#bodydysmorphia — Public Fediverse posts

As I get more fit, my clothes have started to fit me differently.

All of my size 34 shorts are now too small to fit on my hips, where I attempted to hide my body by draping my clothes there.

Which led to clothing style choices, like cargo shorts that (for some reason) do not have the same fitted waist that other shorts do.

All of my more fitted 34 waist shorts now fit, but only if I wear them AT MY WAIST which for me is basically my belly button, a good 2-4" higher than I've ever worn anything (for reals).

So now I understand everything about how pants are cut for men that I was never taught, but also could not understand because of my broken posture.

At age 53 I am learning that the cut of the garment is helping encourage that posture.

I'm starting to feel like... I almost started to type "a different person", and that's true...

But it's Me, in the flesh. Different from what I was because it's someone that doesn't reject their own corporeal existence.

I feel myself liking myself, not because I'm being good and eating well and working out. But because I'm getting a connection to my own body that I never got the chance to have.

#BodyDysmorphia #OCD #CPTSD

I've been on a little writing hiatus, because of life getting in the way, but I realised it's a pretty important anniversary and I felt compelled to write to myself about it.

CW for descriptions of binge eating disorder and body dysmorphia

One Year: https://robyneatseverything.com/one-year/

#BingeEatingDisorder #EatingDisorderRecovery #BodyDysmorphia

My covid has rescheduled our third date, so I have a couple more weeks to worry about *this*:

"Now everything has been triggered, it’s left me terrified to let him see me naked. See my stomach naked...I feel that, because he’s so good-looking and perfect and out of my league, my body will disappoint him, disgust him, like it disgusts me."

https://robyneatseverything.com/punching/

#bodydysmorphia #BingeEatingDisorder #datingblog #thirddate

A new post all about my fear of "punching above my weight" (please don't shout at me, I'm very small and my mind is illogical)

"I'm seeing this guy I really like. I keep referring to him as Perfect Guy, because to me, he is...There is one problem though; I'm utterly terrified of fucking him"

CW for body dysmorphia, eating disorders, and a mention of self-mutilation.

https://robyneatseverything.com/punching/

#sexblog #bodydysmorphia #BingeEatingDisorder

Video idea I had while driving home that's interesting to me AND will bring in views--"5 (or 10) reasons why having big boobs sucks."

-look up bra prices and inconsistent sizing
-how a busty woman wearing the exact same shirt will be considered "slutty" while a smaller breasted person wont
-added gender dysphoria for those who don't identify as women. Binding can be very dangerous and uncomfortable. Breast removal can be very expensive and painful. Also not generally allowed fo rminors, so that's added years of dysphoria to deal with.
-higher rates of breast cancer? Not sure if true, will have to research
-more and faster sag, which shouldn't matter in our society, yet are yet another grounds on which women's bodies are judged.
-really uncomfortable during exercise, requires thicker and more uncomfortable (and more expensive) bras
-maybe racial expectations? Will have to ask for feedback from marginalized people if this is true.
-biggest reason--unwanted attention. The misogynist perspective of our society dictates that the biggest compliment a man can give a woman is to let her know she's "fuckable, " and that's especially true for someone who's busty. You can't help being born busty--yes you could starve yourself to make your breasts smaller, but why would you destroy your body like that? And again, breasts reduction is expensive and painful, and doesn't help minors who develop faster. Many women will intentionally wear baggy clothes just to try to minimize their breast size, and will avoid many other clothing types just to avoid increasing sexual harassment. The onus as always should be on other people--mostly men--to keep their comments to themselves, but we're a long way from every achieving that (of its even possible) and in the meantime, getting sexually harassed just for having a body attribute you can't even help having really sucks.

I would love to get the perspective of other people with large breasts (or maybe not large, but just what they have to deal with overall), maybe submitted video clips, or text comments for me to read aloud. Would especially love the perspective of busty people who don't identify as women, or maybe who do, who got breast implants and now regret it? Idk will think on it.

Maybe I'll do a future video on why small boobs suck, though Tbh that would get a lot fewer views (not that views are the only or even the most important metric on which I decide to base what subjects I cover).

Anything else about being busty I should include? I just had this idea a few minutes ago and already my brain is exploding with inspiration, lol.

Ps thanks again to @eldritch.cafe for having a 5000 character count, so I can get all these thoughts out in one message instead of a whole thread. I really, really appreciate it ❤️

#backPain #bigBoobs #breastSize #bodyPositivity #misogyny #sexualHarassment #bodyDysmorphia #sexWorker #sexualEducation #feminism #intersectionalFeminism

Been feeling nauseous all day. Finally managed to eat something small and all the blood going to my digestive system had me shivering with cold so hard I got a heart rate alarm from my watch!
I think it’s the physical blowback from the effort of compartmentalizing surging #BodyDysmorphia brought on by a careless healthcare provider revealing my weight to me shortly after telling her I struggle with #ED. I used a new visualization tool my therapist taught me, but it takes a lot of energy to keep shoving disruptive parts away.

I’ve apparently “completed” the Chloe Ting abs challenge but given my lack of Pilates attendance I’ma gonna keep going.

Funny thing is I actually felt more bloated today than I did on day 1 but the photo doesn’t seem to show it. The body dysmorphia is strong with this one. #chloetingabschallenge #absworkout #bodydysmorphia #ocd