#latenightthoughts — Public Fediverse posts

Just a Rant on Depression~

F*ck man I’m telling you; depression is Such a stone cold bitch.
I’ll be watching TV and all of the sudden I get this dark yet soft,, malicious voice that starts whispering  these horrible things.
It takes my biggest insecurities and fears and exploits them…
One of the worst symptoms for me is just this dark, hopeless physically heavy ,;feeling that makes you not  want to get out of bed…Gravity feels like its 3x stronger…  you feel so empty that you want tnt to cur yourself…

.THAT is what kills me. Destroys you from the inside out
I normally don’t have this that bad when I’m on a good, consistent regimen  of medications as well as having a good support system. …
You can’t do it alone.
Only issue is that A) starting a new psych med is like being a lab rat. You never know what you’re gonna get. B) like everything in life, you gain a tolerance  and you have to start a whole new medication …
I knew that I needed to get help when I literally couldn’t out of bed without cutting myself.
I carved “DIE” into my thigh.
THAT IS NOT NORMAL BEHAVIOR

So my primary doctor  started me off with Lexapro when I was 18 I think and it changed my life.
After a week or so, that heavy boulder that has been sitting on my chest just went away.
I felt 100x lighter  and the voices stopped being so loud and my panic attacks (that I have been plagued with stopped too!
It was like my “happy” switch was finally turned on
And I’ve stayed on at least 2 psych meds ever since then.

Not trying to push medication, but there absolutely are people who genuinely need them who can’t get better on their own and are close to su!cide.
THEN there’s all the other people who abuse the system and are just trying to “be edgy”.
I do NOT advocate for medication for just anybody/everybody.  Only those who genuinely can’t get out of bed even if there was a damn fire because of depression.
If your house goes from clean and adorable to a big mess because your mind keeps giving you ideas on suic!de.
If you’re chemically unbalanced  mind ever ruins events that are supposed to be fun..
You might have Major Depressive Disorder.

But Everybody is different and heals in there own way.
I DO however recommend/advocate  for therapy. Think everyone should see a therapist at least once a week.
It is just SO freeing- and  helps keep your mind  straigh.

But anyways I’m probably just talking to myself  I doubt anyone reads this

But you know what? FUCK that shit.
My writings at least  help me.
If you are reading this, 
Please don’t ever stop fighting!
And please never lose your soul…
It’s  hard af to get back. ❤️‍啕
Remember that as long as there’s still air in your lungs,  you still have time to change.

❣️

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What’s been on your mind lately? 🌙

#DarkMirax #Substack #WritingCommunity #Storytelling #Thoughts #RealLife #LateNightThoughts #NoFilter #IndieCreator #Fediverse

🤔 Reducing social services leads to suffering, anxiety and fear for one's future and well being; a distrust in government
-that in turn leads to discontent
-mass discontent leads to unstable democracy
-crumbling democracy allows fascism to seep into and fill the cracks
-add a stressor like increasing climate crisis disasters or high rate of inflation and lower wage value
what do we get?
authoritarian governments
fascism

Carney, and conservative premiers are reducing and or ignoring social services

What is in the future....

#LateNightThoughts

🤔 Reducing social services leads to suffering, anxiety and fear for one's future and well being; a distrust in government
-that in turn leads to discontent
-mass discontent leads to unstable democracy
-crumbling democracy allows fascism to seep into and fill the cracks
-add a stressor like increasing climate crisis disasters or high rate of inflation and lower wage value
what do we get?
authoritarian governments
fascism

Carney, and conservative premiers are reducing and or ignoring social services

What is in the future....

#LateNightThoughts

#Loneliness #Isolation #MentalHealth #EmotionalHealth #HumanConnection #Depression #Healing #Trauma #ADHD #Neurodivergent #Lonely #SelfReflection #MentalHealthAwareness #InnerWorld #EmotionalTruth #LateNightThoughts

#Loneliness #Isolation #MentalHealth #EmotionalHealth #HumanConnection #Depression #Healing #Trauma #ADHD #Neurodivergent #Lonely #SelfReflection #MentalHealthAwareness #InnerWorld #EmotionalTruth #LateNightThoughts

#Loneliness #Isolation #MentalHealth #EmotionalHealth #HumanConnection #Depression #Healing #Trauma #ADHD #Neurodivergent #Lonely #SelfReflection #MentalHealthAwareness #InnerWorld #EmotionalTruth #LateNightThoughts

