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#cloud-computing — Public Fediverse posts

Live and recent posts from across the Fediverse tagged #cloud-computing, aggregated by home.social.

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  1. Google's Pixel Journal app update introduces cloud-based AI processing, enhancing features like Auto Format and Inspiration. Users can now choose between 'Simple' and 'Expressive' modes, customize media layouts, and set journaling reminders. Visual tweaks improve the dark theme and calendar views. This update reflects Google's commitment to integrating AI while maintaining user privacy.

    #PixelJournal #AI #CloudComputing #UserExperience #Privacy #Google

    thedailytechfeed.com/pixel-jou

  2. AWS Interactive Airframe provides a fully managed aerodynamic control surface for your event-driven workloads, automatically adjusting lift and drag across up to six independently configured flight envelopes depending on which combination of SDKs, CLI versions, and regional endpoints you happened to use during setup. The airframe itself is highly durable and rated for sustained turbulence, though control authority is delegated through a nested IAM trust policy that you will need to update manually any time you change accounts, regions, or your opinion about resource-based policies. The Free Tier includes 750 hours of single-axis stabilization per month for the first 12 months, after which pitch and roll are billed separately at $0.023 per adjustment, yaw is priced on request, and thrust vectoring is available exclusively in us-east-1.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  3. 🚀 Stop using #CPU #limits in #Kubernetes, they said! 🙄 As if we enjoy watching our apps crawl at a snail's pace while burning cash like it's Monopoly money. 😂 Maybe next they'll tell us to use carrier pigeons for data transfer. 🐦
    github.com/inevolin/k8s-cpu-li #Kubernetes #Performance #TechHumor #CloudComputing #HackerNews #ngated

  4. 🚀 Stop using #CPU #limits in #Kubernetes, they said! 🙄 As if we enjoy watching our apps crawl at a snail's pace while burning cash like it's Monopoly money. 😂 Maybe next they'll tell us to use carrier pigeons for data transfer. 🐦
    github.com/inevolin/k8s-cpu-li #Kubernetes #Performance #TechHumor #CloudComputing #HackerNews #ngated

  5. Amazon Turbo Doorknob is a fully managed rotational access service that lets you open, close, and re-open the same entry point up to 14 times before realizing you needed a different door entirely. The knob itself turns up to 270 degrees, which is enough to get you in but not quite enough to get you back out, and latency is measured from the moment your hand makes contact to the moment you accept that the door was push, not pull. Free Tier includes 10,000 turns per month for the first 12 months, after which you are billed per degree of rotation, per availability zone, and separately for the click.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  6. Amazon Turbo Doorknob is a fully managed rotational access service that lets you open, close, and re-open the same entry point up to 14 times before realizing you needed a different door entirely. The knob itself turns up to 270 degrees, which is enough to get you in but not quite enough to get you back out, and latency is measured from the moment your hand makes contact to the moment you accept that the door was push, not pull. Free Tier includes 10,000 turns per month for the first 12 months, after which you are billed per degree of rotation, per availability zone, and separately for the click.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  7. AWS Managed Aqua Pineapple provides fully managed, spiky-exterior decomposition of your most fibrous distributed workloads, enzymatically breaking down legacy monoliths into microservices with the same precision that bromelain dissolves protein — a process that, like the fruit itself, cannot be rushed, and will cost you $0.0000083 per enzymatic unit after the first 10,000 units, which resets monthly but is calculated hourly. The service is deeply integrated with IAM, requiring a minimum of fourteen distinct permission boundaries to authorize a single decomposition job, each of which must be attached to a role that assumes a role that trusts a service principal that was deprecated in 2023 but still works if you don't think about it too hard. Free Tier includes 500 enzymatic units per month for the first twelve months in us-east-1, after which your workloads will continue decomposing at standard rates whether you intended them to or not.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  8. AWS Organic Analytics Ziggurat ingests your telemetry data through a series of progressively narrowing tiers, each layer compressing your observability surface until only the most structurally load-bearing insights remain visible at the apex, with full support for 847 data source connectors, 12 of which are currently available in us-east-1. The Free Tier includes up to 1,000 analytical units per month, where an analytical unit is defined as a single field in a single record evaluated by a single rule during a single invocation, and the billing documentation for what constitutes an invocation is available as a 34-page PDF with an errata page. IAM permissions for Ziggurat are managed through a separate policy namespace, ziggurat-analytics-organic-core, which inherits nothing from your existing analytics policies but does interact with them in ways that will become clear after your first unexpected bill.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  9. AWS Organic Analytics Ziggurat ingests your telemetry data through a series of progressively narrowing tiers, each layer compressing your observability surface until only the most structurally load-bearing insights remain visible at the apex, with full support for 847 data source connectors, 12 of which are currently available in us-east-1. The Free Tier includes up to 1,000 analytical units per month, where an analytical unit is defined as a single field in a single record evaluated by a single rule during a single invocation, and the billing documentation for what constitutes an invocation is available as a 34-page PDF with an errata page. IAM permissions for Ziggurat are managed through a separate policy namespace, ziggurat-analytics-organic-core, which inherits nothing from your existing analytics policies but does interact with them in ways that will become clear after your first unexpected bill.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  10. RT @deepseek_ai: API-Preisaktualisierung 💰 Mit der Veröffentlichung der V4-Serie aktualisieren wir unsere API-Preise und führen Spitzen- und Nebenkostenraten ein. Die Nebenkostenraten liegen 50 % unter den Spitzenraten, was eine flexiblere Planung von Arbeitslasten ermöglicht. 📉 Die neuen Preise gelten ab 16:00 Uhr UTC am 16. August 2026 🕒

