#joanmastodon — Public Fediverse posts
Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #joanmastodon, aggregated by home.social.
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I'd rather be a "race traitor" than a traitor to the human race.
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"I don't cry for myself. I weep for humanity."
#JoanMastodon #TTJ -
Dinner came to an end, and several of the assembled knights opened up their refurbished Psions and Apple Newtons to commence the evening's jestposting.
Our Lady Joan Mastodon finished her bowl of rhubarb crumble (she loved rhubarb crumble and always took seconds), then she spoke:
Remember, my friends, we toot for The Now. Don't toot for the archives. There's no chisel and marble in the Fediverse, my friends, only our frail temporary voices, heard in the moment, then forgotten. Jest away. And thank you, Sir Alfred, for tonight's rhubarb crumble. It was very good. You've surpassed yourself.
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"A lot of people probably think that Fairies Wear Boots for the fashion.
Turns out, it's for kicking the fash in."
#JoanMastodon -
"A lot of people probably think that Fairies Wear Boots for the fashion.
Turns out, it's for kicking the fash in."
#JoanMastodon -
"A lot of people probably think that Fairies Wear Boots for the fashion.
Turns out, it's for kicking the fash in."
#JoanMastodon -
"A lot of people probably think that Fairies Wear Boots for the fashion.
Turns out, it's for kicking the fash in."
#JoanMastodon -
"A lot of people probably think that Fairies Wear Boots for the fashion.
Turns out, it's for kicking the fash in."
#JoanMastodon -
RE: https://universeodon.com/@SrRochardBunson/116536105094800003
"The best time to hang nazis and confederates was 1945 & 1865, respectively.
The 2nd best time is today."
#JoanMastodon #DieNaziScum -
@notsoloud Behind some rose bushes in a perma-garden, a woman giggles: it's #JoanMastodon in the role of Jane Marple. Slowly, she searches her magnifyer glass and asks: Who was wearing that costume of a black weevil last Wednesday? Could she find any connections to the Sporespondence writer's club?
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Young Reginald had not tooted much since he had joined the fellowship. Inevitably, some of the lads from the louder side of the table turned him into unflattering memes. For a while, "Why don't you go Reginald!" was how they told each other to shut up.
Our Lady Joan Mastodon did not like it.
"Our Reggie is with us," she said one evening as they sat by the fire, "I enjoy his company. Don't you?"
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RE: https://todon.nl/@burnoutqueen/116499935591904808
🎯
"Whatever freedoms and rights you excuse for "the other" will leave no excuse for yours."
#JoanMastodon #TTJ -
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"Beware the man that builds monuments to himself.
Do not be where the rapist pedophile builds monuments to himself. GTFO or light a fire."
##JoanMastodon #TTJ -
250 years is a pretty good run, right?
If we haven't overcame the original sin of slavery by now, maybe orange man is doing us a favor by exposing the rot?
Don't get me wrong, though. #FuckTrump and all of the oligarchs. I'm just saying, let's get the mourning done and start to rebuild BEFORE the crash.
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RE: https://todon.nl/@burnoutqueen/116474263674952858
Through the transitive 😉 properties of revolution, the fact that many people are revolutionaries just because they exist, makes me want/no, need to be a revolutionary as well. If not, I sure as hell can't claim to be an ally.
#TransRights are #HumanRights & I am for humanity.
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RE: https://kolektiva.social/@arrrg/116465682492118723
"The way I see it, there's 2 ways this can go. Being serfs in a "Technological Republic" or revolution. Neither option is fun, but 1 enslaves future generations while the other has potential upside. Whatdayahave?"
#JoanMastodon -
"The only good oligarch, is a trebuchet'd oligarch."
#JoanMastodon #TTJ -
Consistency is a sin.
Joan Mastodon, The Suppressed Sayings. Appleseed Press, Wealdstone (2026). Aphorism 77.
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"A good hashtag messes things up. Our hashtags are not the harvested grain in the warehouse, they are the wild seeds dispersed in unknown directions by the violent storm."
Joan Mastodon, The Suppressed Sayings. Appleseed Press, Wealdstone (2026). Aphorism 31.
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#JoanMastodon #SherlockHolmes #ActivityPub
I was blind to the obvious, Watson. I realised too late just how far and deep Moriarty has spun his fiendish network. Every minister and undersecretary in Whitehall, the CEO and CTO of every major corporation, the heads of our learned institutions, they all are part of Professor Moriarty's vast attention channelling machine. I cannot even trust Mycroft any more.