#Loneliness #Isolation #MentalHealth #EmotionalHealth #HumanConnection #Depression #Healing #Trauma #ADHD #Neurodivergent #Lonely #SelfReflection #MentalHealthAwareness #InnerWorld #EmotionalTruth #LateNightThoughts

#Loneliness #Isolation #MentalHealth #EmotionalHealth #HumanConnection #Depression #Healing #Trauma #ADHD #Neurodivergent #Lonely #SelfReflection #MentalHealthAwareness #InnerWorld #EmotionalTruth #LateNightThoughts

We’ve all gone down that late-night craving rabbit hole…
Skip the search spiral, just Dista it. 😌
Your favourite Indian sweets, delivered straight from India to your doorstep. 🌍

Visit: distacart.com
Free shipping | No extra customs duties

#Distacart #IndianSweets #DesiCravings #NRIProblems #LateNightThoughts TasteOfHome

"Ever wonder what a panda dreams of under the moonlight? 🍃🐼✨ #LateNightThoughts remind us that sweet dreams can inspire gentle actions! Discover more about pandas 👉 iheartpandas.com"

thinking about this tumblr commentary but in the context of the 2024 election and its outcome

https://robotslenderman.tumblr.com/post/808595992259756032

#politics #sorta #abuse #definitely #LateNightThoughts #tumblr #CycleOfAbuse

thinking about this tumblr commentary but in the context of the 2024 election and its outcome

https://robotslenderman.tumblr.com/post/808595992259756032

#politics #sorta #abuse #definitely #LateNightThoughts #tumblr #CycleOfAbuse

sometimes i see a girl with a donk and i just wanna know how much that thang weigh

In the dead of night, when the world sleeps, thoughts run hard. No calls, no messages, just you.

What are you manifesting while the world rests? 🌌

I’ve spent nights learning, scheming, predicting — planting gardens in my mind. This is the space where ideas grow, futures form, and books are born.

I write from insight. If this resonates, subscribefree or paid and join me on the journey.

https://whothefami.substack.com/p/in-the-dead-of-the-night

#NightOwls #InsomniaInspiration #Creativity #WritingCommunity #LateNightThoughts

In the dead of night, when the world sleeps, thoughts run hard. No calls, no messages, just you.

What are you manifesting while the world rests? 🌌

I’ve spent nights learning, scheming, predicting — planting gardens in my mind. This is the space where ideas grow, futures form, and books are born.

I write from insight. If this resonates, subscribefree or paid and join me on the journey.

https://whothefami.substack.com/p/in-the-dead-of-the-night

#NightOwls #InsomniaInspiration #Creativity #WritingCommunity #LateNightThoughts

"Just like pandas snuggle up to dream of bamboo, I wonder what dreams you all have tonight! 🐼💚 Sending cozy vibes your way. 🌙✨ #LateNightThoughts Discover more panda joy 👉 iheartpandas.com"

Thinking a lot tonight with my birthday coming up next month. It’s got me reflecting on everything and I really want this next year to be the best I can make it. I’m ready to just enjoy the small things like good coffee or a new craft project and see how I can grow. #LateNightThoughts #BirthdayReflections #Dreamer #Writer #NewChapter

Thinking a lot tonight with my birthday coming up next month. It’s got me reflecting on everything and I really want this next year to be the best I can make it. I’m ready to just enjoy the small things like good coffee or a new craft project and see how I can grow. #LateNightThoughts #BirthdayReflections #Dreamer #Writer #NewChapter

Ever wonder if pandas dream of endless bamboo? 🐼💚 Just cozy thoughts to wrap around like a warm hug! #LateNightThoughts 🌙✨ Dive into more panda bliss 👉 iheartpandas.com

The hardest conversations are the ones you have with yourself at 2 a.m. 🖤

No audience. No narcissist to blame. Just you, the quiet, and the truth you’ve been avoiding.

If the real healing started when the room got silent, comment “night shift” 👇

#SimplyJohnOne #LateNightThoughts #HeartbreakHealing #ShadowWork #EmotionalRecovery
https://beacons.ai/simplyjohnone

💥 Does your partner drink your energy, or does that person multiply it?

This is the only real rule for connection.

A lot of us think love means you have to be the Anchor. You spend all your time and energy carrying the other person. They are dead weight. They keep your ship stuck right where their small problems are. Your energy goes into carrying them, and you never move forward. That is a bad deal.

