#sciencejokes — Public Fediverse posts

🌊🤔 Earth made its own oceans? Sure, because that's just what planets do on weekends—whip up a few trillion gallons of water for giggles. Next, we'll hear that mountains are Earth's acne and the Grand Canyon is just a bad shaving mishap. Keep 'em coming, Quanta! 😂🌎
https://www.quantamagazine.org/where-did-earth-get-its-oceans-maybe-it-made-them-itself-20260612/ #EarthOceans #PlanetaryScience #QuantaHumor #GeologicalWonders #ScienceJokes #HackerNews #ngated

I know why all #aliens are bald (hairless). To fly faster than the speed of light takes an enormous amount of energy (it's impossible). But at least I know how they stop — they use their moustaches! 😄

#sciencejokes
#Aliens

An #OldTweet by @paulcoxon from 9 years ago.
#SciComm #ScienceJokes #NatureJournal

Sure, Newton might be right about gravity, but Fermat has a point.

#ScienceJokes

I’m devastated (hyperbole) —not a single one of my Earth Science students commented on my “Flat Pluto Society” shirt today. We learned about the Solar System!

#scienceJokes #astronomyJokes #earthScience #astronomy

Mars with what?

So, a scientist has proposed we send semi-aquatic mammals as the first wave of colonising and terraforming Mars.

That’s otterly ridiculous.

#Mars #scienceJokes #space #terraforming

🚀🔬 Who knew CERN's world-class #particle #accelerators were actually just wool-spinning workshops? 🐑🔗 Next up: Higgs Boson discovered in a knitting circle. 🤣
https://home.cern/news/news/physics/cern-scientists-find-evidence-quantum-entanglement-sheep #CERN #Wool #Spinning #HiggsBoson #KnittingHumor #ScienceJokes #HackerNews #ngated

Ah yes, because nothing says cutting-edge scientific research like a website that can't even load without the magical duo of JavaScript and cookies. 🍪🔮 Clearly, the true regulators of gene expression are the elusive "Enable" and "Continue" buttons. 😂🔬
https://www.cell.com/molecular-cell/fulltext/S1097-2765(25)00053-X #cuttingedgeresearch #webdevelopment #geneexpression #technologyhumor #sciencejokes #HackerNews #ngated

You know what really sucks? …and blows?

HVAC! 🤪😆🥁

#PunsAreGreat #ScienceJokes

OH: Ein Pastor, ein Physiker und ein Mathematiker stehen an einer Bushaltestelle. Der Bus kommt, innen hell beleuchtet und man sieht, dass zwei Fahrgäste drin sitzen.

Der Bus hält an, und es steigen drei Fahrgäste aus.

Pfarrer: "Ein Wunder!"
Physiker: "Oh, haben wir einen Messfehler?"
Mathematiker: "Wenn jetzt einer von uns einsteigt, dann ist der Bus leer."

😂

#Science #ScienceJokes

Sixteen sodium atoms walk into a bar followed by Batman

I'll leave you with that.
#badjokes #sciencejokes

#sciencememes #science #chemistrymemes #chemistry #chememes #meme #memes #biology #biologymemes #physics #physicsmemes #biochemistry #organics #analytics #scientific #sciencejokes #funny #lab #sciencememe #chemistrymeme

The "periodic table"? Isn't it always a table? 🤪
#PunsAreGreat #ScienceJokes

https://punnyfunny.com/chemistry-jokes-and-puns

Why did the chemist stop making bad jokes? 👨‍🔬 Because all the good ones argon! 😂

#ChemistryHumor #PunIntended #ScienceJokes #LabLife #NerdyHumor #ChemistryPuns #LOLChemistry #JokesterScientist #LabCoatsAndLaughter"

Counting birds, Vultures, a plea for more green spaces where people live and a pretty good scientific joke.

#Gardens #Brds #Birding #Montreal #ScienceJokes #Parks #GreenSpace

https://1001species.substack.com/p/world-migratory-bird-day

Scientists have discovered a chemical that turns litmus paper red, but only on Tuesdays.

Apparently it's weekly acidic

#ScienceJokes

@Natasha_Jay

@ChrisWere
0mg Mg

#ScienceJokes

#ScienceJokes

How dense do you have to be to overlook the gravity of the matter

#gravityJokes #scienceJokes

🤒 It’s important to schedule any serious illness you have so that they don’t coincide with research funding deadlines 😷⁠
⁠
#scicommgroup #laboratorywork #laboratorymedicine #ScienceJokes #research

#ifyouknowyouknow #iykyk #astronomy #astrophysics #Science #sciencejokes

#Introduction time!

I am an #Oklahoma girl that now lives in #DC. I’m a scientist at the #NIH who is a proud dog momma 🐶.

I enjoy playing #videogames, watching #films and #tvshows, and doing #nailart. I have a side business making press on nails (Teacup Nails). I am a huge #foodie, either eating it or cooking it 🥗🍆🥙🍗🍱🥘

I enjoy #sciencejokes, #music, and #learning new things. I hope to meet new #friends and share #ideas

OH: "I think the plates here are larger than last time."
"Yes, the universe is expanding, that increases the space, and therefore the size of the plates."

#ScienceJokes

Two chemists walk into a bar:

The first one asks for H2O,
The second one asks for H2O too.

The second one had to go to the hospital! :GeordieOops: #Chemistry #ChemistryJokes #ScienceJokes

Sound waves are slow
Sound waves are fast
Wee ooh wee ooh
The Doppler Effect describes changes in frequency of any kind of sound or light wave produced by a moving source with respect to an observer, uh... going past

#sciencejokes
#audioengineering
#science
#audio
#mustodon

8 Simple Rules for Dating My Stone-age Carbon

1. Radioactive isotopes are unstable but not unloveable. Handle with care and especially with gloves
2.

#carbondating #sciencejokes #jokes #radioactive

Marine science question:
Do lobsters get crabs?

#jokes #ScienceJokes #Paulsjokes #Puns #Wordplay