    mehr auf Arint.info

    #API #CloudComputing #Kostenoptimierung #Preisgestaltung #V4Release #WorkloadScheduling #arint_info

    https://x.com/deepseek_ai/status/2087864589895798968#m

  11. Amazon Integration Sundae is a fully managed orchestration layer that sits on top of your existing EventBridge, Step Functions, MQ, AppFlow, and API Gateway configurations and holds them together, with additional toppings available from the AWS Marketplace at per-topping rates that are assessed each time a topping is accessed, read, written, listed, or exists. The Free Tier includes one scoop per month, defined as up to 1,000 integration events in us-east-1, after which standard sundae pricing applies at a rate determined by the number of layers, the temperature of your data at rest, and whether you have selected a waffle cone environment, which requires a separate IAM policy that AWS will not provide. Like all AWS integration services, Amazon Integration Sundae is the recommended replacement for the previous recommended replacement, and the console experience is generally available in us-east-1 with other regions expected to follow at a pace consistent with our historical commitment to that phrase.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  12. Amazon Warp Blowgun for Apache Tentacles is a fully managed, highly targeted event delivery service that propels discrete payloads through precisely aimed integration pipelines at sub-millisecond velocity, with each Tentacle endpoint independently auto-scaling to wrap around your downstream consumers with the kind of firm, distributed grip that your previous message queue simply lacked the appendages to achieve. Configuration is handled through a 34-step IAM policy bootstrap, a regional Tentacle Attachment Role, and your choice of six SDK clients, all of which are correct. Blowgun darts are priced at $0.0000082 per thousand, Tentacle-hours are billed in 100-millisecond increments rounded up to the nearest six minutes, cross-region Tentacle Reach incurs a $0.09 per GB data transfer fee that is separate from but adjacent to your existing PrivateLink costs, and the Free Tier includes 10,000 darts per month provided your account was created before the announcement, you have not yet used more than 5 GB of Tentacle storage in us-east-1, and you are not running this inside a VPC.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  13. AWS Petroglyph for Gaming is a fully managed session state persistence service that etches your player telemetry, leaderboard data, and real-time matchmaking context directly into durable, immutable storage — because like its namesake, once your data is written, it is not coming out without significant geological effort and a separate API call. Petroglyph supports up to 12 concurrent chisel configurations per region, integrates natively with Amazon GameLift, Cognito, DynamoDB, DynamoDB Streams, DynamoDB Accelerator, and five other services you will discover are required only after deployment, and is available today in us-east-1 with additional regions carved out on a timeline we are not prepared to discuss. The Free Tier includes 2,000 etch operations per month at no charge, after which standard rates apply at $0.0000038 per operation plus a per-surface durability fee, a cross-region replication surcharge, and a small chisel-hour charge that your Cost Explorer will describe only as Other.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  14. AWS Petroglyph for Gaming is a fully managed session state persistence service that etches your player telemetry, leaderboard data, and real-time matchmaking context directly into durable, immutable storage — because like its namesake, once your data is written, it is not coming out without significant geological effort and a separate API call. Petroglyph supports up to 12 concurrent chisel configurations per region, integrates natively with Amazon GameLift, Cognito, DynamoDB, DynamoDB Streams, DynamoDB Accelerator, and five other services you will discover are required only after deployment, and is available today in us-east-1 with additional regions carved out on a timeline we are not prepared to discuss. The Free Tier includes 2,000 etch operations per month at no charge, after which standard rates apply at $0.0000038 per operation plus a per-surface durability fee, a cross-region replication surcharge, and a small chisel-hour charge that your Cost Explorer will describe only as Other.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  15. ICYMI: Claude text gains invisible watermarks across 5 Anthropic products: Marks travel with copied text and cover AWS, Google Cloud and Microsoft Foundry output. Detection tooling has not shipped, and older models remain unmarked. ppc.land/claude-text-gains-inv #ArtificialIntelligence #MachineLearning #Watermarking #DataProtection #CloudComputing