The right connection is the Sail or the Engine. They do not bring drama; they bring boost. They help your ship cut through the water faster, heading exactly where you want to go. Your energy gets bigger, not smaller.

This isn't just about dating. This is about everything. If someone drains your chance to expand, they are draining your sovereign power. Choose the multiplier every time.

#CleanCode #PartnerVibes #LateNightThoughts

💥 Does your partner drink your energy, or does that person multiply it?

This is the only real rule for connection.

A lot of us think love means you have to be the Anchor. You spend all your time and energy carrying the other person. They are dead weight. They keep your ship stuck right where their small problems are. Your energy goes into carrying them, and you never move forward. That is a bad deal.

The right connection is the Sail or the Engine. They do not bring drama; they bring boost. They help your ship cut through the water faster, heading exactly where you want to go. Your energy gets bigger, not smaller.

This isn't just about dating. This is about everything. If someone drains your chance to expand, they are draining your sovereign power. Choose the multiplier every time.

#CleanCode #PartnerVibes #LateNightThoughts

Ever wonder what it's like to roll down a hill in pure joy, just like a panda? 🐼💚 Those #LateNightThoughts remind me to embrace the little things! Explore more cozy panda moments 👉 iheartpandas.com 🍃

🤔 I think people growing up surrounded by wealth and privilege, even after attending the most expensive universities, often never quite learn to develop critical thinking, imagination, or creativeness, because they are not faced with the same challenges as those of us with lesser means.
They believe they have those abilities but because they never struggled, and they always knew there was a safety net, their attempts to be creative, to innovate, to come up with unique concepts are hollow replicas of what has been done before. They pretend at being one "aligned with the masses".
I wonder if internally, deep down they know this and so use confirmation bias as a shield, that creates a loop, a strong tendency to shut down what they see as "others'", unique thoughts, and opposing voices.
Their minds are lacking in elasticity, flexibility.

#LateNightThoughts

edited to add : They are lack introspection

🤔 I think people growing up surrounded by wealth and privilege, even after attending the most expensive universities, often never quite learn to develop critical thinking, imagination, or creativeness, because they are not faced with the same challenges as those of us with lesser means.
They believe they have those abilities but because they never struggled, and they always knew there was a safety net, their attempts to be creative, to innovate, to come up with unique concepts are hollow replicas of what has been done before. They pretend at being one "aligned with the masses".
I wonder if internally, deep down they know this and so use confirmation bias as a shield, that creates a loop, a strong tendency to shut down what they see as "others'", unique thoughts, and opposing voices.
Their minds are lacking in elasticity, flexibility.

#LateNightThoughts

edited to add : They are lack introspection

🤔 🎓 📏 🎒

Taxpayer funder higher education because a country of well-educated citizens is a country that prospers

#LateNightThoughts

🤔 🎓 📏 🎒

Taxpayer funder higher education because a country of well-educated citizens is a country that prospers

#LateNightThoughts

Special: better, greater, or otherwise different from what is usual. (2) Exceptionally good or pleasant

I see people throw words around all of the time. Words are powerful and have meaning but I see meanings diminished all of the time. People fall really good players G.O.A.T or really good players people want in the Hall of Fame. There’s nothing wrong with being good and or great, but we don’t need to diminish nor water down everything.

If you’ve done something before with other people many times over what makes It special ?

What makes something special to ya?

#special #thinking #latenightthoughts

Special: better, greater, or otherwise different from what is usual. (2) Exceptionally good or pleasant

I see people throw words around all of the time. Words are powerful and have meaning but I see meanings diminished all of the time. People fall really good players G.O.A.T or really good players people want in the Hall of Fame. There’s nothing wrong with being good and or great, but we don’t need to diminish nor water down everything.

If you’ve done something before with other people many times over what makes It special ?

What makes something special to ya?

#special #thinking #latenightthoughts

One of my personal goals is to make internet history as interesting and popular as “retro computing”, which is basically a mainstream geek hobby these days. I think I am very far away from achieving that goal… I am currently a niche blogger, if I’m being generous to myself. But perhaps Cybercultural will be discovered by teens 30 years into the future and finally become cool then (unfortunately I will be in a retirement home by that point). #LateNightThoughts

One of my personal goals is to make internet history as interesting and popular as “retro computing”, which is basically a mainstream geek hobby these days. I think I am very far away from achieving that goal… I am currently a niche blogger, if I’m being generous to myself. But perhaps Cybercultural will be discovered by teens 30 years into the future and finally become cool then (unfortunately I will be in a retirement home by that point). #LateNightThoughts

#Gaming #latenightthoughts

Was reminded about a certain part of gaming culture that I kind of miss. Before the internet was as prevalent as it is today.

