#datingadvice — Public Fediverse posts
Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #datingadvice, aggregated by home.social.
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The worst part about mixed signals isn't the confusion.
It's the hope. The constant wondering if maybe, this time, things are different.
You tell yourself to stop overthinking. But how do you stop caring?
Anyone else stuck in this loop right now?
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The worst part about mixed signals isn't the confusion.
It's the hope. The constant wondering if maybe, this time, things are different.
You tell yourself to stop overthinking. But how do you stop caring?
Anyone else stuck in this loop right now?
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Dating is a data game, not a guessing game. 📊
If you’re relying on memory or "vibes," you’re missing the point. 𝗧𝗿𝗮𝗰𝗸 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗮𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗹𝗼𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘀 so you can see exactly where your conversations are stalling. 𝗙𝗶𝘅 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗯𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗹𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗰𝗸, 𝗳𝗶𝘅 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘂𝗹𝘁𝘀.#SocialSkills #DataDriven #SelfImprovement #DatingAdvice #GrowthMindset #CommunicationSkills #ConfidenceBoost #RelationshipGoals #PersonalDevelopment #AttractWomen
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The worst part about mixed signals isn't the confusion.
It's the hope. The constant wondering if maybe, this time, things are different.
You tell yourself to stop overthinking. But how do you stop caring?
Anyone else stuck in this loop right now?
-
The worst part about mixed signals isn't the confusion.
It's the hope. The constant wondering if maybe, this time, things are different.
You tell yourself to stop overthinking. But how do you stop caring?
Anyone else stuck in this loop right now?
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Relationship Expectations: Texting Social Media-Affection and Spending
https://wp.me/p84YjG-aTK
#relationships #dating #communication #texting #socialmedia #publicaffection #giftgiving #moderndating #datingadvice #relationshipadvice #menandrelationships #selfawareness #zsoltzsembahttps://zsoltzsemba.com/the-relationship-expectations-nobody-talks-about-until-its-too-late/
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Relationship Expectations: Texting Social Media-Affection and Spending
https://wp.me/p84YjG-aTK
#relationships #dating #communication #texting #socialmedia #publicaffection #giftgiving #moderndating #datingadvice #relationshipadvice #menandrelationships #selfawareness #zsoltzsembahttps://zsoltzsemba.com/the-relationship-expectations-nobody-talks-about-until-its-too-late/
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Relationship Expectations: Texting Social Media-Affection and Spending
https://wp.me/p84YjG-aTK
#relationships #dating #communication #texting #socialmedia #publicaffection #giftgiving #moderndating #datingadvice #relationshipadvice #menandrelationships #selfawareness #zsoltzsembahttps://zsoltzsemba.com/the-relationship-expectations-nobody-talks-about-until-its-too-late/
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Relationship Expectations: Texting Social Media-Affection and Spending
https://wp.me/p84YjG-aTK
#relationships #dating #communication #texting #socialmedia #publicaffection #giftgiving #moderndating #datingadvice #relationshipadvice #menandrelationships #selfawareness #zsoltzsembahttps://zsoltzsemba.com/the-relationship-expectations-nobody-talks-about-until-its-too-late/
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Relationship Expectations: Texting Social Media-Affection and Spending
https://wp.me/p84YjG-aTK
#relationships #dating #communication #texting #socialmedia #publicaffection #giftgiving #moderndating #datingadvice #relationshipadvice #menandrelationships #selfawareness #zsoltzsembahttps://zsoltzsemba.com/the-relationship-expectations-nobody-talks-about-until-its-too-late/
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Spending, Gifts and Materialism
https://wp.me/p84YjG-aT0
#relationships #zsoltzsemba #relationshipexpectations #money #gifts #dating #datingadvice #moderndating #materialism #generosity #relationshipadvice #menandrelationships #lovеlanguages #materialistichttps://zsoltzsemba.com/what-spending-on-a-partner-actually-tells-you-about-the-relationship/
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From holding hands to avoiding each other in public.
https://wp.me/p84YjG-aSZ
#relationships #dating #relationshipexpectations #publicaffection #PDA #dating #datingadvice #moderndating #introvertextrovert #relationshipadvice #couplegoals #selfawareness #zsoltzsemba #menandrelationshipshttps://zsoltzsemba.com/how-you-act-in-public-says-a-lot-about-how-you-feel-in-private/
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The worst part about mixed signals isn't the confusion.
