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#mankind — Public Fediverse posts

Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #mankind, aggregated by home.social.

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  1. Agony Aunt: “Husband says ‘mankind’ can I divorce him?” 🧔‍♂️

    Some human males are prone to dialectical and other speech-based errors in judgement. Others are just stupid. Others use “mankind” because they know Neil Armstrong landed on the Moon and said that, so it’s okay.

    However, some human females do not think it is “okay”. Indeed, some believe it to be a grave error in spoken incorrectness. And that is what we’re exploring today to clear up all this mess.

    When a Man Says “Mankind” and it’s a Problem

    Dear agony aunt,

    My DICKHEAD of a husband is going out of his way to wind me up. He keeps saying “mankind” all the time, and texting me and using that word a lot. It’ll be a message like: “Hi babe, we going to go to the restaurant tonight to eat with mankind?” or “hey babe are you going to do my washing for the good of mankind?” and “manking is the main breadwinner babe you need to earn less than me”.

    He keeps making typos, too, and uses “manking” and that’s somehow even worse and I’m not even sure why.

    I know why he’s doing it. It’s because I bought the Blu-ray special edition of Barbie and we watched it for movie night and now he’s angry because I made him watch a “chick flick” and forced “feminist propaganda” onto him. This man is 43 years old by the way.

    So, I came up with a bunch of strategies to screw him over. Figured that’s a healthy way to respond as a mature adult:

    • The Neil Armstrong Protocol: Whenever he uses “mankind” I pretend to be an astronaut and start pretend floating around the room, while responding with NASA-like space telemetry jargon. See the below example:
      • “Copy, Houston, the carrier lock and signal-to-noise ratio is OOL, the attitude determination and control system is downlinked, uplink it to reduce the bit error rate and upload the housekeeping data.”
    • Blocked on WhatsApp: I’ve blocked him on WhatsApp so I don’t get his “manking” messages. He’s asked me why I never respond to his messages and I tell him it must be because of a bad connection.
    • Overuse of Womankind: To wind him up, I’ve been using “womankind” constantly throughout our conversations and regularly remind him that he has a hairy back and only an average sized penis.
    • Drunkenness: I’ve also started getting very drunk at random times (for example, on Saturday morning) just to wind him up. This works and he says “Why are you drunk!? It’s Saturday morning!” and I burp loudly and tell him to get back to his kitchen.

    It’s fair to say all of this has led to a decline in our marriage situation. We’re not on speaking terms at the moment, which is about the 10th time this month. And you know what? I’m kind of enjoying the peace and quiet.

    Do I hear divorce bells?

    Hit me with your rhythm stick (i.e. please provide logical feedback).

    Yours,

    Poppy

    Hi there, Poopy! You’ve asked for “logical” feedback, but we’re not that type of agony aunt. We’re more on the illogical side of things. However, we do think you’ve brought your A game to this marital conflict. The fact you can hear divorce bells signals one of two things:

    1. You’re having a mental breakdown and need urgent psychiatric assistance
    2. The Divorce Gods are calling to you and it is time to dump that zero and find yourself a hero

    We’re on first name terms terms with an industry-leading Divorce God, so we’ll forward her number and you can have a lovely chinwag about clinical insanity, manking, humanking, and sandwiches.

    #AgonyAunt #dating #divorce #Humor #Lifestyle #Love #mankind #Marriage #relationshipAdvice #Satire #satirical #Silly #Speech
  2. Agony Aunt: “Husband says ‘mankind’ can I divorce him?” 🧔‍♂️

    Some human males are prone to dialectical and other speech-based errors in judgement. Others are just stupid. Others use “mankind” because they know Neil Armstrong landed on the Moon and said that, so it’s okay.

    However, some human females do not think it is “okay”. Indeed, some believe it to be a grave error in spoken incorrectness. And that is what we’re exploring today to clear up all this mess.

    When a Man Says “Mankind” and it’s a Problem

    Dear agony aunt,

    My DICKHEAD of a husband is going out of his way to wind me up. He keeps saying “mankind” all the time, and texting me and using that word a lot. It’ll be a message like: “Hi babe, we going to go to the restaurant tonight to eat with mankind?” or “hey babe are you going to do my washing for the good of mankind?” and “manking is the main breadwinner babe you need to earn less than me”.

    He keeps making typos, too, and uses “manking” and that’s somehow even worse and I’m not even sure why.