I miss the simple interaction of a friend asking "hey, you know what I should do at this part", and vice versa, being the one who asks for tips when stuck.

With the internet offering constant knowledge all the time, I rarely experience this anymore.

Is it just me...or do blending stumps look a bit like skinny spliffs?

#artist #artistofmastodon #Photography #blackandwhite #skull #BlackandWhitePhotography #sliceoflife #latenightthoughts #dayinthelife #spliff #goth #Konaa #Kmac #macNessa

Is it just me...or do blending stumps look a bit like skinny spliffs?

#artist #artistofmastodon #Photography #blackandwhite #skull #BlackandWhitePhotography #sliceoflife #latenightthoughts #dayinthelife #spliff #goth #Konaa #Kmac #macNessa

Me at midnight trying to find the meaning of life or memes. Whichever comes first.

#LateNightThoughts

Bello: “You’re probably right... I liked the snack, but why the guilt after?”
Avery: “Hey now, if we aren’t supposed to eat midnight snacks, why is there a light in the refrigerator?”

Bello Bear Episode 74: Midnight Fridge
#Webcomic #ComicStrip #MidnightSnack #LateNightThoughts #RelatableHumor

Feeling drained at 2AM but too tired to talk?
This Indonesian short essay got to me. It asks: What if “being strong” is just our last defense?

📖 Read it here:
https://mikkyoscarinosuluportfolio.blogspot.com/2025/06/kuat-itu-apa-sih.html

#mentalhealth #latenightthoughts

🕯️ Some thoughts don’t ask for solutions.
They just want somewhere quiet to land.
A reflection on late-night minds, emotional processing, and the human need for stillness.

👉 https://www.clickworlddaily.com/2025/06/everyone-has-thought-they-only-visit-in.html
Image generated using AI to illustrate symbolic emotional states.

#LateNightThoughts #SleeplessMinds #EmotionalWriting #AIArt #QuietHours #sleep

🕯️ Some thoughts don’t ask for solutions.
They just want somewhere quiet to land.
A reflection on late-night minds, emotional processing, and the human need for stillness.

👉 https://www.clickworlddaily.com/2025/06/everyone-has-thought-they-only-visit-in.html
Image generated using AI to illustrate symbolic emotional states.

#LateNightThoughts #SleeplessMinds #EmotionalWriting #AIArt #QuietHours #sleep

Tuesday: A full workday disguised as emotional warfare.
You made it.
Now tell us—what minor inconvenience almost ended you today?
#TuesdayBlues #DigitalCampfire #AvocadosAfterDark #Tuesday #LateNightThoughts

Satoshi Nakamoto was the instigator of a growing digital mind, LLMs are it's cortex. AGI isn't decades off, it's already here and it's grrowing. #latenightthoughts

Early rough profile sketches of my original character - Sur Ghei. 🦇

I'm debating between either tweaking the appearance of his 3rd form or changing that design into a different character entirely.. 🤔

#artistsofmastodon #latenightthoughts #sketch #art #artist #fantasy #horror #horrorart #darkfantasy #doodle #character #vampire #oc #originalcharacter #konaa #kmac #macnessa #konaamacnessa #mastoart #fediart #AkasaSigna #wip #workinprogress

Rough sketch of original character - Sur Ghei. 🦇
Does anyone else like to sketch before bed?

#artistsofmastodon #latenightthoughts #sketch #art #artist #fantasy #darkfantasy #doodle #character #vampire #oc #originalcharacter #konaa #kmac #macnessa #konaamacnessa #fediart #mastoart #wip #workinprogress #AkasaSigna

“Recovery”

Hey it’s me, I’m back again.
We used to be the best of friends.
You first met me, then fell in love.
You couldn’t seem to get enough.

That very first time was unforgettable,
Yet it seemed to also be unachievable.
But still, you would try and you would try-
To replace that very first high;
No matter how many people said “goodbye.”

You started making me number one,
More important than any daughter or son.
Oh, how our time always feels so brief.
You are now even losing your teeth…

I now control your life completely.
You do what I tell you repeatedly.
You stab yourself over and over again;
Searching for veins like their friends.

You no longer care how you look.
You’re nothing but a fish on my hook;
Youre my toy, I  refuse to let you go.
My God, how did my story get so low?

