#eupd — Public Fediverse posts

I missed this article from 2024 and it means I could have PTSD or Complex PTSD. https://www.theguardian.com/society/article/2024/may/12/is-this-actually-ptsd-clinicians-divided-over-redefining-borderline-personality-disorder

It fits very well when the wheels came off my mind when I was 12/13 after we had moved from where the sexual abuse was happening.

Not that it would make any difference if I was relabelled - they won’t - but I wouldn’t mind saying I had PTSD whereas I tell no-one about my Borderline PD diagnosis.

#borderline #eupd #ptsd

White coats

https://hollipoppa.com/2025/11/24/hey.html

#eupd #bpd #MentalHealth

It’s never a stranger that says words that cut.

It’s rarely a friend that says words that hurt.

It’s always family.

And they know not to.

But they do.

#bpd #eupd

no, a vague smile and wave does not make it better.

You smashed a window and no matter what you do it stays smashed.

this is sh territory and you'll never know it. or care.

#bpd #eupd

Day is going okay then someone who does know better, should no better goes with an unprovoked one sentence which is an attack. They know, KNOW, it's wrong.

and my day stops.

I don't know how to describe it apart from being someone to then retreating inside me to be the smallest insignificant thing.

Pink was right - Build that wall.

#bpd #eupd

#introduction | hello world! I am a 50yr old punk called 'gif' meaning poison in dutch. i study #criminology and #psychology at the OU, I am diagnosed with #EUPD (formerly known as borderline personality disorder) and a mood disorder, I identify as non-binary, please use mx, they|him pronouns. I write about above topics from an #anarchist perspective > state and corporate crime and the criminalisation of cluster-B personality disorders. subscribe if you :) my work: https://gifsartidote.life

What are my odds of getting my MH diagnosis changed from BPD/EUPD to PTSD?

If I did get the change, what are my odds of getting real actual help?

I reckon the odds are of my digging in my neighbour's garden and finding the worlds biggest diamond.

#ptsd #bpd #eupd #diamonds

I am male. I have no memories before ~11 years old. We moved away from the area where I had attended Catholic school for several years. Little boy, #catholic priest … you know the rest.

My earliest memories are of self-harming.

A comment by a counsellor a year ago briefly opened my mind and I was mentally in a very bad place again.

So this makes perfect sense.

https://www.theguardian.com/society/article/2024/may/12/is-this-actually-ptsd-clinicians-divided-over-redefining-borderline-personality-disorder

#eupd #borderlinepersonalitydisorder #ptsd

I wonder what it must be like to wake up the same head, same thoughts every day

Two days ago something in my head took a detour. It is still detouring

Is it me?
What did I do wrong? - even though I have done nothing
Who am I really?
Would SIB be part of the answer? No

This too shall pass
That’s what my tattoo says (not in EN)

I have to wait.
I will be okay
If I wait.

#bpd #eupd

I can have 1205 #steam friends

I have 17

2 have died

6 of them are me

How many people IRL would I call a #friend?

0

How many close friends?

0

“So it goes”

#bpd #eupd #itiswhatitis #splitting

Looking at my #pinboard bookmarks I started saving #bpd links in 2012, so that'll be when I was diagnosed.
Sadly though so many of them are now dead links.

If you are curious as the mind of those of us with #bpd (also known as #eupd) the criteria are here:

https://www.verywellmind.com/borderline-personality-disorder-diagnosis-425174#toc-bpd-criteria-for-a-diagnosis

Spolier - it is horrible.

We've been to see our daughter in the hospital today.
She's slowly coming to the realisation that she's not going to be able to walk any significant distance for months, possibly years, and maybe for ever.
She doesn't see how it's going to affect her life in terms of housing, work and everything else.
I wish I could say "ah but she's a fighter" but she's not - she hasn't got that kind of mental resilience.

It's going to be a long road (as if so far hasn't been long enough)

@caregivers #disability #EUPD

We had a family meeting this morning around our daughter's care (previous toots #EUPD / #BPD related).
This was with a Very Important Person from the management of her mental health Trust.

The take away point for me was unrelated to her care but about us :
You can't have a family member with #mentalHealth issues and remain unaffected yourself. The more you try to pull yourself back to the person you once were, the more you will suffer.

Those who've been following my issues with my daughter who has #EUPD may be saddened to hear that she's made a suicide attempt in the last 36 hours leaving her in need of major life changing surgery, which is happening today.

Be kind to each other - you don't know what anyone else is going through.

#mentalHealth

FFS
The hospital has lifted our daughter's section and asked her to remain as a voluntary patient over the weekend so they can get support in place for when she is able to leave (on Tuesday).
Off course - she's on the bus back home. Of course she is.

This won't end well.

#mentalHealth #BPD #EUPD

Thank you all for the kind thoughts regarding our daughter.
It really does help.