Our intriguing visitor has provided us with the most ingenious antidote, my friend. Lady Joan (his tone changed as he said the mysterious woman's name) has found a way to let people speak outside the Professor's net. Her strange Protocol is far from elegant, but it is immune to Moriarty's spell. Lady Joan (again, his voice became warmer as he said her name) wields this clumsy weapon with natural grace and with surprising efficiency. Her followers are an awkward lot; we will join them. Ah, I hear someone at the door. Joan has arrived!
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#JoanMastodon #SherlockHolmes #ActivityPub
I was blind to the obvious, Watson. I realised too late just how far and deep Moriarty has spun his fiendish network. Every minister and undersecretary in Whitehall, the CEO and CTO of every major corporation, the heads of our learned institutions, they all are part of Professor Moriarty's vast attention channelling machine. I cannot even trust Mycroft any more.
Our intriguing visitor has provided us with the most ingenious antidote, my friend. Lady Joan (his tone changed as he said the mysterious woman's name) has found a way to let people speak outside the Professor's net. Her strange Protocol is far from elegant, but it is immune to Moriarty's spell. Lady Joan (again, his voice became warmer as he said her name) wields this clumsy weapon with natural grace and with surprising efficiency. Her followers are an awkward lot; we will join them. Ah, I hear someone at the door. Joan has arrived!
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#JoanMastodon #SherlockHolmes #ActivityPub
I was blind to the obvious, Watson. I realised too late just how far and deep Moriarty has spun his fiendish network. Every minister and undersecretary in Whitehall, the CEO and CTO of every major corporation, the heads of our learned institutions, they all are part of Professor Moriarty's vast attention channelling machine. I cannot even trust Mycroft any more.
Our intriguing visitor has provided us with the most ingenious antidote, my friend. Lady Joan (his tone changed as he said the mysterious woman's name) has found a way to let people speak outside the Professor's net. Her strange Protocol is far from elegant, but it is immune to Moriarty's spell. Lady Joan (again, his voice became warmer as he said her name) wields this clumsy weapon with natural grace and with surprising efficiency. Her followers are an awkward lot; we will join them. Ah, I hear someone at the door. Joan has arrived!
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#JoanMastodon #SherlockHolmes #ActivityPub
I was blind to the obvious, Watson. I realised too late just how far and deep Moriarty has spun his fiendish network. Every minister and undersecretary in Whitehall, the CEO and CTO of every major corporation, the heads of our learned institutions, they all are part of Professor Moriarty's vast attention channelling machine. I cannot even trust Mycroft any more.
Our intriguing visitor has provided us with the most ingenious antidote, my friend. Lady Joan (his tone changed as he said the mysterious woman's name) has found a way to let people speak outside the Professor's net. Her strange Protocol is far from elegant, but it is immune to Moriarty's spell. Lady Joan (again, his voice became warmer as he said her name) wields this clumsy weapon with natural grace and with surprising efficiency. Her followers are an awkward lot; we will join them. Ah, I hear someone at the door. Joan has arrived!
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#JoanMastodon #SherlockHolmes #ActivityPub
I was blind to the obvious, Watson. I realised too late just how far and deep Moriarty has spun his fiendish network. Every minister and undersecretary in Whitehall, the CEO and CTO of every major corporation, the heads of our learned institutions, they all are part of Professor Moriarty's vast attention channelling machine. I cannot even trust Mycroft any more.
Our intriguing visitor has provided us with the most ingenious antidote, my friend. Lady Joan (his tone changed as he said the mysterious woman's name) has found a way to let people speak outside the Professor's net. Her strange Protocol is far from elegant, but it is immune to Moriarty's spell. Lady Joan (again, his voice became warmer as he said her name) wields this clumsy weapon with natural grace and with surprising efficiency. Her followers are an awkward lot; we will join them. Ah, I hear someone at the door. Joan has arrived!
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Mrs Hudson had brought them tea. My friend and his guest sat close together and spoke intensely for a long time. At the end they both rose and performed what appeared to be a curious little ritual. They both raised their right arms, formed fists, and bumped their fists gently into each other, sharing a conspiratory smile. Most extraordinary. I admit I could not help blushing a little when I saw it.
Later that evening Holmes came to my study. Our visitor is a remarkable woman and our most powerful ally yet, Watson. Lady Joan will join me again tomorrow, I will take her to Imperial College to meet my old friend Professor Forthlisp. I need you to do some research for me, Watson. Find out what you can about something called the ActivityPub Protocol. I don't want to trouble Lady Joan with too many questions that have obvious answers. She really is the most remarkable woman, Watson.