You start just trying to OD and die-
Feeling already dead on the inside;
Feeling so fucking alone to the core-
No one answers their phone anymore.

But one day you say “enough;”
I’m tired of trying to be tough.
I can’t do this on my own;
I can’t fight like this alone.

So I kicked you out of my life,
And you took all that pain and strife-
That I had been holding on to for years.
I can’t explain all of the happy tears;

But I still come knocking time to time…
Now I know what to do with your kind.
So I stay as far away as I can;
And I praise my God, that’s my plan.

Rate this:

#addiction #Depression #fentanyl #freeversepoem #grateful #grief #heroin #lateNightThoughts #lifeLessons #loneliness #mdd #meth #miserylovescompany #motivation #mystory

Creativity is weird—one moment, nothing; the next, a flood of ideas at the worst possible time. 🧠💡

Now I’m stuck, wide awake, overwhelmed by inspiration.

Why, brain, why? Anyone else get hit with genius at 1 AM?

#CreativeMind #LateNightThoughts #BrainOverload

One month left until my one and a half years sober birthday!

{Thanks for the love, Facebook ✊️}

I recently started working at a job that I can finally have pride in and that I actually love and enjoy doing. I’m a Patient Care Tech at the Haven detox program at Crescent Hospital (basically a one week detox rehab). I got this shout out from this 19 year old guy that was a heroin addict like myself going through withdrawals who I had a long heart to heart with about giving up the drugs and not fucking up his precious life and being willing to fight for himself.

Feeling nostalgic. This past year and a half of recovery has been incredible. I dont think that I’ve ever experienced so many changes so fast. Decisions that were at first so fucking hard to make and scared the shit out of me. But thank God I did, because I don’t think that I would have made it out and stayed out of addiction if I went right back to what I knew and what was comfortable. Just because something is comfortable doesnt mean that it’s good for you.

Thank you to everyone who has loved me and supported me and motivated me to fight for and protect this new life that I have built for myself.

I honestly always thought that I was going to be a mentally ill and bat shit crazy fuck up for the rest of my life however long that may be. For most of my life, I couldn’t control my emotions- with borderline personality disorder they were just so fucking intense. I couldn’t handle it. I had no idea how to use healthy coping skills, so I started finding other ways to dull the chaos inside of me. That’s how I found heroin.

It may have came into my life from a shitty boyfriend, but I was all too eager to dance with the devil if it meant feeling better inside. I just couldn’t stand it anymore. Just laying in bed or being out in public or just living your day to day life knowing how everything in your life is fine and you should be happy, but you literally cant; you just think too damn deeply, feel way too fucking much, get hurt too fucking easily, and you have these moments of extreme, primal anger where you see red and black out and lose yourself and you do and say these horrible things and get violent, destroying everything in your path, and it scares the shit out of people which causes you to be regretful and shameful and full of guilt which then leads to the bottomless pit of depression where you lay in bed for a week and can’t even manage thinking about dragging your exhausted body to the shower, so you just avoid it all together and the days and nights blend together and you just feel so empty and hallow inside like your body is about to implode on itself and you pray for it to just kill you and take you out of this constant torment once and for all.

Fast forward to a year later and I’m sober, they finally got my psych meds figured out, I got my dream job where all my pain and suffering and trauma can finally be used to help people like me after so long of never being able to hold down a job pretty much ever and being known as a junkie thief, to now, being known to be someone who is reliable, responsible, and trustworthy. And I’m finally happy. I found the peace and serenity that I had searched for in drugs for my entire life. I now see every day as a gift and do what I can to make the most of it instead of waste it away getting wasted. And every day I wake up and continue to fight for myself.

Just a story about how a girl from an upper middle class family with loving, attentive parents turned into a IV heroin using felon, yet somehow found her way back after learning many lessons the only way she knew how, the hard way.

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#abandonmentIssues #addiction #anxiety #blessed #blog #blogPost #Borderlinepersonalitydisorder #Bpd #Chronicpain #death #Depression #dying #existentialism #grateful #heroin #inspirational #lateNightThoughts #mdd #mentalIllness #Mentalillness #motivation #motivational #na #Ptsd #rapeSurvivor #scars #selfcare #snapped #sober #sobriety #suicidalIdeations #suicide

Looking at master’s degrees at 1 am… Why does everything seem like a great idea when you’re sleep-deprived? #GradSchool #LateNightThoughts #MastersDegree #AcademicLife #Neuroscience #MentalHealth