There's no end to this in sight.
We have to learn to accept her how she is.
Nothing we can do will change her.
This is 'radical acceptable' in DBT terms.

#DBT #mentalHealth #BPD #EUPD

The crisis team called the police yesterday evening because they couldn't find our daughter (the one who suffers with #EUPD).

Her car is at home but her phone seems to be in a town on the south coast.
She hates public transport and I can't think of a connection down there.

She's not responding to calls /messages from us, freinds or family.

No news overnight. I've not slept well - unusual because I thought I was getting immune to these disappearances.

It's all very worrying

#mentalHealth

More daughter news

It seems that the hospital have been keeping her detained unlawfully - no Mental Health Act paperwork in place.

I ended up getting solicitor's advice because of that, and something else the ward staff were threatening (using the Mental Capacity Act)

Daughter is in a bad way, and I'm strongly advising her to stay put until they can find a psychiatric hospital bed for her.
This sort of thing shouldn't be happening in the #nhs in 2023.

#mentalhealth #BPD #EUPD

I've just found out that our daughter is sectioned in our local hospital, and has been since Friday.

Dealing with how she got there (no details here, sorry) is my Sunday sorted for me.

Cue loud screaming into the void.

#mentalhealth #BPD #EUPD

Thanks for the good wishes for #today - it turned out pretty much OK.

Delivered daughter's car as requested, and I seem to have found all the correct make-up in her flat.

There wasn't any drama - which was what Mrs Mike was fearing. Our daughter is in a bad way. Hospital isn't helping her (it's a poor solution for #EUPD) but she's not capable of independence at the moment.

There's another professional meeting tomorrow which I hope comes up with something / anything to help her.

1/2

It's been a zero sum day #today

Daughter remains in the care of a hospital due to her worsening #mentalhealth issues. This hospital is in another part of the country and aren't great at communicating.

I'm quite unwell. Stress & tension coupled with #exhaustion from yesterday have led to visual #migraine and some #ibs symptoms.
Every time I dozed off I was interrupted by staff or family.

We're hoping she'll be transferred back to her local hospital tomorrow.

#EUPD #BPD #NHS

#BPD is so wild.

I'm going to write a little thread about some recent concepts.

1. This label is unethical.

When we get introduced to this label we become desperate to "heal".

"I don't want to be that person anymore".

Instantly we are set up to fail.

Not wanting to be who you are is the foundation of wanting to unalive yourself. That person is validly responding to a world both overwhelming & consuming them.

A juicy human bug for the spider of patriarchal capitalism.

2. There are two halves to me.

Joe Tracini (I know him from Twitter) makes wonderful BPD vids that show this expertly.

The BPD half cuts me down & then has me project this negative self worth concept on to others.

Then believing/understanding they have developed these feelings about me independently.

3. This is the foundation of my isolation.

This negative self talk (think: inner monologue that won't stop talking no matter what I do) is projected on everybody without me realising. And as clever as I am, I believe it.

After all I don't read people's responses correctly.

4. Being open vs. being vulnerable.

The core of BPD is shame, an inability to feel it, recognise it, process it. It dysregulates me at light speed.

Processing shame requires vulnerability. Being vulnerable means being ok with people not liking me.

5. The grey area always wins. The grey area is where it's easiest to hold multiple truths simultaneously.

I think kindness lives in the grey area.

🩷

#borderlinepersonality #borderlinepersonalitydisorder #EUPD #autism #MentalHealth

I originally started #Sertraline for #anxiety but then daughter's #EUPD got much worse and the GP advised increasing the dose to deal with my new symptoms of #depression.

I now want to come off the stuff as it makes me feel unwell and the depression is pretty much under control, but I think it's worked for anxiety.

Having a sensible (that's face to face) discussion with a GP is almost impossible at our surgery - they love their telephone consultations.

Sigh.

#mentalhealth #BPD

@le_friwi_56
Thanks - she's OK this morning. I was very concerned yesterday evening as this sort of thing for people with #BPD / #EUPD is extremely unsettling - something her GP doesn't seem to realise.

She's talking about cooking for us on Sunday and trying to get tickets to see a talk.

Thanks again for your concern!

I think I'm relatively intelligent and tuned into the #nhs but even I am struggling to comprehend how my daughter’s #mentalhealth care is meant to work.

It's disjointed, uncoordinated, punitive and, frankly, unsafe.
It's like dealing with a shape shifting blob - you can't get hold of anything (let alone complain to anyone).

How someone in crisis is meant to wade through it all I do not know.

#BPD #EUPD

Daughter is in hospital in East Anglia.

She's been out of contact with all of her family / carers over the last few days - which has been extremely worrying. At least we know she's safe now.

She was taken to hospital by the police, although the circumstances aren't clear.

She has been severely let down by the community services in her home town.

We're in #Vienna - thankfully she has a supportive brother #sisterinlaw

#BPD #EUPD #mentalhealth