It's the hope. The constant wondering if maybe, this time, things are different.
You tell yourself to stop overthinking. But how do you stop caring?
Anyone else stuck in this loop right now?
-
The worst part about mixed signals isn't the confusion.
It's the hope. The constant wondering if maybe, this time, things are different.
You tell yourself to stop overthinking. But how do you stop caring?
Anyone else stuck in this loop right now?
-
The worst part about mixed signals isn't the confusion.
It's the hope. The constant wondering if maybe, this time, things are different.
You tell yourself to stop overthinking. But how do you stop caring?
Anyone else stuck in this loop right now?
-
The worst part about mixed signals isn't the confusion.
It's the hope. The constant wondering if maybe, this time, things are different.
You tell yourself to stop overthinking. But how do you stop caring?
Anyone else stuck in this loop right now?
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Your Social Media Behavior Is Saying Things You Haven't Said Out Loud
https://wp.me/p84YjG-aSY
#relationships #socialmedia #relationshipexpectations #jealousy #dating #datingadvice #boundaries #moderndating #relationshipadvice #trust #dms #menandrelationships
#zsoltzsembahttps://zsoltzsemba.com/your-social-media-behavior-is-saying-things-you-havent-said-out-loud/
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Your Social Media Behavior Is Saying Things You Haven't Said Out Loud
https://wp.me/p84YjG-aSY
#relationships #socialmedia #relationshipexpectations #jealousy #dating #datingadvice #boundaries #moderndating #relationshipadvice #trust #dms #menandrelationships
#zsoltzsembahttps://zsoltzsemba.com/your-social-media-behavior-is-saying-things-you-havent-said-out-loud/
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Your Social Media Behavior Is Saying Things You Haven't Said Out Loud
https://wp.me/p84YjG-aSY
#relationships #socialmedia #relationshipexpectations #jealousy #dating #datingadvice #boundaries #moderndating #relationshipadvice #trust #dms #menandrelationships
#zsoltzsembahttps://zsoltzsemba.com/your-social-media-behavior-is-saying-things-you-havent-said-out-loud/
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Your Social Media Behavior Is Saying Things You Haven't Said Out Loud
https://wp.me/p84YjG-aSY
#relationships #socialmedia #relationshipexpectations #jealousy #dating #datingadvice #boundaries #moderndating #relationshipadvice #trust #dms #menandrelationships
#zsoltzsembahttps://zsoltzsemba.com/your-social-media-behavior-is-saying-things-you-havent-said-out-loud/
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Your Social Media Behavior Is Saying Things You Haven't Said Out Loud
https://wp.me/p84YjG-aSY
#relationships #socialmedia #relationshipexpectations #jealousy #dating #datingadvice #boundaries #moderndating #relationshipadvice #trust #dms #menandrelationships
#zsoltzsembahttps://zsoltzsemba.com/your-social-media-behavior-is-saying-things-you-havent-said-out-loud/
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What Your Texting Habits Say About You
https://wp.me/p84YjG-aSX
#relationships #communication #textinghabits #datingadvice #relationshipexpectations #menandrelationships #moderndating #relationshipadvice #selfawareness #dating #zsoltzsembahttps://zsoltzsemba.com/what-your-texting-habits-say-about-you/
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CW: thoughts on modern dating culture
The hardest part of modern dating isn't meeting people — it's the middle part. When you've met someone, but don't know where it's going.
The waiting. The guessing. Reading signals that might mean nothing.
We need better tools for this in-between space. Not more apps — more clarity.
What do you think?
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CW: thoughts on modern dating culture
The hardest part of modern dating isn't meeting people — it's the middle part. When you've met someone, but don't know where it's going.
The waiting. The guessing. Reading signals that might mean nothing.
We need better tools for this in-between space. Not more apps — more clarity.
What do you think?
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CW: thoughts on modern dating culture
The hardest part of modern dating isn't meeting people.
It's the in-between — when you've met someone, but don't know where it's going.
