#crochethooks — Public Fediverse posts
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10 Crochet Red Flags That Instantly Tell Me What Kind of Crocheter You Are
Crocheters are some of the nicest people you’ll ever meet. We create beautiful things, support each other, and somehow convince ourselves that buying more yarn is a perfectly reasonable response to having too much yarn.
But spend enough time in crochet groups and patterns start to emerge.
Certain habits instantly reveal what kind of crocheter you’re dealing with.
In the spirit of fun—and because every single one of us is guilty of at least one of these—here are ten crochet red flags that instantly tell me what kind of crocheter you are.
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🚩 1. “I Don’t Need More Yarn.”
You say this while standing in front of a yarn stash large enough to survive an apocalypse.
You aren’t fooling anyone.
Not your spouse.
Not your crochet group.
And definitely not the yarn store cashier who recognizes you by name.
Crocheter Type: The Yarn Dragon
Special ability: Acquiring yarn faster than projects can consume it.
🚩 2. “I’ll Weave in the Ends Later.”
No.
No, you won’t.
That blanket is finished.
The photos have been taken.
The project has been gifted.
The ends are still hanging there, mocking you.
Crocheter Type: The Professional Procrastinator
Special ability: Creating future problems with remarkable efficiency.
🚩 3. You Own 47 Crochet Hooks But Use the Same One Every Time.
You have ergonomic hooks.
Fancy hooks.
Light-up hooks.
Wood hooks.
Hooks you forgot you owned.
Yet somehow every project gets made with the same trusty favorite.
Crocheter Type: The Hook Collector
Special ability: Shopping for hooks instead of using them.
🚩 4. You Refuse to Check Gauge.
Patterns provide gauge for a reason.
You look directly at it.
Ignore it completely.
Then spend three days wondering why your sweater would fit either a Chihuahua or a small horse.
Crocheter Type: The Chaos Goblin
Special ability: Turning every project into a surprise.
🚩 5. You Buy Yarn Before Choosing a Pattern.
The yarn spoke to you.
You had a vision.
The vision lasted approximately four seconds.
Now the yarn lives in a storage bin waiting for destiny.
Crocheter Type: The Yarn Optimist
Special ability: Believing every skein has a purpose.
🚩 6. Every “Quick Project” Takes Three Weeks.
You confidently announce:
“This should only take an evening.”
Three weeks later you’re still explaining why it’s almost finished.
Crocheter Type: The Time Traveler
Special ability: Existing in a completely different dimension than the calendar.
🚩 7. You Frog the Same Row Five Times.
The pattern is fine.
The yarn is fine.
The hook is fine.
The problem is that your brain has temporarily left the chat.
Crocheter Type: The Perfectionist
Special ability: Repeating the same mistake with increasing determination.
🚩 8. You Start New Projects Before Finishing Old Ones.
You have:
- One blanket in progress.
- Two amigurumi missing arms.
- A shawl waiting for a border.
- Three mystery projects in bags.
And yet you just cast your eye on a new pattern.
Crocheter Type: The Serial Starter
Special ability: Maximum excitement, minimum completion.
🚩 9. You Keep Every Tiny Scrap of Yarn.
You can’t throw it away.
What if you need it someday?
For what?
Nobody knows.
But it might be useful.
Crocheter Type: The Scrap Goblin
Special ability: Turning sandwich bags into a storage system.
🚩 10. You Say “Just One More Row” at Midnight.
The most dangerous lie in crochet.
One more row becomes five.
Five becomes ten.
Suddenly it’s 2:17 a.m. and you’re making life choices with a crochet hook in your hand.
Crocheter Type: The Night Owl Hooker
Special ability: Time blindness powered entirely by yarn.
The Real Question…
Which red flag are you?
Personally, I suspect most crocheters are a terrifying combination of:
🚩 Yarn Dragon
🚩 Scrap Goblin
🚩 Professional Procrastinator
🚩 Serial Starter
And honestly? That’s part of the fun.
After all, if we were perfectly organized, would we even be crocheters?