#SherlockHolmes #JoanMastodon #HolmesAndWatson #SherlockAndJoan #ActivityPub
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Mrs Hudson had brought them tea. My friend and his guest sat close together and spoke intensely for a long time. At the end they both rose and performed what appeared to be a curious little ritual. They both raised their right arms, formed fists, and bumped their fists gently into each other, sharing a conspiratory smile. Most extraordinary. I admit I could not help blushing a little when I saw it.
Later that evening Holmes came to my study. Our visitor is a remarkable woman and our most powerful ally yet, Watson. Lady Joan will join me again tomorrow, I will take her to Imperial College to meet my old friend Professor Forthlisp. I need you to do some research for me, Watson. Find out what you can about something called the ActivityPub Protocol. I don't want to trouble Lady Joan with too many questions that have obvious answers. She really is the most remarkable woman, Watson.
#SherlockHolmes #JoanMastodon #HolmesAndWatson #SherlockAndJoan #ActivityPub
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Mrs Hudson had brought them tea. My friend and his guest sat close together and spoke intensely for a long time. At the end they both rose and performed what appeared to be a curious little ritual. They both raised their right arms, formed fists, and bumped their fists gently into each other, sharing a conspiratory smile. Most extraordinary. I admit I could not help blushing a little when I saw it.
Later that evening Holmes came to my study. Our visitor is a remarkable woman and our most powerful ally yet, Watson. Lady Joan will join me again tomorrow, I will take her to Imperial College to meet my old friend Professor Forthlisp. I need you to do some research for me, Watson. Find out what you can about something called the ActivityPub Protocol. I don't want to trouble Lady Joan with too many questions that have obvious answers. She really is the most remarkable woman, Watson.
#SherlockHolmes #JoanMastodon #HolmesAndWatson #SherlockAndJoan #ActivityPub
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Mrs Hudson had brought them tea. My friend and his guest sat close together and spoke intensely for a long time. At the end they both rose and performed what appeared to be a curious little ritual. They both raised their right arms, formed fists, and bumped their fists gently into each other, sharing a conspiratory smile. Most extraordinary. I admit I could not help blushing a little when I saw it.
Later that evening Holmes came to my study. Our visitor is a remarkable woman and our most powerful ally yet, Watson. Lady Joan will join me again tomorrow, I will take her to Imperial College to meet my old friend Professor Forthlisp. I need you to do some research for me, Watson. Find out what you can about something called the ActivityPub Protocol. I don't want to trouble Lady Joan with too many questions that have obvious answers. She really is the most remarkable woman, Watson.
#SherlockHolmes #JoanMastodon #HolmesAndWatson #SherlockAndJoan #ActivityPub
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Mrs Hudson had brought them tea. My friend and his guest sat close together and spoke intensely for a long time. At the end they both rose and performed what appeared to be a curious little ritual. They both raised their right arms, formed fists, and bumped their fists gently into each other, sharing a conspiratory smile. Most extraordinary. I admit I could not help blushing a little when I saw it.
Later that evening Holmes came to my study. Our visitor is a remarkable woman and our most powerful ally yet, Watson. Lady Joan will join me again tomorrow, I will take her to Imperial College to meet my old friend Professor Forthlisp. I need you to do some research for me, Watson. Find out what you can about something called the ActivityPub Protocol. I don't want to trouble Lady Joan with too many questions that have obvious answers. She really is the most remarkable woman, Watson.
#SherlockHolmes #JoanMastodon #HolmesAndWatson #SherlockAndJoan #ActivityPub
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Never let a toot have more than 743 characters.
[Joan Mastodon, The Salisbury Aphorisms, Book II, Part 1, maxim 59.]
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Ma'am, it's an honour to make your acquaintance.
Holmes was unusually formal and shy, I had never seen him like that, except once when we met the young Duchess of Arcadia in the Curious Case of The Lost Password.
The pleasure is mine, Sir, I have heard so much about you and your work. Our visitor blushed as she said this.
I will need your help, Sir. We are a small fellowship fighting a formidable enemy, The Great Algo. He has powerful allies, including the Gang of the Starmarians. I believe you know them. My knights tell me that you fight the Starmarians yourself.
How interesting, Ma'am. How very interesting. Please sit down. My associate Watson will ask Mrs Hudson to bring us some tea, won't you, Watson.