The waiting. The guessing. Reading signals that might not mean anything.
We need better tools for this space. Not more dating apps. More ways to understand what's actually happening in the connections we already have.
What do you think? Real gap, or overthinking?
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CW: thoughts on modern dating culture
The hardest part of modern dating isn't meeting people.
It's the in-between — when you've met someone, but don't know where it's going.
The waiting. The guessing. Reading signals that might not mean anything.
We need better tools for this space. Not more dating apps. More ways to understand what's actually happening in the connections we already have.
What do you think? Real gap, or overthinking?
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Waiting for a text…replaying conversations…wondering if maybe they’re just busy.
Professor Whiskers has one reminder:If someone wants to talk to you… they usually find a way.
Protect your peace. Stop chasing.
#ProfessorWhiskers #CatWisdom #RelationshipAdvice #HealingJourney #KnowYourWorth #EmotionalHealing #SelfWorth #DatingAdvice #Overthinking #ChooseYourself #MindsetShift #FYP #TikTokCats #WomenEmpowerment #AttachmentStyles #HealthyRelationships #LifeAdvice #InnerPeace #Confidence #Shorts
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78% of dating app users report burnout.
It's not you. It's the whole experience.
The endless scrolling. The ghosting. The conversations that never go anywhere.
You don't need another app. You need clarity on the connection you're actually in.
What's your honest relationship with dating apps right now?
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78% of dating app users report burnout.
It's not you. It's the whole experience.
The endless scrolling. The ghosting. The conversations that never go anywhere.
You don't need another app. You need clarity on the connection you're actually in.
What's your honest relationship with dating apps right now?
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78% of dating app users report burnout.
It's not you. It's the whole experience.
The endless scrolling. The ghosting. The conversations that never go anywhere.
You don't need another app. You need clarity on the connection you're actually in.
What's your honest relationship with dating apps right now?
-
78% of dating app users report burnout.
It's not you. It's the whole experience.
The endless scrolling. The ghosting. The conversations that never go anywhere.
You don't need another app. You need clarity on the connection you're actually in.
What's your honest relationship with dating apps right now?
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78% of dating app users report burnout.
It's not you. It's the whole experience.
The endless scrolling. The ghosting. The conversations that never go anywhere.
You don't need another app. You need clarity on the connection you're actually in.
What's your honest relationship with dating apps right now?
-
78% of dating app users report burnout.
It's not you. It's the whole experience.
The endless scrolling. The ghosting. The conversations that never go anywhere.
You don't need another app. You need clarity on the connection you're actually in.
What's your honest relationship with dating apps right now?
-
78% of dating app users report burnout.
It's not you. It's the whole experience.
The endless scrolling. The ghosting. The conversations that never go anywhere.
You don't need another app. You need clarity on the connection you're actually in.
What's your honest relationship with dating apps right now?
-
78% of dating app users report burnout.
It's not you. It's the whole experience.
The endless scrolling. The ghosting. The conversations that never go anywhere.
You don't need another app. You need clarity on the connection you're actually in.
What's your honest relationship with dating apps right now?
-
78% of dating app users report burnout.
It's not you. It's the whole experience.
The endless scrolling. The ghosting. The conversations that never go anywhere.
You don't need another app. You need clarity on the connection you're actually in.
What's your honest relationship with dating apps right now?
-
78% of dating app users report burnout.
It's not you. It's the whole experience.
The endless scrolling. The ghosting. The conversations that never go anywhere.
You don't need another app. You need clarity on the connection you're actually in.
What's your honest relationship with dating apps right now?
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A hundred thousand generations of your ancestors crossed valleys, caves, skull shapes, species lines, and every conceivable “red flag” to put you here.
And now you’re ruling people out over emoji choice.
A rant for the red flag people: https://blueribbonteam.com/blog/2026/05/07/a-rant-for-the-red-flag-people/
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68% of people have been ghosted. The sudden silence after connection is one of the most painful modern dating experiences.
It's not just the unanswered messages. It's the shift from warmth to nothing — and the questions that follow.
Why do we disappear instead of being honest? And how do we protect our peace when it happens?
What helped you heal from ghosting?
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Touch is more powerful than you think.