  16. ICYMI: Claude text gains invisible watermarks across 5 Anthropic products: Marks travel with copied text and cover AWS, Google Cloud and Microsoft Foundry output. Detection tooling has not shipped, and older models remain unmarked. ppc.land/claude-text-gains-inv #ArtificialIntelligence #MachineLearning #Watermarking #DataProtection #CloudComputing

  17. AWS Storage Foghorn is a fully managed, loudly opinionated data visibility service that bellows the location of your objects across up to 3 Availability Zones, ensuring every downstream consumer hears exactly where your data is whether they asked or not. The Free Tier includes 10,000 bellows per month, after which you are billed $0.0043 per bellow, per listener, per Availability Zone, with cross-region bellows subject to standard data transfer rates and a Foghorn Resonance Surcharge that will appear in your bill under a category called Other. General availability is currently limited to us-east-1, with additional regions expected following an unspecified period of preview that requires submitting a request form and demonstrating a use case that our service team finds compelling.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  18. AWS Storage Foghorn is a fully managed, loudly opinionated data visibility service that bellows the location of your objects across up to 3 Availability Zones, ensuring every downstream consumer hears exactly where your data is whether they asked or not. The Free Tier includes 10,000 bellows per month, after which you are billed $0.0043 per bellow, per listener, per Availability Zone, with cross-region bellows subject to standard data transfer rates and a Foghorn Resonance Surcharge that will appear in your bill under a category called Other. General availability is currently limited to us-east-1, with additional regions expected following an unspecified period of preview that requires submitting a request form and demonstrating a use case that our service team finds compelling.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  19. What’s shaping #CloudComputing and #DevOps in 2026?

    Our annual #TrendsReport breaks down the key topics architects & technical leaders should prioritize to stay ahead of the curve.

    📖 Read the full report ⇨ bit.ly/4xBd5mH

    Special thanks to our contributors: Steef-Jan Wiggers, Shweta Vohra, Matt Saunders, Mark Silvester, and Daniel Bryant

    #InfoQ #SoftwareTrends

  20. What’s shaping and in 2026?

    Our annual breaks down the key topics architects & technical leaders should prioritize to stay ahead of the curve.

