#canadahaha — Public Fediverse posts

Madcap billionaire Ego Husk, owner, CEO (Chief Execrable Officer), and CSA (Chief Shitposting Autocrat) of social media site Twittler, has announced his strategic plan to use chat-bot AI to generate thousands of virtual employees on-demand whom he can fire when he is feeling bored.

#twittler #twitterdown #birdsite #egohusk #elonmusk #canadahaha #canadarit #humour #satire #naricissocialmedia #hightechbubble #techbubble

Social media site Twittler announces new verified-user feature: for a small additional monthly fee, users can have a green badge to verify that they are especially addicted to ad-sponsored nonsense.

#canadahaha #canadarit #humour #satire #twitterdown #twitter #elonmusk #egohusk #birdsite

In the grand tradition of Soviet oratory, Russian dictator-for-life Vladimir Poopootin gave his pseudo-parliament a two-hour speech to describe just how well the latest Russian catastrophe is going.

#canadahaha #canadarit #humour #satire #russia #putin #poopootin #oligarchy #oiligarchy

EV maker Tesla issues recall notice for more than 360K vehicles, says "Full Self-Driving" software may seriously malfunction in some cases and attempt to run Twitter.

#canadahaha #canadarit #humour #satire #tesla #FullSelfDriving #FoolSelfDriving #FullSelfDarwin #DarwinAward #birdsie #twitter #twittler #egohusk #elonmusk

While in Ottawa recently, Alberta premier Downadeepwell Smith created an inspirational political video exhorting all Canadians to end divise politics and to work together to build a strong Canada where even muddle-brained codswallop about First Nations history and climate-change may one day be welcomed as if she actually had a clue any day of the week.

#cdnpoli #abpoli #canada #canadahaha #canadarit #oilberta #freedumb #freedumbanddumber #FreedumbOfShpiel

Canadian government warns of sophisticated new scam targetting consumers by telephone and e-mail, report says scam can be identified by the fact that the caller assumes that Canadians have any money.

#cdnpoli #canadahaha #canadarit #humour #satire #economy #scam

Conservasaur leader Putrid Pooleaver says his party will ask the Auditor General to review the amounts paid by the federal government to consulting firm McKinsey for advice, because the government under former Conservasaur PM Steelhair Harper never asked anyone for advice about anything and everyone remembers what a great human touch the Harper government had.

#cdnpoli #canada #canadahaha #canadarit #humour #satire #mckinsey #conservasaurs #poilievre

With Canadian health care nearing full collapse as people are sick and dying in hallways of understaffed hospitals across the country, the provincial premiers will meet this week with the Prime Minister to ask the federal government for more money, because directly raising the taxes of rich people and corporations would obviously be immoral.

#cdnpoli #canada #healthcare #canadahaha #canadarit #humour #satire

After University of Lethbridge cancels lecture by crackpot former professor (Widdowson, not Peterson) who has maintained that residential schools had a positive side, Alberta's Education minister announced bold new measures to strengthen Albertans' Freedumb of Shpiel.

#cdnpoli #abpoli #canada #canadahaha #canadarit #humour #satire #oilberta #Freedumb #Freedumbanddumber #FreedumbOfShpiel #conservasaurs #UnenlightenedConservasaurParty

Federal Conservasaur leader Putrid Pooleaver continued this week to apply his strategy of uniting Canadian voters by blaming PM Justin Turtledove for anything that could possibly be wrong anywhere in the country, including corked wine, colicky babies, and low air pressure in automobile tires.

#cdnpoli #canada #canadahaha #canadarit #humour #satire #poilievre #pooleaver #conservasaurs

Ontario Premier Doodles Ford is reportedly frustrated that left-leaning news media consistently misrepresents his sincere concern for the health and well-being of the province's wealthy.

#cdnpoli #onpoli #canadahaha #canadarit #humour #satire #cronytario #publichealth

The federal government intends to welcome more than 1.4 million new permanent residents to Canada in the next few years, and at 10 to a room they should be able to enjoy all that the current economy has to offer.

#cdnpoli #canada #canadahaha #canadarit #humour #satire #economy

The offices of Ontario's Integrity Commissioner and the Auditor General say they will investigate the highly unusual coincidence of Premier Doodles Ford opening his mouth and nature getting devoured.

#cdnpoli #canada #canadahaha #canadarit #humour #satire #Cronytario #greenbelt

Premier Downadeepwell Smith of the unceded, unconquered province of Alberta reportedly continues to make progress in learning to identify characteristics of the Canadian legal system that differ from whatever nonsense typically fills the heads of UCP crackpots.

#cdnpoli #canada #canadahaha #canadarit #Oilberta #satire #humour

Post-Kenney fill-in Premier Downadeepwell Smith of the unceded and unconquered province of Alberta has clarified that she used "imprecise" language about having discussed cases with Crown prosecutors, what she really meant to say is that she was in fact "shooting off her mouth in all directions."

#cdnpoli #canada #canadahaha #canadarit #Oilberta #satire #humour

Federal conservasaur leader Putrid Pooleaver spoke at the Freedumb Centre for Public Policy in Winnipeg this week, where he further described his vision of a future where all Canadians, whether white or something else less desirable, can parade half-baked opinions and maybe even lead a federal party to unforeseen depths of self-inflicted shame. But on the other hand, he avoided mentioning crypto.

#cdnpoli #canadahaha #canadarit #satire #humour #conservasaurs #poilievre #freedumb #Oilberta

Freedumb protesters said to be planning a reunion event in 2023 have reportedly splintered into two main factions: those who demand that the Governor General dissolve Parliament and join them to form a coalition that will save Canada from imminent collapse into an organ-harvesting leftist dictatorship, and those who have a consistently poor grasp of reality.

#Canada #cdnpoli #Canadahaha #Canadarit #humour #satire #Freedumb #Freedumbanddumber #lowIQanon

A US research group warns that Canadians who listen to US news, use US social media, and pay more attention to US politics than they do to Canadian politics are more likely to suffer long-term reduction in the faculties that have traditionally been associated with having a working brain.

#Canada #cdnpoli #Canadarit #Canadahaha #satire #Freedumb #Freedumbanddumber #humour

By 9:45 on the morning of January 3rd, 2023, the country's richest CEOs have not only already earned more than an average worker's annual wage, they have also completely forgotten that Ebenezer Scrooge was a remarkable prick.

#cdnpoli #Canada #Canadarit #Canadahaha #humour #satire

Vigils around the world mark the 64th day of billionaire slap-head Ego Husk's purchase of Twittler, turning a not-so-profitable business into a social-media dumpster fire that leaves ex-employees, refugees, and investors wondering just how many billions it might take to build a time machine and send the slap-head back to his room without dinner.

#birdsite #twittler #egohusk #elonmusk #twitterdown #Canadahaha #Canadarit #humour #satire

Statistics Canada reports that 47,212 people left Ontario in the past two years because that's how long it took to cross highway 401 through Toronto.

#Canada #Toronto #Charawna #Canadarit #Canadahaha #humour #satire