Article link: https://afterdarktreasures.com/blogs/relationship-advice/transform-your-relationships-with-touch-here-s-how
#relationshipadvice #relationshipgoals #relationships #relationship #relationshipquotes #love #datingadvice #relationshipcoach #marriage #relationshiptips #relationshipproblems #dating #couplegoals #lovequotes #marriageadvice #couples #relationshipmatters #datingtips #healthyrelationships #selflove #relationshipexpert #relationshipmemes #relationshiphelp #marriagegoals #relationshipissues #Lgbtq #marriagecoach
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Touch is more powerful than you think.
Article link: https://afterdarktreasures.com/blogs/relationship-advice/transform-your-relationships-with-touch-here-s-how
#relationshipadvice #relationshipgoals #relationships #relationship #relationshipquotes #love #datingadvice #relationshipcoach #marriage #relationshiptips #relationshipproblems #dating #couplegoals #lovequotes #marriageadvice #couples #relationshipmatters #datingtips #healthyrelationships #selflove #relationshipexpert #relationshipmemes #relationshiphelp #marriagegoals #relationshipissues #Lgbtq #marriagecoach
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Touch is more powerful than you think.
Article link: https://afterdarktreasures.com/blogs/relationship-advice/transform-your-relationships-with-touch-here-s-how
#relationshipadvice #relationshipgoals #relationships #relationship #relationshipquotes #love #datingadvice #relationshipcoach #marriage #relationshiptips #relationshipproblems #dating #couplegoals #lovequotes #marriageadvice #couples #relationshipmatters #datingtips #healthyrelationships #selflove #relationshipexpert #relationshipmemes #relationshiphelp #marriagegoals #relationshipissues #Lgbtq #marriagecoach
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Agony Aunt: “Are keyboard touch typing skills ATTRACTIVE!?” ⌨️
Some human males delude themselves into believing certain actions are attractive. Today’s human male has decided his brilliance on a keyboard should be enough to impress even the most attractive dame.
Amy Adams? Sandra Hüller? Sandra Bullock? Other women called Sandra? All should be dropping before his most attractive typing might. Is this so? Let us explore the typing topic.
Touch Typing is the Secret to Great Romance?
Agony aunt,
I am in agony. I’ve just spend the last 72 hours touch typing my way to the annual Touch Typing Championship 2026. It was the most competitive year I’ve ever taken part in, but I fended off a young upstarter whom tried to STEAL my crown by thrashing him with a touch typing speed of 230 WPM (words per minute) compared to his PATHETIC 215 WPM. What a pathetic boy, he should leave competitions like this to MEN like me.
However, once the event ended and I was crowned the deserving champion I turned and looked around me, rightfully expecting very hot women to begin hurling themselves at me for a date and/or marriage.
But… nothing.
There was one chick there who glanced at me and I glared at her expectantly, but she just wandered off and got a hotdog from a hotdog stand. Try to comprehend that. SHE WANTED TO EAT A HOTDOG INSTEAD OF DATING A TOUCH TYPING CHAMPION. What is the world coming to? That is feminism. This is the wokeness and it’s ruining society.
I can’t possible be wrong. What could possibly be unattractive about someone being able to have this God-given skill that others can only dream of? It shows:
- Tenacity
- Intellectual genius
- Versatility
- Emotional intelligence
- Wit
- Charm
- An enjoyment of keyboards
- Dedication
How can women look me in the eye (me, admittedly not the best looking guy ever, but a touch typing genius) and think this isn’t worthy of their time?
On my Tinder dating profile I lead with it: DEREK, 33, TOUCH TYPING GENIUS
I then list out my many championship victories and link to an article that was written about me, in which I make confident (not arrogant, confident) claims about how superior I am to everyone else. And yet in the last three months I’ve swiped on over 10,000 women and only three have swiped back. One ended up being a guy pretending to be a woman, the other two were scammers thinking I’ve made a tonne of money from my victories. I haven’t. I’ve actually lost money because it’s £100 to enter the competitions. That and the keyboard investments and I’m down about £500 over the last decade due to all of this.
AND NO HOT WOMEN.
Please. Advice needed. Is it my keyboard?! It’s all black, do I need a more feminine one or something to show off my sensitive side?