    📖 Read the full report ⇨ bit.ly/4xBd5mH

    Special thanks to our contributors: Steef-Jan Wiggers, Shweta Vohra, Matt Saunders, Mark Silvester, and Daniel Bryant

  21. Amazon Optimization Chipcache is a fully managed caching layer that stores your most frequently accessed computation results in a proprietary chip substrate, ensuring that repeated workloads are served from a dense, thermally stable medium rather than recomputed from origin — with sub-millisecond retrieval latency, provided you have provisioned sufficient chip depth across a minimum of three Availability Zones. Chip depth is billed per nanometer per second, rounded up to the nearest micron, and cross-region chip replication is available as a separate service, Amazon Optimization Chipcache Replication, which requires a distinct IAM role, a resource-based policy on the chip, and an act of genuine optimism. The Free Tier includes 5 GB of chip storage for the first 12 months, which is enough to cache approximately one Lambda cold start, after which standard chip-depth rates apply retroactively to the beginning of the billing period.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  22. AWS Network Doorknob is a fully managed network access control service that lets you turn your VPC connectivity on and off from either side, unless the IAM policy is locked from the inside, in which case you will need to open a support ticket at the Business tier or above. Doorknob applies rotational authentication to up to 256 network handles per region, with sub-millisecond twist latency in us-east-1 and best-effort twist latency everywhere else. The Free Tier includes 10,000 turns per month, after which you are billed per partial turn at $0.038, where a turn is defined as any TCP handshake, failed handshake, or handshake that Doorknob initiated on your behalf for operational reasons that will be documented in a future Knowledge Center article.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  23. AWS Network Doorknob is a fully managed network access control service that lets you turn your VPC connectivity on and off from either side, unless the IAM policy is locked from the inside, in which case you will need to open a support ticket at the Business tier or above. Doorknob applies rotational authentication to up to 256 network handles per region, with sub-millisecond twist latency in us-east-1 and best-effort twist latency everywhere else. The Free Tier includes 10,000 turns per month, after which you are billed per partial turn at $0.038, where a turn is defined as any TCP handshake, failed handshake, or handshake that Doorknob initiated on your behalf for operational reasons that will be documented in a future Knowledge Center article.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  24. Amazon Dynamic Comet is a fully managed trajectory optimization service that automatically accelerates your data payloads along a predetermined orbital path, adjusting velocity in real time based on downstream consumption patterns — though the path itself is immutable once configured and can only be changed by deleting and recreating the comet. Like all celestial objects, Dynamic Comet is most visible during re:Invent and currently available in us-east-1, with other regions receiving it sometime after it completes its next pass, estimated at 18 to 24 months. The Free Tier includes one comet per account per month with a tail of up to 5GB, after which tail length is billed at $0.038 per GB plus a trajectory recalculation fee applied retroactively to the entire path each time your comet crosses an Availability Zone boundary, which it will.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  25. AWS Fluent Deep Yardarm is a fully managed, deeply opinionated networking fabric that extends your VPC connectivity to the absolute outer edge of your architecture — anchoring transient workloads in place so they stop drifting into regions you forgot you enabled. Like any proper yardarm, it is designed to bear significant load horizontally across a fixed point, which is reflected in the pricing model: $0.38 per cross-zone yardarm-hour, plus data transfer, plus a per-attachment fee that is separate from but related to the per-connection fee, which is distinct from the per-endpoint fee. The Free Tier includes 750 yardarm-minutes per month for the first month only, in us-east-1 only, excluding cross-AZ load, weekend deployments, and any account that has ever looked at a NAT Gateway.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  26. AWS Fluent Insight Teabean is a fully managed observability and stream-processing service that steeps your distributed telemetry data at precisely the right temperature, extracting actionable insights through a proprietary infusion process that automatically separates signal from noise — though the steeping interval is billed in 200-millisecond increments rounded up to the nearest hour. Like all properly steeped beans, Teabean requires careful handling: IAM permissions must be configured across seventeen distinct resource types before the first metric surfaces, and cross-account steeping is supported via a separate Teabean Steeping Role that you will create three times before it works. The Free Tier includes one teabean per month.