    I know why he’s doing it. It’s because I bought the Blu-ray special edition of Barbie and we watched it for movie night and now he’s angry because I made him watch a “chick flick” and forced “feminist propaganda” onto him. This man is 43 years old by the way.

    So, I came up with a bunch of strategies to screw him over. Figured that’s a healthy way to respond as a mature adult:

    • The Neil Armstrong Protocol: Whenever he uses “mankind” I pretend to be an astronaut and start pretend floating around the room, while responding with NASA-like space telemetry jargon. See the below example:
      • “Copy, Houston, the carrier lock and signal-to-noise ratio is OOL, the attitude determination and control system is downlinked, uplink it to reduce the bit error rate and upload the housekeeping data.”
    • Blocked on WhatsApp: I’ve blocked him on WhatsApp so I don’t get his “manking” messages. He’s asked me why I never respond to his messages and I tell him it must be because of a bad connection.
    • Overuse of Womankind: To wind him up, I’ve been using “womankind” constantly throughout our conversations and regularly remind him that he has a hairy back and only an average sized penis.
    • Drunkenness: I’ve also started getting very drunk at random times (for example, on Saturday morning) just to wind him up. This works and he says “Why are you drunk!? It’s Saturday morning!” and I burp loudly and tell him to get back to his kitchen.

    It’s fair to say all of this has led to a decline in our marriage situation. We’re not on speaking terms at the moment, which is about the 10th time this month. And you know what? I’m kind of enjoying the peace and quiet.

    Do I hear divorce bells?

    Hit me with your rhythm stick (i.e. please provide logical feedback).

    Yours,

    Poppy

    Hi there, Poopy! You’ve asked for “logical” feedback, but we’re not that type of agony aunt. We’re more on the illogical side of things. However, we do think you’ve brought your A game to this marital conflict. The fact you can hear divorce bells signals one of two things:

    1. You’re having a mental breakdown and need urgent psychiatric assistance
    2. The Divorce Gods are calling to you and it is time to dump that zero and find yourself a hero

    We’re on first name terms terms with an industry-leading Divorce God, so we’ll forward her number and you can have a lovely chinwag about clinical insanity, manking, humanking, and sandwiches.

    #AgonyAunt #dating #divorce #Humor #Lifestyle #Love #mankind #Marriage #relationshipAdvice #Satire #satirical #Silly #Speech
  3. “Evolved beings have noticed that if you hit someone else with a hammer, that person gets hurt. If you keep doing it, that person gets angry. If you keep getting him angry, he finds a hammer of his own and eventually hits you back. Evolved beings therefore know that if you hit someone else with a hammer, you are hitting yourself with a hammer.”

    —Neale Donald Walsch:

    meiert.com/blog/hammers-hurt/

    #hammers #usa #israel #mankind

  4. “Evolved beings have noticed that if you hit someone else with a hammer, that person gets hurt. If you keep doing it, that person gets angry. If you keep getting him angry, he finds a hammer of his own and eventually hits you back. Evolved beings therefore know that if you hit someone else with a hammer, you are hitting yourself with a hammer.”

    —Neale Donald Walsch:

    meiert.com/blog/hammers-hurt/

    #hammers #usa #israel #mankind

  5. “Evolved beings have noticed that if you hit someone else with a hammer, that person gets hurt. If you keep doing it, that person gets angry. If you keep getting him angry, he finds a hammer of his own and eventually hits you back. Evolved beings therefore know that if you hit someone else with a hammer, you are hitting yourself with a hammer.”

    —Neale Donald Walsch:

    meiert.com/blog/hammers-hurt/

    #hammers #usa #israel #mankind

  6. “Evolved beings have noticed that if you hit someone else with a hammer, that person gets hurt. If you keep doing it, that person gets angry. If you keep getting him angry, he finds a hammer of his own and eventually hits you back. Evolved beings therefore know that if you hit someone else with a hammer, you are hitting yourself with a hammer.”

    —Neale Donald Walsch:

    meiert.com/blog/hammers-hurt/

  7. “Evolved beings have noticed that if you hit someone else with a hammer, that person gets hurt. If you keep doing it, that person gets angry. If you keep getting him angry, he finds a hammer of his own and eventually hits you back. Evolved beings therefore know that if you hit someone else with a hammer, you are hitting yourself with a hammer.”

    —Neale Donald Walsch:

    meiert.com/blog/hammers-hurt/

    #hammers #usa #israel #mankind

  8. (2/2)
    It's what it means to be a human who's been cursed with the thing called "imagination" cuz we were not supposed to stay stagnant. The nature's reasons aren't always coincidence.