Yours,
Derek
Hi there, Derek! To help you out, we went out onto the streets of Manchester city centre and randomly began demanding answers from women we encountered: “WHY WON’T YOU DATE, DEREK!?” We roared, “HE’S A TOUCH TYPING WORLD CHAMPION!”
It turns out (from the ones who didn’t run away, at least) they’re more interested in personality traits such as kindness, humour, compassion, intelligence, and an interest in the arts.
None of them were impressed or interested in the typing thing. One of them said it was “weird”*. Sorry about that! Maybe take up a new hobby.
*We have subsequently learned Derek had a stroke after reading that someone found the touch typing thing “weird”. Although he’s since recovered from that, he’s quit his day job and entered a deep, dark depression of marathon touch typing sessions. Derek… for GOD’S SAKE, man. This is not the answer. Take up golf, or something.
#AgonyAunt #dating #datingAdvice #Feminism #Humor #keyboards #masculinity #Satire #satirical #Silly #touchTyping #toxicMasculinity #typing -
Agony Aunt: “Are keyboard touch typing skills ATTRACTIVE!?” ⌨️
Some human males delude themselves into believing certain actions are attractive. Today’s human male has decided his brilliance on a keyboard should be enough to impress even the most attractive dame.
Amy Adams? Sandra Hüller? Sandra Bullock? Other women called Sandra? All should be dropping before his most attractive typing might. Is this so? Let us explore the typing topic.
Touch Typing is the Secret to Great Romance?
Agony aunt,
I am in agony. I’ve just spend the last 72 hours touch typing my way to the annual Touch Typing Championship 2026. It was the most competitive year I’ve ever taken part in, but I fended off a young upstarter whom tried to STEAL my crown by thrashing him with a touch typing speed of 230 WPM (words per minute) compared to his PATHETIC 215 WPM. What a pathetic boy, he should leave competitions like this to MEN like me.
However, once the event ended and I was crowned the deserving champion I turned and looked around me, rightfully expecting very hot women to begin hurling themselves at me for a date and/or marriage.
But… nothing.
There was one chick there who glanced at me and I glared at her expectantly, but she just wandered off and got a hotdog from a hotdog stand. Try to comprehend that. SHE WANTED TO EAT A HOTDOG INSTEAD OF DATING A TOUCH TYPING CHAMPION. What is the world coming to? That is feminism. This is the wokeness and it’s ruining society.
I can’t possible be wrong. What could possibly be unattractive about someone being able to have this God-given skill that others can only dream of? It shows:
- Tenacity
- Intellectual genius
- Versatility
- Emotional intelligence
- Wit
- Charm
- An enjoyment of keyboards
- Dedication
How can women look me in the eye (me, admittedly not the best looking guy ever, but a touch typing genius) and think this isn’t worthy of their time?
On my Tinder dating profile I lead with it: DEREK, 33, TOUCH TYPING GENIUS
I then list out my many championship victories and link to an article that was written about me, in which I make confident (not arrogant, confident) claims about how superior I am to everyone else. And yet in the last three months I’ve swiped on over 10,000 women and only three have swiped back. One ended up being a guy pretending to be a woman, the other two were scammers thinking I’ve made a tonne of money from my victories. I haven’t. I’ve actually lost money because it’s £100 to enter the competitions. That and the keyboard investments and I’m down about £500 over the last decade due to all of this.
AND NO HOT WOMEN.
Please. Advice needed. Is it my keyboard?! It’s all black, do I need a more feminine one or something to show off my sensitive side?
Yours,
Derek
Hi there, Derek! To help you out, we went out onto the streets of Manchester city centre and randomly began demanding answers from women we encountered: “WHY WON’T YOU DATE, DEREK!?” We roared, “HE’S A TOUCH TYPING WORLD CHAMPION!”
It turns out (from the ones who didn’t run away, at least) they’re more interested in personality traits such as kindness, humour, compassion, intelligence, and an interest in the arts.
None of them were impressed or interested in the typing thing. One of them said it was “weird”*. Sorry about that! Maybe take up a new hobby.