Tell Me Your Crochet Red Flag
What’s your biggest crochet red flag—the one you can’t even defend anymore?
Be honest.
This is a safe space.
Mostly. 😆
#Crochet #crochetAddiction #crochetBeginners #crochetBlogPost #crochetCommunity #crochetConfessions #crochetDiscussion #crochetEnthusiasts #crochetFun #crochetHobby #crochetHooks #crochetHumor #crochetHumorBlog #crochetInspiration #crochetJokes #crochetLife #crochetLifestyle #crochetMemes #crochetMistakes #CrochetPatterns #crochetProjects #crochetRedFlags #CrochetTips #crochetTrends #crocheterProblems #fiberArts #funnyCrochetBlog #handmadeCrafts #yarnAddiction #yarnLover #yarnStash -
Which Hooks Are Actually Worth Your Money?
Every crocheter starts with the same innocent thought:
“A crochet hook is a crochet hook.”
Three months later you’re researching ergonomic handles at 2 a.m., reading 47-page forum debates, and wondering if a Japanese hook will somehow improve your life.
The answer is…sometimes.
Today we’re diving into the most popular crochet hooks on the market, who they’re best for, and whether they’re worth adding to your collection.
Best Hook for Complete Beginners
Why beginners like them:
- Cheap
- Available almost everywhere
- Durable
- Great for learning basic stitches
The downside:
The tapered head can split yarn for some crocheters, especially when working with softer acrylics.
Crocheter Rating: ★★★☆☆
Wallet Rating: ★★★★★
Likelihood You’ll Still Be Using It In Five Years: 40%
The Hook Everyone Eventually Tries
If crochet hooks had a popularity contest, Clover Amour would probably win.
Why people love them:
- Comfortable ergonomic handle
- Smooth glide
- Distinct colors by size
- Excellent for long crochet sessions
Many crocheters describe their first Clover Amour purchase as a “gateway hook.”
One turns into three.
Three turns into the whole set.
Crocheter Rating: ★★★★★
Likelihood You’ll Accidentally Start a Collection: 98%
Best for Arthritic Hands
These are the luxury sports cars of crochet hooks.
Pros:
- Extremely comfortable grip
- Beautiful designs
- Reduces hand strain for many crocheters
Cons:
- Expensive
- Losing one feels like losing jewelry
Crocheter Rating: ★★★★☆
Panic Level When Dropped on a Hard Floor: ★★★★★
Best for Speed Crocheters
These hooks have developed a near-cult following.
Many experienced crocheters claim they can crochet faster with Tulips than with any other hook.
Why:
- Very smooth finish
- Excellent hook shape
- Consistent tension
If Clover Amour and Furls had a very efficient Japanese cousin, it would be Tulip Etimo.
Crocheter Rating: ★★★★★
Likelihood of Becoming Your Favorite Hook: High
Best Budget Ergonomic Hook
Many crocheters overlook these because they’re less flashy than some of the premium brands.
Pros:
- Affordable
- Comfortable
- Inline hook design
Perfect for:
Anyone who wants ergonomic comfort without spending premium-hook money.
Most Divisive Hook
Inline vs. Tapered Hooks
This debate has been going on since approximately the invention of yarn.
Inline Hooks
(Susan Bates style)
- More defined throat
- Better stitch consistency for some crocheters
- Popular with amigurumi makers
Tapered Hooks
(Boye style)
- Smoother stitch flow
- Easier for beginners
- Often preferred for garments and blankets
Ask ten crocheters which is better and you’ll get twelve opinions.
Hooks That Look Amazing But Aren’t For Everyone
Resin Hooks
Wooden Hooks
Handmade Turned Hooks
They’re gorgeous.
They’re photogenic.
They’re Instagram famous.
But depending on the finish, they may not glide as smoothly as metal hooks.
Sometimes pretty and practical aren’t the same thing.