    Coincidence is that Everyone have this ability. Use them wisely.

  9. (2/2)
    It's what it means to be a human who's been cursed with the thing called "imagination" cuz we were not supposed to stay stagnant. The nature's reasons aren't always coincidence.

    Coincidence is that Everyone have this ability. Use them wisely.

    #life #human #philosophy #purpose #creativity #imagination #mind #humanity #progress #mankind

  10. (2/2)
    It's what it means to be a human who's been cursed with the thing called "imagination" cuz we were not supposed to stay stagnant. The nature's reasons aren't always coincidence.

    Coincidence is that Everyone have this ability. Use them wisely.

    #life #human #philosophy #purpose #creativity #imagination #mind #humanity #progress #mankind

  11. (2/2)
    It's what it means to be a human who's been cursed with the thing called "imagination" cuz we were not supposed to stay stagnant. The nature's reasons aren't always coincidence.

    Coincidence is that Everyone have this ability. Use them wisely.

    #life #human #philosophy #purpose #creativity #imagination #mind #humanity #progress #mankind

  12. (1/2)
    Every element has a value in this world. And it's all seen as just rocks 100000s of years ago. Until we all start looking things in a different way than to accept what's in front on us, progress won't happen. Nothing in this world is useless from humans to other species to any tiny sand. It's all in how we perceive those.
    Raise ur perception by being more open minded then u could ever imagine.

  13. (1/2)
    Every element has a value in this world. And it's all seen as just rocks 100000s of years ago. Until we all start looking things in a different way than to accept what's in front on us, progress won't happen. Nothing in this world is useless from humans to other species to any tiny sand. It's all in how we perceive those.
    Raise ur perception by being more open minded then u could ever imagine.

    #life #human #philosophy #purpose #creativity #imagination #mind #humanity #progress #mankind

  14. (1/2)
    Every element has a value in this world. And it's all seen as just rocks 100000s of years ago. Until we all start looking things in a different way than to accept what's in front on us, progress won't happen. Nothing in this world is useless from humans to other species to any tiny sand. It's all in how we perceive those.
    Raise ur perception by being more open minded then u could ever imagine.

    #life #human #philosophy #purpose #creativity #imagination #mind #humanity #progress #mankind

  15. (1/2)
    Every element has a value in this world. And it's all seen as just rocks 100000s of years ago. Until we all start looking things in a different way than to accept what's in front on us, progress won't happen. Nothing in this world is useless from humans to other species to any tiny sand. It's all in how we perceive those.
    Raise ur perception by being more open minded then u could ever imagine.

    #life #human #philosophy #purpose #creativity #imagination #mind #humanity #progress #mankind

  16. (1/2)
    Every element has a value in this world. And it's all seen as just rocks 100000s of years ago. Until we all start looking things in a different way than to accept what's in front on us, progress won't happen. Nothing in this world is useless from humans to other species to any tiny sand. It's all in how we perceive those.
    Raise ur perception by being more open minded then u could ever imagine.

    #life #human #philosophy #purpose #creativity #imagination #mind #humanity #progress #mankind

  17. #UK #pilot #trainer of 20 years: some people really have no problems at all, could those help the others that are OVERWHELMED with #problems? #mankind ? no ? #tooboring ?

  18. of 20 years: some people really have no problems at all, could those help the others that are OVERWHELMED with ? ? no ? ?

  19. #UK #pilot #trainer of 20 years: some people really have no problems at all, could those help the others that are OVERWHELMED with #problems? #mankind ? no ? #tooboring ?

  20. #banks produce nothing #own everything? #unsustainable
    systemic + fatal flaw of modern day #fiat #monopoly #capitalism = modern day #feudalism: not #education or #intelligence earns most #money, no whoever owns #assets everyone else is dependant on = #exploitation = will ultimately lead to less #innovation + destruction of #mankind, #rich vs #poor + #inequality growing = #collapse of #society "thank you"

    = no matter how #smart #people or #government are or act: will lose game to whoever prints #money + buys = owns #assets = #bank #centralbank
    why? because new #fiat #money created of air whenever someone get's #loan approved (#governments usually get approved) problem: #interest on this #loan is NEVER created

    to pay #interest on #loan #government needs to take something away from someone (no matter domestic or foreign)

    #solution: invest every USD + EUR + Peso in your own #INDEPENDENCE from #financesystem #water, #food, #energy, DO IT NOW!