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Normalize pseudonyms, noms de guerre, plurality & changing names. (Not you #JDVance, you #CreepyWeirdo)
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@PhoenixSerenity :hearthands:
"Move slow & fix things"
#JoanMastodon -
As the feast in the Great Hall came to a close, our Lady Joan Mastodon stood up and recited Tennyson:
She left the web, she left the loom //
She made three paces thro' the room //
She saw the water-flower bloom, //
She saw the helmet and the plume, //
She look'd down to Camelot. //
Out flew the web and floated wide; //
The mirror crack'd from side to side; //
'The curse is come upon me,' cried //
The Lady of Shalott. //Damn all towers, our Lady exclaimed, to the approving murmur of the assembled knights. The curse is on the tower, not on Elaine. Toot and you shall live.
There was buzz in the Great Hall. Sir Juniper started reciting the whole poem, but he was ignored. The knights rose, "Toot and you shall live", they cheered again and again. Our Lady Joan smiled.
#JoanMastodon #AlfredTennyson #TheLadyOfShalott #ElaineOfAstolat #JoanAintElaine
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RE: https://mastodon.world/@paninid/116412042003049118
"We are in the process of the second American Revolution, which will remain bloodless if the left allows it to be."
#KevinRoberts #HeritageFoundation #Project2025"I have less political power because they’re importing a brand-new electorate. Why should I sit back and take that?"
#TuckerCarlson #GreatReplacement"It's really weird to be living through history."
#JoanMastodon #TTJ -
RE: https://toot.cat/@androcat/116408703863399864
"It's ALL one fight & #billionaires are the problem.
Solve it."
#JoanMastodon #TTJ -
"Take it easy, but take it!" ✊
#TomMorello"If you saw someone stealing food, no you didn't!"
#JoanMastodon #TTJ -
"Take it easy, but take it!" ✊
#TomMorello"If you saw someone stealing food, no you didn't!"
#JoanMastodon #TTJ -
"Take it easy, but take it!" ✊
#TomMorello"If you saw someone stealing food, no you didn't!"
#JoanMastodon #TTJ -
"Take it easy, but take it!" ✊
#TomMorello"If you saw someone stealing food, no you didn't!"
#JoanMastodon #TTJ -
"Take it easy, but take it!" ✊
#TomMorello"If you saw someone stealing food, no you didn't!"
#JoanMastodon #TTJ -
Sir Wahnfried was the odd member of our Lady Joan's fellowship. He kept to himself and never joined the gatherings in the Great Hall. Every day he posted news on his meals, which were simple and varied little.
"G'Morning, Fedifellows, breakfast time. Porridge today.", he posted every morning.
Occasionally he also posted in the evening. "Dinner time, my Fedifriends, mutton stew today. May you all stay healthy."
The knights ignored him mostly, though there were those who faithfully boosted each of his toots. When he mentioned a special dish, there was some friendly banter in the replies. His toot about his Apple Crumble went viral, surpassing even Sir Galahad's Ode to the Hashtag.
The Young Turks liked to make fun of him. "Do a Wahnfried" became a popular putdown for a while.
One evening when his name came up, our Lady Joan spoke. "Toot as Wahnfried toots, my friends, and we will all be alright." The knights asked her to explain, but she would not expand.
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"A rising tide lifts all boats, but a wall of water can only destruct.
Tax and/or eat the rich or they can go and get fucked.
Worker owned co-ops are the lifeboats we need & we need to get to ship building."
#JoanMastodon#CoOp #AnarchoSyndicalism #anarchism #cooperative #cooperatives #TTJ
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Our Lady Joan Mastodon spoke to us with feeling. Follow my friend Samuel Pepys, she said to us as we gathered by the fire, he is the first and the finest of all tooters. There is no tooter like him. Even his stylistic faults are carriers of truth. If we could all toot as my Samuel toots, just for one day (she wiped a tear off her eye as she said this), the Great Algo would be gone forever.
We miss our Lady Joan. She loved as she hated, with wisdom and passion, and she loved so much more than she hated.
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Our Lady Joan Mastodon spoke to us with feeling. Follow my friend Samuel Pepys, she said to us as we gathered by the fire, he is the first and the finest of all tooters. There is no tooter like him. Even his stylistic faults are carriers of truth. If we could all toot as my Samuel toots, just for one day (she wiped a tear off her eye as she said this), the Great Algo would be gone forever.
We miss our Lady Joan. She loved as she hated, with wisdom and passion, and she loved so much more than she hated.
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Our Lady Joan Mastodon spoke to us with feeling. Follow my friend Samuel Pepys, she said to us as we gathered by the fire, he is the first and the finest of all tooters. There is no tooter like him. Even his stylistic faults are carriers of truth. If we could all toot as my Samuel toots, just for one day (she wiped a tear off her eye as she said this), the Great Algo would be gone forever.
We miss our Lady Joan. She loved as she hated, with wisdom and passion, and she loved so much more than she hated.