The Hook Hall of Fame
If I were building a crochet starter collection today:
🥇 Best Beginner Hook: Boye
🥈 Best Overall Hook: Clover Amour
🥉 Best Premium Hook: Tulip Etimo
🏆 Best Luxury Hook: Furls Odyssey
💰 Best Budget Ergonomic Hook: Susan Bates Soft Ergonomic
Let’s settle this once and for all:
What’s the best crochet hook you’ve ever used—and which one do you absolutely refuse to buy again?
#amigurumiCrochet #beginnerCrochet #bestCrochetHooks #boyeCrochetHooks #cloverAmourHooks #crochetAccessories #crochetAdvice #crochetBlog #crochetCommunity #crochetDiscussion #crochetEnthusiasts #crochetEquipment #crochetEssentials #crochetForBeginners #crochetGuide #crochetHacks #crochetHobby #crochetHookReviews #crochetHooks #crochetInspiration #CrochetPatterns #crochetProjects #crochetRecommendations #crochetResources #crochetSupplies #crochetTechniques #CrochetTips #crochetToolkit #crochetTools #crocheterLife #ergonomicCrochetHooks #fiberArts #furlsCrochetHooks #handmadeCrafts #hookComparison #modernCrochet #susanBatesHooks #tulipEtimoHooks #yarnAndHooks #yarnCrafts -
Nobody Warns You How Expensive Crochet Actually Is
People outside the crochet world think this hobby is adorable.
“Oh, you just need yarn and a hook!”
Yes. Technically.
And technically, owning a cat just requires “a little food and a litter box.” We all know how that turns out.
Crochet has one of the biggest bait-and-switches of any hobby I’ve ever seen. You walk into it thinking you’re about to become a financially responsible handmade queen who saves money by making your own things.
Then three years later you’re explaining to your spouse why you needed twelve shades of sage green “because they’re completely different.”
Crochet may be cheaper than therapy, but only barely. 😄
Subscribe to HodgePodge Crochet for free patterns, tutorials, stash-busting ideas, and crochet conversations that every yarn lover can relate to.
It Starts Innocently
At first, crochet seems cheap.
You buy one hook.
One skein of yarn.
Maybe a little beginner pattern.You make a crooked scarf that somehow gets wider and narrower at the same time, and you feel unstoppable.
You think:
“This is great! I’ve found an affordable hobby!”That is exactly how crochet gets you.
Because crochet never stays at:
- one hook
- one skein
- one project
Never.
Suddenly You Have Opinions About Yarn
This is where the trouble begins.
At first, yarn is just yarn.
Then one day you touch a buttery soft merino wool blend and your brain rewires itself permanently.
Now acrylic feels “scratchy.”
Cotton has “structure.”
Alpaca is “dreamy.”
Mohair is “ethereal.”
Bamboo has “drape.”You become the kind of person who says things like:
“I just don’t think this fiber has enough bounce for the texture I’m envisioning.”Who ARE you anymore?
The Hook Situation Gets Out of Control Fast
Non-crocheters think we own one hook.
That’s adorable.
We own:
- ergonomic hooks
- inline hooks
- tapered hooks
- travel hooks
- backup hooks
- “I forgot where I put my favorite hook” hooks
- mystery hooks we found in couch cushions
And somehow the 5 mm hook you need is always missing despite owning seventeen of them.
Scientists should study this phenomenon.
Then There’s the “Small” Extras
Nobody warns you about the side purchases.
The stitch markers.
The row counters.
The blocking mats.
The tapestry needles.
The yarn bowls.
The project bags.
The storage bins.
The labels.
The scissors you refuse to let anyone in the house touch.At some point, your crochet supplies quietly become their own ecosystem.
Let’s Talk About Yarn Hoarding
Every crocheter reaches a point where buying yarn and using yarn become two entirely separate hobbies.
You don’t buy yarn because you need it.
You buy yarn because:
- it was on sale
- the color was pretty
- you “might use it someday”
- you absolutely did not have this exact shade already (you definitely did)
And somehow every yarn purchase feels completely justified in the moment.
Crochet Is Not Actually Cheaper Than Buying Clothes
This realization hurts.
