#fantasyromp — Public Fediverse posts

"But I magicked you a new pair!" says Fairy quickly "You never noticed, right?"
Ranger glares at them
"_Your_ fault!"
Without losing control over the duck Ranger removes a boot. A new one immediately grows around their foot. They throw away the first one, remove the second, and a third one pops out.
"I... I'm not always good with magic!"

What does Fairy have to do to remove the spell?
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"If you take me there I'll make you an endless supply of trail mix!" says Bard
"It's crap" mutters Ranger.
"I'll cook for you for the rest of your life!"
"Food's too perfect."
"_Too_ perfect???"
Bard starts to hyperventilate
"What if I never again cook your boots?"
Ranger gives them a long hard stare. Bard recoils
"I needed a midnight snack!"

Why is Ranger still wearing boots?
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"I'm adding a cure to the curse" reads Noble out loud "Rubbing the person with laser should do"
Both Bard and Noble groans.
"What?" screams Fairy "What's the problem?"
"No one's been able to make laser for hundreds of years," says Bard "The plant's extinct"
"People don't know where to look" mutters Ranger
"You can find it? If you take me there I'll..."

How do Bard bribe Ranger?
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"Weff, it'f youhf call the' " says Dragon Horse trying to not lose the rose between their lips "Loo' in th' boo'!"
Noble hands the feather and the crystal rose to Fairy and starts examining the book. It's a perfectly normal notebook, with neatly written text, but it's not ordered. Snippets of recipes are mixed with lists, diagrams, and random thoughts.

Where do they find the cure?
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Luckily Ranger sees them in time when they jump through the window. They have their mallard spread its wings. lift again, and catch them mid air. But not without a harsh
"Stupid!"
Noble makes sure Fairy and Bard stays on the feathered body, then nods at the rose between Dragon Horse's lips
"We need to reverse that! Can't be one fighter down!"

How do they reverse the spell on Himbo?
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Mechanical contraptions of the kind they saw at the bottom floor burst in, clacking ominously. Himbo shrinks in a shower of glitter, and turns into a rose. Dragon Horse gingerly picks him up with their mouth looking like they is about to dance tango. Noble grabs the things they found behind the lock and screams
"No time! Out the window!"

Pick one:
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In the meantime Noble finds himself distracted by an intricate lock. The mechanics around them is reinforced with hardwood and shining with gold, but this contraption is made of iron and looks like someone has beaten it repeatedly with a hammer. Noble picks it in less than a second and finds a crystal rose, a tattered book, and a feather.

What happens when they take them?
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"Cut it!" snaps Fairy "You're not helping!"
They bend down at the air vent where The Snake disappeared and look at the pattern of the scales. Then they look around
"Are there any ventilation maps?"
Ranger nods approvingly and points before steering the mallard down to ground. To Himbo's amazement Fairy reads and points
"Thataway!"

What do Noble find in a box in the meantime?
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Suddenly the duck sticks its head through the broken window and devours the horse.
"Good drake!" says Ranger
"My horse!" screams Noble
"Looked like a slug."
"A _slug_???"
Dragon Horse and Himbo immediately forget their differences and team up to keep Noble from trying to strangle Ranger
"Eh" says Bard "You'd just lose it on tic-tac-toe to one of the contraptions anyway"

Where now?
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"Look" shouts Fairy "The Snake!"
An iridescent tail disappears through a floor vent.
"And a horse!" says Noble, their voice vibrating in awe.
"Oh poop!" says Himbo as the desk transforms into a horse with a long flowing mane.
Dragon Horse immediately returns and transforms into a horse
"What did you say???"
"Nothing!"
"The Snake gets away!" screams Fairy

Who breaks up the conundrum?
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Ranger swings themself onto the duck, and forces it to fly out after the tube. Before anyone can say 'fowl play' Dragon Horse dragons out and follows suit. Through the broken window the other four see them ribbon around with the mallard, and hear the faint *crunch* as the small glass container is crushed by an unforgiving beak.

Unfortunately...
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"Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!" says Fairy "I thought it was the unicorn, and..."
"Hey!" says Bard "It worked!"
The mallard stands in the middle of the room, and it's as big as a horse. Ranger takes a cautious walk around it, but no snakes are left alive. At the same time they see the slug like remnants of the man slide into a tube and shoot himself out through a pipe.

What do they do?
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Then Fairy reaches into their bag, blows on their palm, and quacking hell breaks out. Gigantic wings sweeps the room, and by the thunder of webbed feet flapping against the floor the iridescent eye snakes are thrown around popping like balloons. The party can only duck and shield themselves.

Afterwards, silence.

Until Ranger says
"Too big."

In which direction does the man flee?
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The man behind the desk open his mouth, his face distorts as his lips extends and open a hole large as a bathtub. Out falls a flood of reptiles, all with uncomfortable iridescent eyes.
"Ranger!" says Fairy, "And Noble!"
The two glare at each other before Ranger produce their unsettling amount of knives and Noble a royal spear.

Then Fairy picks out?
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Himbo and Bard springs to action. Bard glances with pain at their harp before they use it as a shovel to gently scoop up snakes from the floor and fling them out through the broken window. As for Himbo he just grabs handful after handful of reptiles and do the same. As they're nearing the man Noble walks behind them with murder in their eyes.