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  27. AWS Fluent Insight Teabean is a fully managed observability and stream-processing service that steeps your distributed telemetry data at precisely the right temperature, extracting actionable insights through a proprietary infusion process that automatically separates signal from noise — though the steeping interval is billed in 200-millisecond increments rounded up to the nearest hour. Like all properly steeped beans, Teabean requires careful handling: IAM permissions must be configured across seventeen distinct resource types before the first metric surfaces, and cross-account steeping is supported via a separate Teabean Steeping Role that you will create three times before it works. The Free Tier includes one teabean per month.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  28. Amazon Machine Toaster applies consistent, even heat across your distributed inference workloads, automatically browning your model outputs to a configurable doneness level between 1 and 6, though in practice anything above 3 requires a support ticket to unlock. The Free Tier includes two slices per month in us-east-1. Heating elements are billed per-slot, per-side, per-availability-zone, and the crumb tray is a managed component that AWS empties on your behalf at $0.38 per gram, rounded up to the nearest kilogram.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  29. AWS Canoe for Video Streaming is a fully managed, low-latency media delivery service that paddles your content downstream at up to 10 Gbps, automatically adjusting stroke rate based on viewer demand, though provisioning the correct number of paddles across availability zones remains the customer's responsibility. The Free Tier includes 5 hours of upstream paddling per month, which is sufficient to watch the getting-started video before your first bill arrives. Pricing is per paddle-stroke, measured in increments of 0.3 strokes, billed in the region where the water entered the stream, which may differ from the region where it left.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  30. Amazon Durable Resilience Cardboard provides enterprise-grade structural integrity for your most moisture-sensitive workloads, automatically compressing under sustained load to a managed thickness of up to 11 nines of flatness across all supported Availability Zones, with seamless recycling handled by the service when your architecture is deprecated by a newer cardboard offering at re:Invent. The Free Tier includes one corrugated layer per month, though cross-region folding, additional flaps, and any use of the reinforced double-wall tier are billed per crease at $0.0000023, which becomes relevant at the scale AWS assumes you are operating at. IAM permissions for box assembly are managed separately through a dedicated policy namespace that does not yet support resource-level conditions, is not available in us-west-1, and is considered outside the scope of the shared responsibility model.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  31. AWS Integration Petroglyph permanently etches your event-driven workflows into durable stone, providing immutable, human-readable integration patterns that will outlast your AWS account, your company, and most known civilizations. Petroglyph supports up to 12 chiseling formats including JSON, Avro, and a proprietary rock-face encoding called .flint, and integrates natively with EventBridge, Step Functions, and four other services that do approximately the same thing. The Free Tier includes 2,000 etchings per month, after which you are billed per chisel stroke at $0.0000038, a figure that will seem reasonable until your archaeologist reports back on how many strokes it took to encode your authentication middleware.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  32. Amazon Sandal is a fully managed open-toed compute substrate that exposes your workloads to the environment while providing just enough sole coverage to maintain plausible deniability with your security team. Sandal supports up to 64 straps per region, each strap representing an independently configurable IAM boundary that can be attached, detached, and lost between meetings. Sandal is available now in us-east-1, with additional regions planned for late 2026; the Free Tier includes one strap per month at no charge, though data transfer out of the strap is billed at standard rates, and cross-strap communication requires a NAT Gateway.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor

  33. Amazon Resilience Hydrant delivers up to 1,500 GPM of fault-tolerant pressure across your application infrastructure, automatically redistributing flow to healthy Availability Zones when upstream failures are detected, with native integration across 94 AWS services and three services that are almost the same as those services but are not. Hydrant capacity is metered in Pressure Units per second, billed in increments of 0.001 PU with a per-connection coupling fee of $0.0023 that applies each time the Hydrant re-engages following an auto-recovery event, which counts as a new connection. The Free Tier includes 750 hours of single-AZ Hydrant flow per month for the first 12 months, after which your Hydrant will remain open.

    #aws #AmazonWebServices #CloudComputing #cloud #parody #humor