You spend:
- $60 on yarn
- 40 hours making a cardigan
- emotional damage from frogging half of it twice
Then someone asks:
“Why not just buy one from the store?”Because THIS one contains suffering and personality, Karen.
But Here’s the Thing…
Even with all the expense, the chaos, and the mountain of yarn threatening to collapse onto us at any moment…
Most of us still wouldn’t trade crochet for anything.
Because crochet isn’t really about saving money.
It’s about:
- creating something with your own hands
- relaxing after a long day
- turning yarn into art
- feeling connected to generations of makers before us
- staring proudly at a finished project thinking:
“I MADE THAT.”
Even if it cost way more than expected.
And honestly?
That’s still worth it.
#craftingHumor #crafts #Crochet #crochetBlog #crochetCommunity #crochetFun #crochetHooks #crochetHumor #crochetInspiration #crochetLife #crochetLover #crochetMeme #crochetObsession #crochetProblems #crochetSupplies #crochetPattern #crocheterLife #fiberArts #handmadeBusiness #pattern #yarn #yarnAddiction #yarnHoarder #yarnStash -
Couverture au crochet, 700 grannies !
#crochet #uncinetto #crochethooks #GrannySquare -
Couverture au crochet, 700 grannies !
#crochet #uncinetto #crochethooks #GrannySquare -
Couverture au crochet, 700 grannies !
#crochet #uncinetto #crochethooks #GrannySquare -
Couverture au crochet, 700 grannies !
#crochet #uncinetto #crochethooks #GrannySquare -
Couverture au crochet, 700 grannies !
#crochet #uncinetto #crochethooks #GrannySquare -
Die Häkeltierchens sind abreisebereit. Sie reisen zu ihren neuen kleinen FreundInnen ins schöne 🇦🇹 , nur eine Knalllocken-Krake und der türkise Dino werden gemeinsam in einem Haushalt zusammen mit ihren neuen Freundwesen leben. Werden ziemlich sicher geliebt und fleißig geknuddelt. Machts gut kleine Häkelfreunde <3
#haekeln #crochet #crochethooks #handarbeiten #toy #DIY #Kuscheltier #yarn
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Ok, so here goes… I like to keep to myself but am forced to socialise at work, whilst travelling to and from work.
I have only just come back to #knitting and #crochet and #spinning.
I love to keep my eye on #politics hence #auspol and I love lazy days rugged up in bed with #wool and #homecrafted #crochethooks and a good book or my beloved #ukuleles.
Above all, love spending time with @Alpha1Nine.
-
Ok, so here goes… I like to keep to myself but am forced to socialise at work, whilst travelling to and from work.
I have only just come back to #knitting and #crochet and #spinning.
I love to keep my eye on #politics hence #auspol and I love lazy days rugged up in bed with #wool and #homecrafted #crochethooks and a good book or my beloved #ukuleles.
Above all, love spending time with @Alpha1Nine.
-
Ok, so here goes… I like to keep to myself but am forced to socialise at work, whilst travelling to and from work.
I have only just come back to #knitting and #crochet and #spinning.
I love to keep my eye on #politics hence #auspol and I love lazy days rugged up in bed with #wool and #homecrafted #crochethooks and a good book or my beloved #ukuleles.
Above all, love spending time with @Alpha1Nine.
-
Ok, so here goes… I like to keep to myself but am forced to socialise at work, whilst travelling to and from work.
I have only just come back to #knitting and #crochet and #spinning.
I love to keep my eye on #politics hence #auspol and I love lazy days rugged up in bed with #wool and #homecrafted #crochethooks and a good book or my beloved #ukuleles.
Above all, love spending time with @Alpha1Nine.
-
Ok, so here goes… I like to keep to myself but am forced to socialise at work, whilst travelling to and from work.
I have only just come back to #knitting and #crochet and #spinning.
I love to keep my eye on #politics hence #auspol and I love lazy days rugged up in bed with #wool and #homecrafted #crochethooks and a good book or my beloved #ukuleles.
Above all, love spending time with @Alpha1Nine.