to jailbird status will be rewarded with a lot of scratch.
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RE: https://mstdn.ca/@paulisci/115769727442381232
Thieves have taken flight with 100,000 eggs. Police are hoping someone with information will sing. Information leading to an arrest and conversion to jailbird status will be rewarded with a lot of scratch.
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RE: https://mstdn.ca/@paulisci/115769727442381232
Thieves have taken flight with 100,000 eggs. Police are hoping someone with information will sing. Information leading to an arrest and conversion to jailbird status will be rewarded with a lot of scratch.
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RE: https://mstdn.ca/@paulisci/115769727442381232
Thieves have taken flight with 100,000 eggs. Police are hoping someone with information will sing. Information leading to an arrest and conversion to jailbird status will be rewarded with a lot of scratch.
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Given the record-setting layoff pace of 2025, the pressing etiquette question of this time:
What is the respectful waiting period after a highly valued colleague is fired before you can delete your recurring 1:1 meeting from your calendar?
Joking, not joking.
#OfficeWorkerGripes #ScottHumor #JokingNotJoking #OfficeHumor
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Given the record-setting layoff pace of 2025, the pressing etiquette question of this time:
What is the respectful waiting period after a highly valued colleague is fired before you can delete your recurring 1:1 meeting from your calendar?
Joking, not joking.
#OfficeWorkerGripes #ScottHumor #JokingNotJoking #OfficeHumor
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Given the record-setting layoff pace of 2025, the pressing etiquette question of this time:
What is the respectful waiting period after a highly valued colleague is fired before you can delete your recurring 1:1 meeting from your calendar?
Joking, not joking.
#OfficeWorkerGripes #ScottHumor #JokingNotJoking #OfficeHumor
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Given the record-setting layoff pace of 2025, the pressing etiquette question of this time:
What is the respectful waiting period after a highly valued colleague is fired before you can delete your recurring 1:1 meeting from your calendar?
Joking, not joking.
#OfficeWorkerGripes #ScottHumor #JokingNotJoking #OfficeHumor
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Given the record-setting layoff pace of 2025, the pressing etiquette question of this time:
What is the respectful waiting period after a highly valued colleague is fired before you can delete your recurring 1:1 meeting from your calendar?
Joking, not joking.
#OfficeWorkerGripes #ScottHumor #JokingNotJoking #OfficeHumor
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I discovered Reviewbrah on YouTube a month ago. Not sure why it took the algorithm so long to connect us given that I love non sequitur / absurdist humor.
“My disappointment is immeasurable, and my day is ruined.”
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Employer again in 2024: please take the annual employee survey. It will only take you 10 minutes.
Survey provider: before you can take the survey, you must review and accept the 2,300 word (12,000 character) Terms of Use and the 5,800 word (33,000 character) Privacy Notice.
#OfficeWorkerGripes #TermsOfAbuse #ScottHumor #EmployeeSurvey
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Microsoft in 1995: we’ve added support for spaces in file and directory names.
Me in 2024: I’d better use underscores instead of spaces just in case some application doesn’t handle spaces in file paths correctly.
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Microsoft in 1995: we’ve added support for spaces in file and directory names.
Me in 2024: I’d better use underscores instead of spaces just in case some application doesn’t handle spaces in file paths correctly.
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Microsoft in 1995: we’ve added support for spaces in file and directory names.
Me in 2024: I’d better use underscores instead of spaces just in case some application doesn’t handle spaces in file paths correctly.
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Microsoft in 1995: we’ve added support for spaces in file and directory names.
Me in 2024: I’d better use underscores instead of spaces just in case some application doesn’t handle spaces in file paths correctly.
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Microsoft in 1995: we’ve added support for spaces in file and directory names.
Me in 2024: I’d better use underscores instead of spaces just in case some application doesn’t handle spaces in file paths correctly.
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I can’t wait until my neighbor with the perfect lawn who mows at least 50% more often than I do finds out that the person who spends more time doing enjoyable activities wins the game of life.
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Lead rhymes with read, but lead rhymes with read.
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"Show me on the Ken doll where the Barbie movie hurt you."
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Today, I got a flu shot in one arm and a bivalent Covid19 vaccine in the other arm. I hear doing it that way is like having a phased array antenna, so I’m hoping I finally get the 5G upgrade they keep promising. I’m going to hold my arms up and spin in circles until it works.
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To date, all humans who first took a breath of air more than 123 years ago have since died.
Applying the principle of post hoc, ergo propter hoc, we conclude that...