*We have subsequently learned Derek had a stroke after reading that someone found the touch typing thing “weird”. Although he’s since recovered from that, he’s quit his day job and entered a deep, dark depression of marathon touch typing sessions. Derek… for GOD’S SAKE, man. This is not the answer. Take up golf, or something.
#AgonyAunt #dating #datingAdvice #Feminism #Humor #keyboards #masculinity #Satire #satirical #Silly #touchTyping #toxicMasculinity #typing -
Agony Aunt: “Are keyboard touch typing skills ATTRACTIVE!?” ⌨️
Some human males delude themselves into believing certain actions are attractive. Today’s human male has decided his brilliance on a keyboard should be enough to impress even the most attractive dame.
Amy Adams? Sandra Hüller? Sandra Bullock? Other women called Sandra? All should be dropping before his most attractive typing might. Is this so? Let us explore the typing topic.
Touch Typing is the Secret to Great Romance?
Agony aunt,
I am in agony. I’ve just spend the last 72 hours touch typing my way to the annual Touch Typing Championship 2026. It was the most competitive year I’ve ever taken part in, but I fended off a young upstarter whom tried to STEAL my crown by thrashing him with a touch typing speed of 230 WPM (words per minute) compared to his PATHETIC 215 WPM. What a pathetic boy, he should leave competitions like this to MEN like me.
However, once the event ended and I was crowned the deserving champion I turned and looked around me, rightfully expecting very hot women to begin hurling themselves at me for a date and/or marriage.
But… nothing.
There was one chick there who glanced at me and I glared at her expectantly, but she just wandered off and got a hotdog from a hotdog stand. Try to comprehend that. SHE WANTED TO EAT A HOTDOG INSTEAD OF DATING A TOUCH TYPING CHAMPION. What is the world coming to? That is feminism. This is the wokeness and it’s ruining society.
I can’t possible be wrong. What could possibly be unattractive about someone being able to have this God-given skill that others can only dream of? It shows:
- Tenacity
- Intellectual genius
- Versatility
- Emotional intelligence
- Wit
- Charm
- An enjoyment of keyboards
- Dedication
How can women look me in the eye (me, admittedly not the best looking guy ever, but a touch typing genius) and think this isn’t worthy of their time?
On my Tinder dating profile I lead with it: DEREK, 33, TOUCH TYPING GENIUS
I then list out my many championship victories and link to an article that was written about me, in which I make confident (not arrogant, confident) claims about how superior I am to everyone else. And yet in the last three months I’ve swiped on over 10,000 women and only three have swiped back. One ended up being a guy pretending to be a woman, the other two were scammers thinking I’ve made a tonne of money from my victories. I haven’t. I’ve actually lost money because it’s £100 to enter the competitions. That and the keyboard investments and I’m down about £500 over the last decade due to all of this.
AND NO HOT WOMEN.
Please. Advice needed. Is it my keyboard?! It’s all black, do I need a more feminine one or something to show off my sensitive side?
Yours,
Derek
Hi there, Derek! To help you out, we went out onto the streets of Manchester city centre and randomly began demanding answers from women we encountered: “WHY WON’T YOU DATE, DEREK!?” We roared, “HE’S A TOUCH TYPING WORLD CHAMPION!”
It turns out (from the ones who didn’t run away, at least) they’re more interested in personality traits such as kindness, humour, compassion, intelligence, and an interest in the arts.
None of them were impressed or interested in the typing thing. One of them said it was “weird”*. Sorry about that! Maybe take up a new hobby.
*We have subsequently learned Derek had a stroke after reading that someone found the touch typing thing “weird”. Although he’s since recovered from that, he’s quit his day job and entered a deep, dark depression of marathon touch typing sessions. Derek… for GOD’S SAKE, man. This is not the answer. Take up golf, or something.
#AgonyAunt #dating #datingAdvice #Feminism #Humor #keyboards #masculinity #Satire #satirical #Silly #touchTyping #toxicMasculinity #typing -
Agony Aunt: “Are keyboard touch typing skills ATTRACTIVE!?” ⌨️
Some human males delude themselves into believing certain actions are attractive. Today’s human male has decided his brilliance on a keyboard should be enough to impress even the most attractive dame.