    #bernardlietaer youtube.com/watch?v=T9EI2PrDpmw

  21. #banks produce nothing #own everything? #unsustainable
    systemic + fatal flaw of modern day #fiat #monopoly #capitalism = modern day #feudalism: not #education or #intelligence earns most #money, no whoever owns #assets everyone else is dependant on = #exploitation = will ultimately lead to less #innovation + destruction of #mankind, #rich vs #poor + #inequality growing = #collapse of #society "thank you"

    = no matter how #smart #people or #government are or act: will lose game to whoever prints #money + buys = owns #assets = #bank #centralbank
    why? because new #fiat #money created of air whenever someone get's #loan approved (#governments usually get approved) problem: #interest on this #loan is NEVER created

    to pay #interest on #loan #government needs to take something away from someone (no matter domestic or foreign)

    #solution: invest every USD + EUR + Peso in your own #INDEPENDENCE from #financesystem #water, #food, #energy, DO IT NOW!

    #bernardlietaer youtube.com/watch?v=T9EI2PrDpmw

  22. #banks produce nothing #own everything? #unsustainable
    systemic + fatal flaw of modern day #fiat #monopoly #capitalism = modern day #feudalism: not #education or #intelligence earns most #money, no whoever owns #assets everyone else is dependant on = #exploitation = will ultimately lead to less #innovation + destruction of #mankind, #rich vs #poor + #inequality growing = #collapse of #society "thank you"

    = no matter how #smart #people or #government are or act: will lose game to whoever prints #money + buys = owns #assets = #bank #centralbank
    why? because new #fiat #money created of air whenever someone get's #loan approved (#governments usually get approved) problem: #interest on this #loan is NEVER created

    to pay #interest on #loan #government needs to take something away from someone (no matter domestic or foreign)

    #solution: invest every USD + EUR + Peso in your own #INDEPENDENCE from #financesystem #water, #food, #energy, DO IT NOW!

    #bernardlietaer youtube.com/watch?v=T9EI2PrDpmw

  23. produce nothing everything?
    systemic + fatal flaw of modern day = modern day : not or earns most , no whoever owns everyone else is dependant on = = will ultimately lead to less + destruction of , vs + growing = of "thank you"

    = no matter how or are or act: will lose game to whoever prints + buys = owns =
    why? because new created of air whenever someone get's approved (#governments usually get approved) problem: on this is NEVER created

    to pay on needs to take something away from someone (no matter domestic or foreign)

    : invest every USD + EUR + Peso in your own from , , , DO IT NOW!

    youtube.com/watch?v=T9EI2PrDpmw

  24. #banks produce nothing #own everything? #unsustainable
    systemic + fatal flaw of modern day #fiat #monopoly #capitalism = modern day #feudalism: not #education or #intelligence earns most #money, no whoever owns #assets everyone else is dependant on = #exploitation = will ultimately lead to less #innovation + destruction of #mankind, #rich vs #poor + #inequality growing = #collapse of #society "thank you"

    = no matter how #smart #people or #government are or act: will lose game to whoever prints #money + buys = owns #assets = #bank #centralbank
    why? because new #fiat #money created of air whenever someone get's #loan approved (#governments usually get approved) problem: #interest on this #loan is NEVER created

    to pay #interest on #loan #government needs to take something away from someone (no matter domestic or foreign)

    #solution: invest every USD + EUR + Peso in your own #INDEPENDENCE from #financesystem #water, #food, #energy, DO IT NOW!

    #bernardlietaer youtube.com/watch?v=T9EI2PrDpmw

  25. 20/
    The Chilling Conclusion

    "Will our geological legacy be the species that understood its own deep history precisely enough... to save its own future? Or will we merely register as a short-lived, hyperthermal anomaly in the strata... just a brief, violent fever it had to break?"

    #quotes
    #ClimateChange
    #GlobalWarming
    #DeepHistory
    #hyperthermal
    #anomaly
    #Mankind
    #legacy

  26. 20/
    The Chilling Conclusion

    "Will our geological legacy be the species that understood its own deep history precisely enough... to save its own future? Or will we merely register as a short-lived, hyperthermal anomaly in the strata... just a brief, violent fever it had to break?"

    #quotes
    #ClimateChange
    #GlobalWarming
    #DeepHistory
    #hyperthermal
    #anomaly
    #Mankind
    #legacy

  27. 20/
    The Chilling Conclusion

    "Will our geological legacy be the species that understood its own deep history precisely enough... to save its own future? Or will we merely register as a short-lived, hyperthermal anomaly in the strata... just a brief, violent fever it had to break?"