The man's response?
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Fairy takes another look at the conveyor belt, snaps their fingers, and starts lifting off some - but not all - things from it.
"Time it!" says Ranger and grabs an iron digging bar from the belt.
They hand it to Dragon Horse, who nods and throws it straight through one of the windows. Glass pieces as big as apples snows around them.

Next one to take action?
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The man behind the desk is growing, expanding like a toad going for a croak. His eyes fixates on them with intense malice. Himbo starts to hyper ventilate
"Think! Think!"
But panic locks the thoughts of the entire party, and for a few seconds they do nothing. Then Himbo grabs a book and throws it at the man
"_It's rude to eat 'til you're full!_"

What happens next?
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"Sorry! Sorry! Sorry!" cries Fairy
Dragon Horse untangles his long, embroidered sleeve from the lever
"You don't need to apologise" they says in a calmer tone "Stress gets to us all"
With tears and snot all over their face Fairy reaches out to Ranger. Ranger secretly sighs and hands over a hanky.
"Why are you talking?" asks Himbo in panic "Don't you see!"

See what?
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Dragon Horse suddenly drops their armful of snakes, speeds through the room, and starts the conveyor belt again. The man stops screaming, because now he eats with a vengeance. The party freezes as they realise they are all holding poisonous reptiles, and still, a little bit, wants to pick more of them.
"You can't just act!" screams Dragon Horse "_Think!_"

Fairy starts crying and...
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Fairy finds the lever that controls the conveyor belt and shuts it off. The moment the man can't eat anymore he starts to scream. The sound vibrates through their muscles and pierces their bones. With it comes a hunger they've never felt before. They want everything! Now! Bleary eyed they try to pick as many snakes as possible, to start with them.

Who comes to their senses?
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The floor is covered with snakes, slithering around each other. Among them they can sometimes see an uncomfortably iridescent one. But, somehow more unsettling, is the conveyor belt directed at the man. It's full of everything, not just food, everything beautiful in the world, and he just devours it, with an absentminded smile.

Who acts first?
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"I'm okay!" anwers Bard.
Their voice is muffled by the wall pieces covering them. While Noble (bravely) helps Ranger pry loose the others jump through the hole to protect Bard from whatever is in the new room.

They find a man behind a desk. He's neither too thin or too fat, yet he seems to be eating constantly. Then they realise that the floor is moving.

Why does the floor move?
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"So this was intentional?" smirks Noble. Ranger glares and pulls their right hand loose. At the same time Dragon Horse elbows Bard hard. So hard, in fact, that Bard tumbles over the tiny room and right through the wall.
"Oh Heaven!" exclaims Dragon Horse as drywall and splinters rain around them "I forget I'm so much stronger! Are you okay?"

What's on the other side of the wall?
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The rest of the party climb the stairs, fully expecting to reach a grim scene. They find Ranger pinned to a wall by a multitude of knives, like an insect in a collection. But not one of the knives have pierced more than their clothes.
"Why did you _push_ us?" screams Himbo
"_You_ can't trigger a trap without dying."
"Did Ranger just speak a full sentence?" whispers Bard

So?
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The contraptions are closing in again, and several of the party lunges for the ladder. Fairy and Himbo knock their heads together and stumble backwards. Ranger overtakes them and runs up into the dark hole. Dragon Horse turns human and holds the other two back
"Why?" screams Himbo
They hear the horrible sound of knives grind together.
"Because it's a trap."

What happened to Ranger?
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They stare at the rickety ladder with a trail of iridescent scales leading into a dark hole. The party can climb it, and Dragon Horse can transform into human
"_Again_?"
But what to do with the cat and the unicorn?
"Why don't we make them small?" says Fairy
The others stare
"You can do that?"
"Sure!"
Soon all animals are ant sized and put in their belt bag.

Who's first up the ladder?
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As the salt boils the creature to a sizzling crisp, a small duck lands on top of the pile.
"Quack!"
Ranger glares at Bard
"_What?_"
"It _worked,_ right?"
Ranger is already half way up the pile to rescue the bird.
"Mallard" they say "young male"
"Excuse me!" says Fairy and points to the trail of iridescent scales "We still have work to do!"

Where does the trail lead?
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The tentacles are like cables, and when they chop one off it slithers away, while the creature raise a forest of new ones. They don't have any chance to reach any important parts. In the end Ranger turns to Bard
"Fix!"
Bard freezes, then picks up the harp
"Socker, grädde, nötter..."
A mountain of salt drops from the ceiling and buries the creature alive

What lands on top of the pile?
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"Don't touch those things!" mumbles Noble "If you do you'll starve no matter how much you eat!"
They soon find themselves by a glowing lake, and a strange table with a small sign.
"Back soon" reads Himbo with pride "What does _that_ mean?"
"Don't ask!" says Bard "Because..."
The surface of the lake breaks and a white slime creature of many tentacles attacks.

How do they defeat it?
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The contraptions, with rock crystal 'eyes', large wooden sprockets, and brass reinforcements, look neither like human nor animals. Yet hunger radiates from them like the cold around a winter lake. Only Himbo takes a step forward to fight, and he retreats, unsettled. Iridescent snake scales crackles under their feet as they back off and are herded deeper into the building.

Where to?
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