Amy Adams? Sandra Hüller? Sandra Bullock? Other women called Sandra? All should be dropping before his most attractive typing might. Is this so? Let us explore the typing topic.
Touch Typing is the Secret to Great Romance?
Agony aunt,
I am in agony. I’ve just spend the last 72 hours touch typing my way to the annual Touch Typing Championship 2026. It was the most competitive year I’ve ever taken part in, but I fended off a young upstarter whom tried to STEAL my crown by thrashing him with a touch typing speed of 230 WPM (words per minute) compared to his PATHETIC 215 WPM. What a pathetic boy, he should leave competitions like this to MEN like me.
However, once the event ended and I was crowned the deserving champion I turned and looked around me, rightfully expecting very hot women to begin hurling themselves at me for a date and/or marriage.
But… nothing.
There was one chick there who glanced at me and I glared at her expectantly, but she just wandered off and got a hotdog from a hotdog stand. Try to comprehend that. SHE WANTED TO EAT A HOTDOG INSTEAD OF DATING A TOUCH TYPING CHAMPION. What is the world coming to? That is feminism. This is the wokeness and it’s ruining society.
I can’t possible be wrong. What could possibly be unattractive about someone being able to have this God-given skill that others can only dream of? It shows:
- Tenacity
- Intellectual genius
- Versatility
- Emotional intelligence
- Wit
- Charm
- An enjoyment of keyboards
- Dedication
How can women look me in the eye (me, admittedly not the best looking guy ever, but a touch typing genius) and think this isn’t worthy of their time?
On my Tinder dating profile I lead with it: DEREK, 33, TOUCH TYPING GENIUS
I then list out my many championship victories and link to an article that was written about me, in which I make confident (not arrogant, confident) claims about how superior I am to everyone else. And yet in the last three months I’ve swiped on over 10,000 women and only three have swiped back. One ended up being a guy pretending to be a woman, the other two were scammers thinking I’ve made a tonne of money from my victories. I haven’t. I’ve actually lost money because it’s £100 to enter the competitions. That and the keyboard investments and I’m down about £500 over the last decade due to all of this.
AND NO HOT WOMEN.
Please. Advice needed. Is it my keyboard?! It’s all black, do I need a more feminine one or something to show off my sensitive side?
Yours,
Derek
Hi there, Derek! To help you out, we went out onto the streets of Manchester city centre and randomly began demanding answers from women we encountered: “WHY WON’T YOU DATE, DEREK!?” We roared, “HE’S A TOUCH TYPING WORLD CHAMPION!”
It turns out (from the ones who didn’t run away, at least) they’re more interested in personality traits such as kindness, humour, compassion, intelligence, and an interest in the arts.
None of them were impressed or interested in the typing thing. One of them said it was “weird”*. Sorry about that! Maybe take up a new hobby.
*We have subsequently learned Derek had a stroke after reading that someone found the touch typing thing “weird”. Although he’s since recovered from that, he’s quit his day job and entered a deep, dark depression of marathon touch typing sessions. Derek… for GOD’S SAKE, man. This is not the answer. Take up golf, or something.
#AgonyAunt #dating #datingAdvice #Feminism #Humor #keyboards #masculinity #Satire #satirical #Silly #touchTyping #toxicMasculinity #typing -
https://www.europesays.com/ie/465249/ I’m over dating apps. I went to a singles party to find a real connection #DatingAdvice #Éire #family #IE #Ireland #lifestyle #Love&Friendship #Mobile #Relationships #standard #Technology #TopStory #USContent
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The red flags were there…
you just called them potential.
You saw the signs…
but you hoped they’d change.
Next time… pay attention early.
Don’t rename red flags.
#Shorts #RedFlags #DatingAdvice #SelfRespect #Awareness #CatWisdom #MindsetShift #ProfessorWhiskers -
I’m over dating apps. I went to a singles party to find a real connection
There were definitely some pluses to this kind of event – at least you don’t waste a whole…
#NewsBeep #News #Mobile #DatingAdvice #Family #Lifestyle #Love&Friendship #relationships #standard #Technology #TopStory #UK #UnitedKingdom #UScontent
https://www.newsbeep.com/uk/562304/