    #quotes
    #ClimateChange
    #GlobalWarming
    #DeepHistory
    #hyperthermal
    #anomaly
    #Mankind
    #legacy

  28. 20/
    The Chilling Conclusion

    "Will our geological legacy be the species that understood its own deep history precisely enough... to save its own future? Or will we merely register as a short-lived, hyperthermal anomaly in the strata... just a brief, violent fever it had to break?"

    #quotes
    #ClimateChange
    #GlobalWarming
    #DeepHistory
    #hyperthermal
    #anomaly
    #Mankind
    #legacy

  29. 20/
    The Chilling Conclusion

    "Will our geological legacy be the species that understood its own deep history precisely enough... to save its own future? Or will we merely register as a short-lived, hyperthermal anomaly in the strata... just a brief, violent fever it had to break?"

    #quotes
    #ClimateChange
    #GlobalWarming
    #DeepHistory
    #hyperthermal
    #anomaly
    #Mankind
    #legacy

  30. in #monopoly #capitalism = modern day #feudalism not #education or #intelligence earns most #money, no whoever owns #assets everyone else is dependant on = #exploitation = will ultimately lead to less #innovation + destruction of #mankind,, #rich vs #poor #inequality growing rapidly = #collapse of #society thank you

    = no matter how #smart #people or #government are or act: will lose game to whoever prints #money and buys + owns the #assets (#bank, #centralbank)

    the #solution: every Dollar or Euro or Pesos invested in your own #INDEPENDENCE from the #financesystem is well invested. #water, #food, #energy, DO IT NOW!

    #taxdodgers like #apple #google #amazon + those that enable it #corrupt #governments #politicians that do nothing #jpmorgan + #centralbanks #bank #banks that do not finance #innovation #usa #china #germany #india #australia #france
    #uk #luxembourg #switzerland #caymanislands #panama #gurnsey #cityoflondon will play this #game to the bitter #fascist end and beyond

  31. in #monopoly #capitalism = modern day #feudalism not #education or #intelligence earns most #money, no whoever owns #assets everyone else is dependant on = #exploitation = will ultimately lead to less #innovation + destruction of #mankind,, #rich vs #poor #inequality growing rapidly = #collapse of #society thank you

    = no matter how #smart #people or #government are or act: will lose game to whoever prints #money and buys + owns the #assets (#bank, #centralbank)

    the #solution: every Dollar or Euro or Pesos invested in your own #INDEPENDENCE from the #financesystem is well invested. #water, #food, #energy, DO IT NOW!

    #taxdodgers like #apple #google #amazon + those that enable it #corrupt #governments #politicians that do nothing #jpmorgan + #centralbanks #bank #banks that do not finance #innovation #usa #china #germany #india #australia #france
    #uk #luxembourg #switzerland #caymanislands #panama #gurnsey #cityoflondon will play this #game to the bitter #fascist end and beyond

  32. in #monopoly #capitalism = modern day #feudalism not #education or #intelligence earns most #money, no whoever owns #assets everyone else is dependant on = #exploitation = will ultimately lead to less #innovation + destruction of #mankind,, #rich vs #poor #inequality growing rapidly = #collapse of #society thank you

    = no matter how #smart #people or #government are or act: will lose game to whoever prints #money and buys + owns the #assets (#bank, #centralbank)

    the #solution: every Dollar or Euro or Pesos invested in your own #INDEPENDENCE from the #financesystem is well invested. #water, #food, #energy, DO IT NOW!

    #taxdodgers like #apple #google #amazon + those that enable it #corrupt #governments #politicians that do nothing #jpmorgan + #centralbanks #bank #banks that do not finance #innovation #usa #china #germany #india #australia #france
    #uk #luxembourg #switzerland #caymanislands #panama #gurnsey #cityoflondon will play this #game to the bitter #fascist end and beyond

  33. in = modern day not or earns most , no whoever owns everyone else is dependant on = = will ultimately lead to less + destruction of ,, vs growing rapidly = of thank you

    = no matter how or are or act: will lose game to whoever prints and buys + owns the (#bank, )

    the : every Dollar or Euro or Pesos invested in your own from the is well invested. , , , DO IT NOW!

    like + those that enable it that do nothing + that do not finance
    will play this to the bitter end and beyond